Fic: I Just Can't Help Falling
I Just Can’t Help Falling
Author: gestaltrose aka chaosrosa
Title: I Just Can’t Help Falling
Pairing: Jared/Jensen
Rating: NC-17, if you are not old enough don't click
Word count: 4400 or so
Beta: The wonderful realscape (thank you *kisses*)and I messed with it after I got it back. Any and all mistakes are mine.
Warnings: slash, shmoop, fluff, sex sex sex, a little D/s
Disclaimer: All of this is made up. Fiction. None of it reflect anything that may or may not have happened between these two hot men. *nods*
Summary: There is a wedding and Jensen finds out something about Jared. (I suck at summaries - it’s good and pretty short. . .go read)
Notes: This was written for j2_spn_100days also as a gift fic for schnute23. I offered to write her a story. She said Pairing Jensen/Jared, a first time (at a wedding, some jealous Jared before the *cough* NC17)? *heee*. This was written pre-break up so I am not Sandy bashing or anything. Title taken from the Elvis Presley song.
Jensen stood, smiling, as Sandy McCoy married someone other than Jared Padalecki. When he’d received the invitation he’d jumped at the chance, knowing that Jared and Sandy had stayed good friends (since their breakup),and that she would be inviting him too. He’d gotten there early, and Sandy had insisted that he sit on her side, as since he was practically family . Agreeing, because he thought that Jared would be sitting there too. Jensen was, therefore, disappointed when Jared didn’t materialize.
Wandering around the reception, he was snagged by Sandy, and dragged off into a corner to meet Sam (yeah, Jensen knew what irony was), her very cute, very gay cousin. She giggled, and left them there. Jensen had had a couple of the champagne cocktails, and maybe he was disappointed that Jared hadn’t shown up, and yeah, this guy (Sam, Jensen still laughed in his head), was cute and flirting with him.
Maybe he leaned in to hear what the guy was saying, no matter that it apparently looked like he was about to kiss the guy. Feeling a large heavy hand land on his shoulder, he jerked and started to turn.
“You, leave.” Jensen heard a command snapped out above his shoulder. Jared, Jensen thought with relief. Sam just disappeared, and Jensen started to turn again, but he was pressed forward into the wall. “You will follow me,” Jared growled low in his ear, and Jensen felt a shiver roll down his spine. Having only heard Jared get mad once, the memory of the moment was stuck in Jensen’s brain.
Jensen had been working on set for about eighteen hours, Jared about twelve, and Robert had asked him to do one more take of Sam’s death scene. Knowing that he was wiped out, emotionally and physically, he tried to tell him no, but Robert said just one more take. Making it through the take, he was sobbing as Dean, and as Jensen, and Jared had known it. So when Bobby had said just a few more reaction shots, Jared was up off the ground, where he was being held in Jensen’s arms, and in Robert’s face. Telling the man in a low quiet voice that if he didn’t stop this now, he was walking. Jensen had watched as Jared’s jaw clenched, and he finally saw where Jared could pull some of Sam’s anger from. Jensen remembered that Bobby had looked surprised.
Jared had told the man to look at Jensen, who was trying to not be noticed at the time, still kneeling on the ground. Jensen had glanced up, his eyes red and swollen from crying, and Robert had called it a wrap. Trying to get to his feet, he’d suddenly been taken in hand, and almost picked up. Jared had asked him if he was okay about a thousand times on the way back to the lot, Jensen had been exhausted, but he still knew that was the moment everything changed. Jensen became a little obsessed with his co-star, he could admit it now. But watching and wanting from afar was something different than having him press you up against a wall in the middle of his ex-fiancé’s wedding party.
Jensen knew that Jared could be passionate and feel very strongly about things, a whole lot of things. He’d often wondered where Jared got all his passion from. Dreaming about it being directed at him was one thing, but willfully intruding on someone else’s relationship was something very different. Jared had had Sandy, and Jensen hadn’t been about to go there.
Never considering himself gay, he’d honestly had trouble wrapping his brain around how much he cared about Jared. No, that was a lie. He’d liked and cared about Jared almost from the first moment he’d met him. However, this was different. Now he wanted Jared all the time. Knowing that, although Jared might attack him on a regular basis, his friend was about a straight as one could get. So he’d buried his feelings, sure that they weren’t reciprocated, and he’d smiled and carried on.
Now, as he followed Jared across the busy dance floor, he admired how good his friend looked in a suit. He could feel his apprehension swirling in his gut as they wove around dancers, heading for the exit. Why was Jared mad at him? Had he said something bad to Sandy? Jensen knew he wasn’t that drunk; hell, he was hardly buzzed. Jared had walked out the door and kept on walking; Jensen almost sprinting to catch up with him.
Night had fallen at some point during the reception. Walking side by side, Jensen felt, more than saw, Jared drop into a matching stride, and he felt something loosen inside him. It was as if everything that had been wrong suddenly fell into place. Jared walked for a block and a half away from the hotel where Sandy’s reception was being held, and then turned into an alley. Jensen followed, curious as to where this was going, even though his brain still swirled around Jared’s anger.
Jensen found himself shoved up against a brick wall with Jared looming over him. Jared never loomed, always going out of his way to play down his height, but now Jensen needed to tip his head back to see him. Angry; why was Jared so angry? Catching his breath at the emotions that ran across Jared’s face, lit from one side by a streetlight, and from the other by an exit sign that glowed overhead, Jensen had little trouble making them out.
