a waste of breath
Why is life so hard?
and the worst thing is, i know i have it easy. there are people who dont have food, and i'm moaning about getting in a fight with my parents.
the thing is, i know that this is nothing everyone hasn't already felt, nothing fresh, nothing newsworthy. i dont even know why i'm writing this down, posting this sad little entry for the world to read or (most likely) not read, and each little word i write makes me feel that much worse.
so i whine about how i'm tired, how life has become purely routine, how i'm invisible to the opposite sex, how there's a cajillion things wrong with my life and i just can't seem to break even.
my last entry was happy. at least, it made me smile. and i do want things to be that way, and they can be, and i want to go outside and forget everything, and i can. but eventually reality slaps me in the face and its time for school, or soccer, or going home to my fucked up family, or trying to block out my mom's accusing words.
i wish my brother hadn't moved out.
i wish i didn't have to stay.
i wish i could rearrange the world whenever i fancy a change from this bullshit.
all of those people who are doing just fine, i applaude you.
and i'm really sorry if i let you down lately, or ruined your good mood with this dumb ass emo journal entry.
thank you new york.
and the worst thing is, i know i have it easy. there are people who dont have food, and i'm moaning about getting in a fight with my parents.
the thing is, i know that this is nothing everyone hasn't already felt, nothing fresh, nothing newsworthy. i dont even know why i'm writing this down, posting this sad little entry for the world to read or (most likely) not read, and each little word i write makes me feel that much worse.
so i whine about how i'm tired, how life has become purely routine, how i'm invisible to the opposite sex, how there's a cajillion things wrong with my life and i just can't seem to break even.
my last entry was happy. at least, it made me smile. and i do want things to be that way, and they can be, and i want to go outside and forget everything, and i can. but eventually reality slaps me in the face and its time for school, or soccer, or going home to my fucked up family, or trying to block out my mom's accusing words.
i wish my brother hadn't moved out.
i wish i didn't have to stay.
i wish i could rearrange the world whenever i fancy a change from this bullshit.
all of those people who are doing just fine, i applaude you.
and i'm really sorry if i let you down lately, or ruined your good mood with this dumb ass emo journal entry.
thank you new york.