There's No Good Time to Discuss This, by omphale

Sep 25, 2006 02:45

Title: There's No Good Time to Discuss This ( Read more... )

author: omphale, fraser/kowalski

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Comments 31

llassah September 25 2006, 08:28:36 UTC
Oh, this is good! I love the shifting perspectives and the clever way you've woven the episodes into the stories, and Ray and Fraser's internal voices are spot on. brilliant, really original and fresh. A good way to start a Monday *g*

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omphale23 September 25 2006, 17:19:13 UTC
Thanks so much! This one was weird, and I really wasn't sure that it worked. I'm glad the Fraser voice worked for you.

(Also, I love your icon. It makes me giggle.)

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ultra_chrome September 25 2006, 09:50:43 UTC
Wow...and Wow!

I put that prompt in and I have to say I'm in love with the way you handled it. :)

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omphale23 September 25 2006, 17:20:06 UTC
Oh, good. I was worried about where it went, since I wasn't sure what you were looking for. Glad you approve!

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slidellra September 25 2006, 13:58:10 UTC
I absolutely adore this, especially your graceful use of canon. It's a lovely, powerful, spare story, and your use of parentheses completely works for me.

If you have the time or inclination to explore it, I'd love hearing your thoughts about/intentions with the Last Night "kiss" line. I'm so literal that I'm having a hard time fitting it in with the rest of the story, but I suspect I'm missing something good.

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the text is spare because all the overblown analysis gets stuck in my comments omphale23 September 25 2006, 18:25:15 UTC
I do have a weakness for parenthetical asides--I think Ray's brain keeps arbitrarily shifting topics on him, and Fraser's trying to talk himself out of what he really wants, so they have all these little left brain-right brain arguments when I write. Plus, I'm addicted to adjectives ( ... )

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omphale23 September 25 2006, 18:27:20 UTC
Oh, and thanks for the feedback! I got so carried away with picking apart the line that I forgot to say that I'm pleased you like the story. Oops.

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Re: the text is spare because all the overblown analysis gets stuck in my comments slidellra September 25 2006, 19:43:38 UTC
Oh, thank you. Enjoyed your analysis, and rereading the fic after was a richer experience.

That's a sneaky little point you have about "an outsider looking in and identifying what he sees as love." Made me think more on Ray's assertion that Fraser loves him. I like the possibility for uncertainty I found in that statement on rereading, the implication that love is an act of faith and trust, rather than a provable, static fact.

Yay dvd commentary!

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sam80853 September 25 2006, 16:10:56 UTC
That's truly wonderful with the changing perspectives and using canon and ... just everything!

Because now Ray wants, more than anything, to kiss Fraser without the threat of anyone’s impending demise. He wants to talk about air without wondering what he’s really giving away. He wants to be able to hold hands without a car chase. He wants to run to Fraser for something more than safe harbor.

YEAH!

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omphale23 September 25 2006, 17:30:04 UTC
Thank you! Ray wants an awful lot, and he wants all of it more than everything he's got--the list kept getting longer and longer, until I finally had to walk away from it. I was nervous about referencing canon so much, and I'm glad it worked for you!

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bluebrocade September 25 2006, 17:44:18 UTC
Nice! I like the style with the hidden/secret thoughts in parens. Cool idea.

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omphale23 September 25 2006, 18:18:07 UTC
TYK--I'm relieved that people like the style, and that nobody's said (not yet, anyway) "isn't this just a sneaky way to avoid writing dialogue?" :)

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