“You. . . what. . .” Jared was breathing like he’d just run a race. “Oh, fuck it,” he said, and leaned in closer to Jensen. Watching in amazement, Jensen parted his lips as Jared wrapped his fingers around Jensen’s face and tilted it up.
Kissing Jared was everything he had imagined it would be, and Jensen was really confused. Sure Jared had been the kind of friend who was all over you all the time but, as much as Jensen had longed for it, Jared had never come across as gay, or even bisexual. Jesus, he and Sandy had been an item as long as he’d known him. Jensen might have fantasized about Jared wanting him, but he’d never expected this.
Jared must have sensed something, because he pulled back and searched Jensen’s face, while Jensen searched his. Reaching up, Jensen pulled Jared back in and licked his way inside Jared’s mouth. Then Jensen was shoved against the wall, and Jared was pulling at his clothes. The light dimmed in the alleyway, as someone walked between it and the streetlight. “Come home with me,” Jared asked, or demanded, Jensen wasn’t quite sure, and he really didn’t care.
“Yeah,” he said, and before he’d finished speaking, Jared was practically dragging him down the alley. “It’s okay,” Jensen tried to calm him down. Jared seemed to listen eventually, and stopped pulling at him. Straightening his tux, Jensen brushed off some imaginary dirt and then, digging in his pocket, he found his ticket for the valet parking.
“Do you have a car?” he asked Jared.
“What?” Jared appeared a bit distracted.
“A car, do you have a car?” Jensen repeated.
“No,” Jared shook his head.
“Then how. . .” Jensen let his voice trail off, it didn’t matter how Jared had gotten to the wedding.
“Sandy,” Jared said, and Jensen felt a spike of jealousy, “sent a limo.”
He held out his ticket to the valet as they got to the hotel’s parking lot, and then waited. The guy pulled up in Jensen’s truck. He loved coming to these things in his pickup, if for no other reason than to see the expression of distaste that flashed across people’s faces. Jared slid into the passenger’s seat as Jensen tipped the valet and got in. Driving to Jared’s place wasn’t that difficult, Jensen had been there before. However, this time it was different. Jared was sitting beside him, his hand on the back of Jensen’s neck and Jensen had never been this turned on, ever.
Finally pulling up to Jared’s apartment complex, Jensen punched in the code and got through the security gate. Privacy was expensive in California, but after he and Sandy had broken up, Jared had gotten some really weird fan mail, and decided to move here. Jared got out and was opening the door. Jensen trailing behind like one of Jared’s puppies. Speaking of puppies, Jensen thought, just as Sadie and Harley came barreling out of the house.
Jared smiled, and Jensen’s heart clenched. He actually put a hand up to his chest, it hurt so bad. Jared played with his pups for a bit, then he coaxed them back inside. Jensen, meanwhile, had grabbed a couple of beers out of the fridge, and had taken them into Jared’s living room. Twisting the top off of one, he sat Jared’s on the coffee table.
Sometimes Jensen wondered if Jared ever changed anything. The living room setup was exactly the same as it had been in Vancouver. Sofa, loveseat, recliner, television, with gaming systems spread out in front of it. Hell, Jensen thought that even the books were in the same order. Taking a drink, Jensen got up to look at Jared’s bookshelves. As always, Jared’s range of interests astounded him. Jensen read some, sure. But nothing like Jared. There were cultural anthropology books next to astronomy books. Scanning some more, Jensen saw humor, horror, biographies; if it was written down in English, Jared had probably read it, or at least heard of it.
Hearing Jared getting the dogs settled in the laundry room, Jensen felt his stomach begin to tighten again. He had forgotten, or had let himself forget, what was going on. Jared walked into the room, Jensen nodded at him, and then at the beer on the table. Rolling his eyes (and why was that necessary? Jensen wondered) Jared picked up the beer and opened it. Jensen’s eyes widened as Jared chugged the whole thing in a few moments.
“Come here,” Jared said. It wasn’t a polite request; it was a demand and Jensen considered, for a moment, not doing it. However, it wasn’t as if he didn’t want to. So, Jensen got up and walked over to Jared, and tilted his head back a little to look him in the eyes.
Jared growled and pulled Jensen close. “God, do you know what you do to me?” Jensen shook his head, even though he did have a pretty good idea about what Jared was going through, because he was going through it too.
Both of them, having lost their jackets at some point, began pulling at the other’s shirt. Jensen hit skin first, which he thought was amazing, because Jared had to have on as many layers as his character Sam wore. Jared’s breath hissed as Jensen ran his fingers over Jared’s flat stomach. Jensen kissed Jared’s throat, sucking at where his pulse fluttered beneath the skin.
Jared must have got tired of fighting Jensen’s buttons, because he grabbed the bottom of his shirt and pulled, buttons flying off and scattering on the floor. Then there was a flurry of movement, and clothing was taken off between kisses and caresses. Sitting on the couch beside each other, Jensen took his boots off, and Jared slipped out of his dress shoes and pants.
Feeling awkward for the first time since Jared had entered the room, Jensen shifted on the couch, taking his pants off while not looking at Jared. Jared, however, didn’t give him much time for contemplation. Standing, he slid his underwear off, and Jensen stared, he couldn’t help it. He had seen Jared naked before, hell they had practically lived in each other’s pocket in Vancouver, and it had been worse on set. Personal space meant very little to Jared, Jensen had learned. But Jensen had never seen Jared with a hard on, and the man was big, long and thick. Jensen was speechless.
