Introductory Rant
I hate them, I hate them, I hate them, I hate them, I hate them, I hate them, I hate them, I hate them, I hate them, I hate them, I hate them, I hate them, I hate them, I hate them!!!
*Ahem, if you USE the SUVs for their intended towing purpose, or you actually need nine seats (my family at one point did, although we refused to buy one) you're not who I'm mad at*
Ugh! Let us all forget and forgive the fact that they tear apart the environment double time with their gas guzzling no, lets just think about SIZE for a moment shall we?
Sidenote: I get 30MPG.. bitch.
I have a Honda, and no not an itty bitty Civic, I have what USED TO BE (not that long ago either) considered a 'mid-size Sedan.' But noooooo! I'm sitting on the 101 surrounded by MONSTERS! Huge magambo sized faux trucks with wheels that are higher than my window, even on the stock models. So high, you need effing steps to get inside, STEPS. Thanks to this ingenious mix of height and yet somehow still narrowed (remind me who thought of that little rollover idea) if I were to say, rear end them I would just slide under the trunk and crash into the wheels... my car isn't an effing lowrider. If it were to hit me head on or to the side... I'd hate to even imagine. Which is pretty sad since my car is not a rust bucket or a tin can either. I sit in traffic surrounded by these demons, you bet I feel like crap. If I die because of being hit by another mommy running a red (from the rallies, I have been able to observe 9/10 SUV drivers are the ones to run reds) they can just either drive on or watch a DVD until the police come to take my poor carcass away. It matters little if the accident was my fault or there’s, they chose to drive that size vehicle.
These drivers think that they own the road! Which is ironic since in Southern CA I'd honestly estimate... okay in my town that they literally are 70% of vehicles on the road. So every driver in every SUV thinks that they are 'the shit' and have an automatic right of way. Believe me, it happens. In fact, it happened eight times this morning. Cut off by a Yukon, nearly clipped by those hideous Mercedes SUVs that look like baby sneakers, tailgated by one of those ridiculously sized new F-150s which ironically add in bulk all over the vehicle, but not a huge addition of sqaure footage (really useful) and that woman had a 'hail to the princess' braket on her stupid truck, I was cut off (and flipped off) by a H2 covered in Bush/Cheney and 'we will never forget' memoralbilia...
Although the stereotype is that these drivers are mostly women (it's true) I'd say it's only 60/40. There are horrible male drivers behind these monstrosities as well.
But as for the women... ahh the women. Yes, for those I apply the label SmUV's (pronounced: es-moo-vee) provided for those with 1-2 kids and get those giants. I got in one the other day (with a woman that has 4 kids and USES it to tow, so I give her more of a pass) holy crap! Not only are these things weapons, but there... was no difference in interior space. I would have thought I was in a narrow station wagon... with even less leg room. Holy frijoles! I couldn't even believe that all of these women who claim the SmUV for their little sprogs don't even have that! Man, at least the Odyssey is a Honda and has like 12 cup holders.
Oohh but back to these women, welcome to paranoia-ville where too fast is never enough and children mean much more than your stinky little life. "Baby on board?" By all means, you must get to that soccer meeting ASAP for little Timmy, feel free to run down my heathen self with your gigantic tires. Oh, please make sure that they are retrofitted with the most gaudy rims that you can, so I can have chards of chrome in my scull so I can sparkle in SUV goodness to the grave. After all, not only am I childless but I bear no fish on my car and to boot, a Kerry/Edwards sticker and a pentacle, so I must repent.
Has anyone bothered to point out that these things are ugly? I mean sweet Moses, they are gas guzzling demons, they tear up the streets (Trucks over three tons are banned in many areas because the reverberation caused by them causes old buildings and streets to slowly disintegrate and crack, but no one applies this rule to SUVs), they actually DON'T provide a huge difference in room, they're never used for their purpose (except for the rare yuppie 'once a year' sport), fatalities are much more likely if you are hit by one and to BOOT... they're ugly. I know that's a matter of opinion but seriously there is nothing or sexy to be applied to a modified truck.
A few weeks ago I saw a H2 stretch limo (privately owned, NOT a rental there are 4 of those I have seen out here) on fire down the street. Luckily, everyone was out of the car and safe just looking at the inferno.
I couldn't help but think "burn baby, burn."
(x-posted to my journal)