Picking up on Jensen’s unease, Jared sat down beside him and squeezed his knee. Jared ran his hand up Jensen’s leg. Jensen could feel the pads of Jared’s fingers tracing a pattern in his skin as they moved up his inner thigh, stopping just before touching his dick. Whimpering as Jared pulled his hand back, Jensen reached out and held Jared’s hip, trying to pull him closer.
Jared pulled back and looked down at him. “I like you like this,” his voice was that low rumble that always went straight to Jensen’s cock, “All needy. I’ll give you what you want. You just have to tell me what that is.” And with that Jared sat back on the couch. Jensen looked at him and realized his mouth was hanging open. Jared, naked and with a hard on, was sitting across from him on the couch, arms folded, just waiting. Fuck.
Jensen’s eyes dropped to Jared’s dick. Mouth watering, Jensen worked up his courage. “I want to taste you, suck you off.” Eyes flicked upwards to Jared face to see his reaction. Jared smiled, and spread his legs to let Jensen in between them.
“That wasn’t so hard, was it? Stop,” Jared put a hand on Jensen’s shoulder as he was moving toward him. Jensen blushed, thinking he was doing something wrong. “Take your underwear off.”
Oh, that was all. Jensen felt a flush begin at his belly and move outward, until he felt he was burning up. Standing, he slid his briefs off, and was surprised as Jared wrapped his hand around Jensen’s flagging erection. All the higher functions of Jensen’s brain shut down. Moving closer, he put his hands on Jared’s arms. Jared’s hand moved, and Jensen’s fingers tightened against his biceps. “You sure about this?” Jared asked, and Jensen pulled Jared’s hand away from his now hard cock, and pushed him back.
Laying back, with his legs spread wide, Jared smiled. and Jensen dropped to his knees and took Jared’s hard cock in his hand. The size of Jared still scared him a little, but Jensen licked at the pre come that had beaded on the end of his cock, and someone moaned. Jensen thought it might have been him, as he licked Jared’s dick again, his tongue dipping in the small opening, gathering Jared’s flavor. Opening wide, and trying to make sure his teeth didn’t scrape, he sucked the head of Jared’s cock into his mouth.
Jared was making appropriately appreciative noises as Jensen licked and sucked on his dick. Taking it into his mouth, he tried to see how much he could get in. Afew inches and he was gagging. Jensen backed off, swallowed, and tried again.
“It’s good, you don’t. . .” Jared’s voice trailed off, as Jensen managed to get him down further. Nobody had ever said Jensen wasn’t a quick learner. He still gagged a little as he backed off, then he licked the head again, and his mouth was filled with the tang of Jared’s pre come. Looking up at Jared, he was a bit shocked by the predatory look in his eyes. Jensen let Jared slip out of his mouth, and he was pulled up for a kiss.
Gasping as their cocks rubbed, Jared took advantage and plundered his mouth. Jensen tilted his head back as Jared kissed, licked, and bit his way down Jensen’s neck. That was going to leave a mark, he thought, as Jared sucked on his neck. He supposed it was a good thing he was taking a break before his next job hunting foray. Jared’s hand slipped between them and grasped both their cocks together.
“You’re thinking too much. I’m obviously doing something wrong,” Jared said, and squeezed a bit, before stroking their cocks together. Jensen pushed down against Jared, and he might have whimpered, but he wasn’t sure. Jared’s other hand slid up his thigh and grabbed his ass. This time, Jensen knew that he moaned. “You want more?” Jared asked, and Jensen’s eyes closed as he nodded.
Jared smacked his ass, and Jensen’s eyes flew open. “I told you you needed to ask,” Jared said, as he smoothed his hand over the spot where he’d just hit Jensen. Jensen pressed back against it, and Jared gave him a crooked smile. “Like that, huh?”
Jensen nodded, and Jared hit him again, palm flat against his ass. Jensen’s cock pressed up against Jared’s. It was getting wet with all the pre come leaking out of him. “Yes,” Jensen hissed.
“You have something to ask me?”
“More, please,” Jensen whispered.
Jared brought his hand down again. Jensen felt like his ass must be nearly glowing now. Smoothing his hand across Jensen’s hot skin again, Jared kissed him. Feeling more and more desperate, Jensen kissed him back. Jared calmed him, slowing things down. Breaking the kiss off, Jared moved a little to let Jensen know that he wanted him to move. Getting off Jared, Jensen stood for a moment, feeling his unease coming back. What if he screwed thing up? What if he sucked, and not in a good way, in bed? What if… what if… Jensen was brought back to the moment by another swat on his ass.
“Stay with me,” Jared said, and took his hand, leading him to the bedroom. Jared’s bedroom. With Jared’s bed. Jensen stared at it, and Jared sat down and pulled him between his legs. “We don’t have to do this. We don’t have to do anything you don’t want to.” He looked into Jensen face, and it was then that Jensen knew that, no matter how self assured Jared acted; he was just as uncertain about where this was going as Jensen was.
Making up his mind, Jensen ran his fingers across Jared’s cheeks, and up into his messy hair, as he leaned down and kissed him. “I want to,” he said into his lips. “I want everything.”
Jared smiled broadly, dimples showing. “Some things I can do tonight, everything might take a while.”
“Good,” Jensen said, reaching down and stroking Jared’s cock. “Take as long as you’d like.”
Jared growled, and pulled Jensen to him, before flipping them over and settling between Jensen’s legs. “Right now, I wanna be inside you.”
Jensen felt his balls tighten up at the suggestion, his cock bobbing and brushing against Jared’s stomach. Jared moved, urging Jensen to move up to the head of the bed. Getting out lube and condoms, he set them on the bed within reach, and then he bent down and took Jensen’s cock in his mouth. Jared obviously knew what he was doing as he took Jensen in all the way down to the base. “Uug,” Jensen made an incoherent noise.
Jared looked up, and Jensen nearly came right then. Jared’s mouth was stretched around his cock, his hazel green eyes looking up at him. Fuck. Jensen let his head drop back on the bed, and Jared hummed. He couldn’t stop his hips from jerking upwards into the moist, hot heat of Jared’s mouth, but Jared didn’t seem to mind. Instead, he felt something cold and wet pressing against his asshole. Jared’s finger, slick with lube circled and pressed, not quite hard enough to breach the ring of muscle.
It felt good, and then Jared’s tongue was licking around his hole and, holy fuck, who knew that felt that fucking good? Jared did, obviously, because he just responded to Jensen’s gasps with more tongue. Then he moved back to Jensen’s dick, sucking on him, as his finger breached Jensen. Honestly, he was a little surprised that it didn’t hurt, but it didn’t; it felt really really good. Jared fucked him with one finger, and then added a second. He licked up Jensen’s chest, fingers buried in his ass, and then he bit down on his nipple. Jensen tightened down on Jared’s fingers and gasped. It burned a little, but didn’t exactly hurt.
“You need to relax. When you relax, it doesn’t do anything but feel good,” Jared told him, and then he moved his fingers again, this time pressing upwards and stroking across something inside him. It was good, made him feel like he was ready to come, that intense moment just before everything lets go. Sucking on his cock, Jared slipped three fingers inside him, and moved them in and out. Jensen didn’t know what to do, press down onto the hand that was doing wonderful things to him, or fuck up into that hot sweet mouth.
“I’m gonna. . .oh fuck,” Jensen tried to pull Jared off his dick, but Jared just sucked back down on it, as his fingers pressed inside Jensen. Then he hummed, and it was all over. Balls tightening, Jensen felt his eyes rolling back into his head as he came. Jared didn’t stop, he swallowed and sucked, until it was just this side of painful, then he let Jensen go. Jensen pulled him up and kissed him, tasting himself on Jared’s tongue.
Jared slid his fingers out of Jensen, and got out the condom. Jensen watched as Jared rolled the condom over his cock, and then grabbed the lube and slicked it up. “Up,” Jared said, and moved so Jensen could get up. He told Jensen that, as much as he looked forward to fucking him face to face, this way (he got Jensen on his knees in front of him) would be more comfortable for the first time. Then he leaned down and, spreading Jensen’s cheeks, licked his hole again.
Jensen moaned and pressed back. Jared’s tongue should have a statue erected to it Jensen decided, as Jared licked around and in him. Jensen’s cock was starting to take notice as Jared kept it up. Then he shifted, and something large was pressing at his hole. “Try to push me out,” Jared directed him. Jensen did, and the head of Jared’s cock slipped inside him.
It burned a little, but it also felt good. Jensen could hear Jared panting behind him, and he’d never wished for a mirror before, to see himself during sex, but he really wanted to watch what was happening to him, to Jared. Slowly Jared pushed in, and Jensen could feel the cool lube easing the way. And fuck, Jared was big. Jensen felt like Jared’s dick was touching his stomach when he was all the way inside him. Just the thought of that big cock inside him made his ass clench. He moaned and Jared moaned. “Just move,” Jensen urged him.
It hurt, but it also felt really good. In this position, Jared’s cock slid across that place inside Jensen that Jared had hit with his fingers. Jensen’s dick, which had lost interest slightly, as Jared had put that huge piece of meat in him, was now starting to stand at attention again. Jared leaned on Jensen and mouthed the back of his neck, while his hand snaked around and gripped Jensen’s dick.
Relaxing, and just going with it, Jensen pushed back against Jared. Slowly, Jared began to move faster, and fuck into him harder. Then Jared slapped his hand down on Jensen’s bare ass. Holy. . . fuck. Jensen moaned, and he could almost feel Jared grinning at him. Jared slapped and squeezed his cheeks until they were very hot. Jensen’s face was hot too, but he wasn’t sure if it was because he had just been spanked while being fucked, or because being spanked had turned him on so much.
His hard cock was bouncing against his stomach, as Jared fucked him harder and harder. Jensen’s whole ass felt super sensitive. Every place Jared touched him felt good. Jared moaned and pushed all the way in, stilling. Jensen could feel his cock pulsing inside him as he came, and then, slowly, Jared pulled out. To Jensen, it felt as though something was missing, but then Jared wrapped his hand around Jensen’s cock, and slid his fingers over it. A couple of strokes, and he was coming.
Jared laughed at Jensen as he slipped out of bed. “Come on, shower,” Jared said, as Jensen tried to pretend to be asleep. Jared slapped his ass, and Jensen yelped.
“I’m tired, all fucked out for some reason,” Jensen said.
“You need to clean up, and I need to make sure I didn’t hurt you,” Jared explained.
Jensen cracked his eyes open. “What do I get?” he asked, joking.
“Breakfast in bed,” Jared said casually, too casually.
“You want me to stay the night?” Jensen sat up to look at Jared. He was serious.
“I want,” Jared paused and looked into Jensen’s face, “you to stay.” There was an unspoken word on the end of Jared sentence, but Jensen heard it anyway.
“I suppose I should move in. After all, you still have to show me everything,” Jensen said, watching Jared’s reaction. If he had misunderstood, he could just laugh and act like he was joking.
Jared grinned, and then smiled and then threw back his head and laughed. For quite a while. Jensen watched with a fond smile on his face. “Yeah,” Jared said after he got himself under control, “Everything is gonna take some time.”
Jensen stood up and kissed Jared, letting him lead them to the bathroom. Stopping, he looked into Jared’s face. “I hope it takes forever.”
Suddenly serious, Jared looked at him. “Forever is a long time. Nothing lasts forever.”
Jensen wanted to kick himself, Jared had probably said those words to Sandy, and look how that had ended. Lifting his hand to Jared’s face, he quirked his lips and nodded. “For as long as we work then. I. . .” Jensen was stopped by a hand over his mouth.
“Don’t say it,” Jared said.
“What?” Jensen asked. “That my come is drying on my chest, and I really want that shower now?”
Jared laughed again. “You just want to move in because I’ve got a bigger bathroom.”
“Ha, you figured me out,” Jensen said with a grin. They went in and shut the door behind them.
Everything would work out. Jensen knew he loved Jared, and he also knew Jared loved him. They were friends, and now lovers. How long it would last, only fate knew. But Jensen finally knew he was where he had dreamed of being, and he would work and struggle, and fight tooth and nail to keep it. He wasn’t going to live without trying, because Jared had shown him that that wasn’t living.
Author: gestaltrose aka chaosrosa
Title: I Just Can’t Help Falling
Pairing: Jared/Jensen
Rating: NC-17, if you are not old enough don't click
Word count: 4400 or so
Beta: The wonderful realscape (thank you *kisses*)and I messed with it after I got it back. Any and all mistakes are mine.
Warnings: slash, shmoop, fluff, sex sex sex, a little D/s
Disclaimer: All of this is made up. Fiction. None of it reflect anything that may or may not have happened between these two hot men. *nods*
Summary: There is a wedding and Jensen finds out something about Jared. (I suck at summaries - it’s good and pretty short. . .go read)
Notes: This was written for j2_spn_100days also as a gift fic for schnute23. I offered to write her a story. She said Pairing Jensen/Jared, a first time (at a wedding, some jealous Jared before the *cough* NC17)? *heee*. This was written pre-break up so I am not Sandy bashing or anything. Title taken from the Elvis Presley song.
Jensen stood, smiling, as Sandy McCoy married someone other than Jared Padalecki. When he’d received the invitation he’d jumped at the chance, knowing that Jared and Sandy had stayed good friends (since their breakup),and that she would be inviting him too. He’d gotten there early, and Sandy had insisted that he sit on her side, as since he was practically family . Agreeing, because he thought that Jared would be sitting there too. Jensen was, therefore, disappointed when Jared didn’t materialize.
Wandering around the reception, he was snagged by Sandy, and dragged off into a corner to meet Sam (yeah, Jensen knew what irony was), her very cute, very gay cousin. She giggled, and left them there. Jensen had had a couple of the champagne cocktails, and maybe he was disappointed that Jared hadn’t shown up, and yeah, this guy (Sam, Jensen still laughed in his head), was cute and flirting with him.
Maybe he leaned in to hear what the guy was saying, no matter that it apparently looked like he was about to kiss the guy. Feeling a large heavy hand land on his shoulder, he jerked and started to turn.
“You, leave.” Jensen heard a command snapped out above his shoulder. Jared, Jensen thought with relief. Sam just disappeared, and Jensen started to turn again, but he was pressed forward into the wall. “You will follow me,” Jared growled low in his ear, and Jensen felt a shiver roll down his spine. Having only heard Jared get mad once, the memory of the moment was stuck in Jensen’s brain.
Jensen had been working on set for about eighteen hours, Jared about twelve, and Robert had asked him to do one more take of Sam’s death scene. Knowing that he was wiped out, emotionally and physically, he tried to tell him no, but Robert said just one more take. Making it through the take, he was sobbing as Dean, and as Jensen, and Jared had known it. So when Bobby had said just a few more reaction shots, Jared was up off the ground, where he was being held in Jensen’s arms, and in Robert’s face. Telling the man in a low quiet voice that if he didn’t stop this now, he was walking. Jensen had watched as Jared’s jaw clenched, and he finally saw where Jared could pull some of Sam’s anger from. Jensen remembered that Bobby had looked surprised.
Jared had told the man to look at Jensen, who was trying to not be noticed at the time, still kneeling on the ground. Jensen had glanced up, his eyes red and swollen from crying, and Robert had called it a wrap. Trying to get to his feet, he’d suddenly been taken in hand, and almost picked up. Jared had asked him if he was okay about a thousand times on the way back to the lot, Jensen had been exhausted, but he still knew that was the moment everything changed. Jensen became a little obsessed with his co-star, he could admit it now. But watching and wanting from afar was something different than having him press you up against a wall in the middle of his ex-fiancé’s wedding party.
Jensen knew that Jared could be passionate and feel very strongly about things, a whole lot of things. He’d often wondered where Jared got all his passion from. Dreaming about it being directed at him was one thing, but willfully intruding on someone else’s relationship was something very different. Jared had had Sandy, and Jensen hadn’t been about to go there.
Never considering himself gay, he’d honestly had trouble wrapping his brain around how much he cared about Jared. No, that was a lie. He’d liked and cared about Jared almost from the first moment he’d met him. However, this was different. Now he wanted Jared all the time. Knowing that, although Jared might attack him on a regular basis, his friend was about a straight as one could get. So he’d buried his feelings, sure that they weren’t reciprocated, and he’d smiled and carried on.
Now, as he followed Jared across the busy dance floor, he admired how good his friend looked in a suit. He could feel his apprehension swirling in his gut as they wove around dancers, heading for the exit. Why was Jared mad at him? Had he said something bad to Sandy? Jensen knew he wasn’t that drunk; hell, he was hardly buzzed. Jared had walked out the door and kept on walking; Jensen almost sprinting to catch up with him.
Night had fallen at some point during the reception. Walking side by side, Jensen felt, more than saw, Jared drop into a matching stride, and he felt something loosen inside him. It was as if everything that had been wrong suddenly fell into place. Jared walked for a block and a half away from the hotel where Sandy’s reception was being held, and then turned into an alley. Jensen followed, curious as to where this was going, even though his brain still swirled around Jared’s anger.
Jensen found himself shoved up against a brick wall with Jared looming over him. Jared never loomed, always going out of his way to play down his height, but now Jensen needed to tip his head back to see him. Angry; why was Jared so angry? Catching his breath at the emotions that ran across Jared’s face, lit from one side by a streetlight, and from the other by an exit sign that glowed overhead, Jensen had little trouble making them out.
“You. . . what. . .” Jared was breathing like he’d just run a race. “Oh, fuck it,” he said, and leaned in closer to Jensen. Watching in amazement, Jensen parted his lips as Jared wrapped his fingers around Jensen’s face and tilted it up.
Kissing Jared was everything he had imagined it would be, and Jensen was really confused. Sure Jared had been the kind of friend who was all over you all the time but, as much as Jensen had longed for it, Jared had never come across as gay, or even bisexual. Jesus, he and Sandy had been an item as long as he’d known him. Jensen might have fantasized about Jared wanting him, but he’d never expected this.
Jared must have sensed something, because he pulled back and searched Jensen’s face, while Jensen searched his. Reaching up, Jensen pulled Jared back in and licked his way inside Jared’s mouth. Then Jensen was shoved against the wall, and Jared was pulling at his clothes. The light dimmed in the alleyway, as someone walked between it and the streetlight. “Come home with me,” Jared asked, or demanded, Jensen wasn’t quite sure, and he really didn’t care.
“Yeah,” he said, and before he’d finished speaking, Jared was practically dragging him down the alley. “It’s okay,” Jensen tried to calm him down. Jared seemed to listen eventually, and stopped pulling at him. Straightening his tux, Jensen brushed off some imaginary dirt and then, digging in his pocket, he found his ticket for the valet parking.
“Do you have a car?” he asked Jared.
“What?” Jared appeared a bit distracted.
“A car, do you have a car?” Jensen repeated.
“No,” Jared shook his head.
“Then how. . .” Jensen let his voice trail off, it didn’t matter how Jared had gotten to the wedding.
“Sandy,” Jared said, and Jensen felt a spike of jealousy, “sent a limo.”
He held out his ticket to the valet as they got to the hotel’s parking lot, and then waited. The guy pulled up in Jensen’s truck. He loved coming to these things in his pickup, if for no other reason than to see the expression of distaste that flashed across people’s faces. Jared slid into the passenger’s seat as Jensen tipped the valet and got in. Driving to Jared’s place wasn’t that difficult, Jensen had been there before. However, this time it was different. Jared was sitting beside him, his hand on the back of Jensen’s neck and Jensen had never been this turned on, ever.
Finally pulling up to Jared’s apartment complex, Jensen punched in the code and got through the security gate. Privacy was expensive in California, but after he and Sandy had broken up, Jared had gotten some really weird fan mail, and decided to move here. Jared got out and was opening the door. Jensen trailing behind like one of Jared’s puppies. Speaking of puppies, Jensen thought, just as Sadie and Harley came barreling out of the house.
Jared smiled, and Jensen’s heart clenched. He actually put a hand up to his chest, it hurt so bad. Jared played with his pups for a bit, then he coaxed them back inside. Jensen, meanwhile, had grabbed a couple of beers out of the fridge, and had taken them into Jared’s living room. Twisting the top off of one, he sat Jared’s on the coffee table.
Sometimes Jensen wondered if Jared ever changed anything. The living room setup was exactly the same as it had been in Vancouver. Sofa, loveseat, recliner, television, with gaming systems spread out in front of it. Hell, Jensen thought that even the books were in the same order. Taking a drink, Jensen got up to look at Jared’s bookshelves. As always, Jared’s range of interests astounded him. Jensen read some, sure. But nothing like Jared. There were cultural anthropology books next to astronomy books. Scanning some more, Jensen saw humor, horror, biographies; if it was written down in English, Jared had probably read it, or at least heard of it.
Hearing Jared getting the dogs settled in the laundry room, Jensen felt his stomach begin to tighten again. He had forgotten, or had let himself forget, what was going on. Jared walked into the room, Jensen nodded at him, and then at the beer on the table. Rolling his eyes (and why was that necessary? Jensen wondered) Jared picked up the beer and opened it. Jensen’s eyes widened as Jared chugged the whole thing in a few moments.
“Come here,” Jared said. It wasn’t a polite request; it was a demand and Jensen considered, for a moment, not doing it. However, it wasn’t as if he didn’t want to. So, Jensen got up and walked over to Jared, and tilted his head back a little to look him in the eyes.
Jared growled and pulled Jensen close. “God, do you know what you do to me?” Jensen shook his head, even though he did have a pretty good idea about what Jared was going through, because he was going through it too.
Both of them, having lost their jackets at some point, began pulling at the other’s shirt. Jensen hit skin first, which he thought was amazing, because Jared had to have on as many layers as his character Sam wore. Jared’s breath hissed as Jensen ran his fingers over Jared’s flat stomach. Jensen kissed Jared’s throat, sucking at where his pulse fluttered beneath the skin.
Jared must have got tired of fighting Jensen’s buttons, because he grabbed the bottom of his shirt and pulled, buttons flying off and scattering on the floor. Then there was a flurry of movement, and clothing was taken off between kisses and caresses. Sitting on the couch beside each other, Jensen took his boots off, and Jared slipped out of his dress shoes and pants.
Feeling awkward for the first time since Jared had entered the room, Jensen shifted on the couch, taking his pants off while not looking at Jared. Jared, however, didn’t give him much time for contemplation. Standing, he slid his underwear off, and Jensen stared, he couldn’t help it. He had seen Jared naked before, hell they had practically lived in each other’s pocket in Vancouver, and it had been worse on set. Personal space meant very little to Jared, Jensen had learned. But Jensen had never seen Jared with a hard on, and the man was big, long and thick. Jensen was speechless.
Picking up on Jensen’s unease, Jared sat down beside him and squeezed his knee. Jared ran his hand up Jensen’s leg. Jensen could feel the pads of Jared’s fingers tracing a pattern in his skin as they moved up his inner thigh, stopping just before touching his dick. Whimpering as Jared pulled his hand back, Jensen reached out and held Jared’s hip, trying to pull him closer.
Jared pulled back and looked down at him. “I like you like this,” his voice was that low rumble that always went straight to Jensen’s cock, “All needy. I’ll give you what you want. You just have to tell me what that is.” And with that Jared sat back on the couch. Jensen looked at him and realized his mouth was hanging open. Jared, naked and with a hard on, was sitting across from him on the couch, arms folded, just waiting. Fuck.
Jensen’s eyes dropped to Jared’s dick. Mouth watering, Jensen worked up his courage. “I want to taste you, suck you off.” Eyes flicked upwards to Jared face to see his reaction. Jared smiled, and spread his legs to let Jensen in between them.
“That wasn’t so hard, was it? Stop,” Jared put a hand on Jensen’s shoulder as he was moving toward him. Jensen blushed, thinking he was doing something wrong. “Take your underwear off.”
Oh, that was all. Jensen felt a flush begin at his belly and move outward, until he felt he was burning up. Standing, he slid his briefs off, and was surprised as Jared wrapped his hand around Jensen’s flagging erection. All the higher functions of Jensen’s brain shut down. Moving closer, he put his hands on Jared’s arms. Jared’s hand moved, and Jensen’s fingers tightened against his biceps. “You sure about this?” Jared asked, and Jensen pulled Jared’s hand away from his now hard cock, and pushed him back.
Laying back, with his legs spread wide, Jared smiled. and Jensen dropped to his knees and took Jared’s hard cock in his hand. The size of Jared still scared him a little, but Jensen licked at the pre come that had beaded on the end of his cock, and someone moaned. Jensen thought it might have been him, as he licked Jared’s dick again, his tongue dipping in the small opening, gathering Jared’s flavor. Opening wide, and trying to make sure his teeth didn’t scrape, he sucked the head of Jared’s cock into his mouth.
Jared was making appropriately appreciative noises as Jensen licked and sucked on his dick. Taking it into his mouth, he tried to see how much he could get in. Afew inches and he was gagging. Jensen backed off, swallowed, and tried again.
“It’s good, you don’t. . .” Jared’s voice trailed off, as Jensen managed to get him down further. Nobody had ever said Jensen wasn’t a quick learner. He still gagged a little as he backed off, then he licked the head again, and his mouth was filled with the tang of Jared’s pre come. Looking up at Jared, he was a bit shocked by the predatory look in his eyes. Jensen let Jared slip out of his mouth, and he was pulled up for a kiss.
Gasping as their cocks rubbed, Jared took advantage and plundered his mouth. Jensen tilted his head back as Jared kissed, licked, and bit his way down Jensen’s neck. That was going to leave a mark, he thought, as Jared sucked on his neck. He supposed it was a good thing he was taking a break before his next job hunting foray. Jared’s hand slipped between them and grasped both their cocks together.
“You’re thinking too much. I’m obviously doing something wrong,” Jared said, and squeezed a bit, before stroking their cocks together. Jensen pushed down against Jared, and he might have whimpered, but he wasn’t sure. Jared’s other hand slid up his thigh and grabbed his ass. This time, Jensen knew that he moaned. “You want more?” Jared asked, and Jensen’s eyes closed as he nodded.
Jared smacked his ass, and Jensen’s eyes flew open. “I told you you needed to ask,” Jared said, as he smoothed his hand over the spot where he’d just hit Jensen. Jensen pressed back against it, and Jared gave him a crooked smile. “Like that, huh?”
Jensen nodded, and Jared hit him again, palm flat against his ass. Jensen’s cock pressed up against Jared’s. It was getting wet with all the pre come leaking out of him. “Yes,” Jensen hissed.
“You have something to ask me?”
“More, please,” Jensen whispered.
Jared brought his hand down again. Jensen felt like his ass must be nearly glowing now. Smoothing his hand across Jensen’s hot skin again, Jared kissed him. Feeling more and more desperate, Jensen kissed him back. Jared calmed him, slowing things down. Breaking the kiss off, Jared moved a little to let Jensen know that he wanted him to move. Getting off Jared, Jensen stood for a moment, feeling his unease coming back. What if he screwed thing up? What if he sucked, and not in a good way, in bed? What if… what if… Jensen was brought back to the moment by another swat on his ass.
“Stay with me,” Jared said, and took his hand, leading him to the bedroom. Jared’s bedroom. With Jared’s bed. Jensen stared at it, and Jared sat down and pulled him between his legs. “We don’t have to do this. We don’t have to do anything you don’t want to.” He looked into Jensen face, and it was then that Jensen knew that, no matter how self assured Jared acted; he was just as uncertain about where this was going as Jensen was.
Making up his mind, Jensen ran his fingers across Jared’s cheeks, and up into his messy hair, as he leaned down and kissed him. “I want to,” he said into his lips. “I want everything.”
Jared smiled broadly, dimples showing. “Some things I can do tonight, everything might take a while.”
“Good,” Jensen said, reaching down and stroking Jared’s cock. “Take as long as you’d like.”
Jared growled, and pulled Jensen to him, before flipping them over and settling between Jensen’s legs. “Right now, I wanna be inside you.”
Jensen felt his balls tighten up at the suggestion, his cock bobbing and brushing against Jared’s stomach. Jared moved, urging Jensen to move up to the head of the bed. Getting out lube and condoms, he set them on the bed within reach, and then he bent down and took Jensen’s cock in his mouth. Jared obviously knew what he was doing as he took Jensen in all the way down to the base. “Uug,” Jensen made an incoherent noise.
Jared looked up, and Jensen nearly came right then. Jared’s mouth was stretched around his cock, his hazel green eyes looking up at him. Fuck. Jensen let his head drop back on the bed, and Jared hummed. He couldn’t stop his hips from jerking upwards into the moist, hot heat of Jared’s mouth, but Jared didn’t seem to mind. Instead, he felt something cold and wet pressing against his asshole. Jared’s finger, slick with lube circled and pressed, not quite hard enough to breach the ring of muscle.
It felt good, and then Jared’s tongue was licking around his hole and, holy fuck, who knew that felt that fucking good? Jared did, obviously, because he just responded to Jensen’s gasps with more tongue. Then he moved back to Jensen’s dick, sucking on him, as his finger breached Jensen. Honestly, he was a little surprised that it didn’t hurt, but it didn’t; it felt really really good. Jared fucked him with one finger, and then added a second. He licked up Jensen’s chest, fingers buried in his ass, and then he bit down on his nipple. Jensen tightened down on Jared’s fingers and gasped. It burned a little, but didn’t exactly hurt.
“You need to relax. When you relax, it doesn’t do anything but feel good,” Jared told him, and then he moved his fingers again, this time pressing upwards and stroking across something inside him. It was good, made him feel like he was ready to come, that intense moment just before everything lets go. Sucking on his cock, Jared slipped three fingers inside him, and moved them in and out. Jensen didn’t know what to do, press down onto the hand that was doing wonderful things to him, or fuck up into that hot sweet mouth.
“I’m gonna. . .oh fuck,” Jensen tried to pull Jared off his dick, but Jared just sucked back down on it, as his fingers pressed inside Jensen. Then he hummed, and it was all over. Balls tightening, Jensen felt his eyes rolling back into his head as he came. Jared didn’t stop, he swallowed and sucked, until it was just this side of painful, then he let Jensen go. Jensen pulled him up and kissed him, tasting himself on Jared’s tongue.
Jared slid his fingers out of Jensen, and got out the condom. Jensen watched as Jared rolled the condom over his cock, and then grabbed the lube and slicked it up. “Up,” Jared said, and moved so Jensen could get up. He told Jensen that, as much as he looked forward to fucking him face to face, this way (he got Jensen on his knees in front of him) would be more comfortable for the first time. Then he leaned down and, spreading Jensen’s cheeks, licked his hole again.
Jensen moaned and pressed back. Jared’s tongue should have a statue erected to it Jensen decided, as Jared licked around and in him. Jensen’s cock was starting to take notice as Jared kept it up. Then he shifted, and something large was pressing at his hole. “Try to push me out,” Jared directed him. Jensen did, and the head of Jared’s cock slipped inside him.
It burned a little, but it also felt good. Jensen could hear Jared panting behind him, and he’d never wished for a mirror before, to see himself during sex, but he really wanted to watch what was happening to him, to Jared. Slowly Jared pushed in, and Jensen could feel the cool lube easing the way. And fuck, Jared was big. Jensen felt like Jared’s dick was touching his stomach when he was all the way inside him. Just the thought of that big cock inside him made his ass clench. He moaned and Jared moaned. “Just move,” Jensen urged him.
It hurt, but it also felt really good. In this position, Jared’s cock slid across that place inside Jensen that Jared had hit with his fingers. Jensen’s dick, which had lost interest slightly, as Jared had put that huge piece of meat in him, was now starting to stand at attention again. Jared leaned on Jensen and mouthed the back of his neck, while his hand snaked around and gripped Jensen’s dick.
Relaxing, and just going with it, Jensen pushed back against Jared. Slowly, Jared began to move faster, and fuck into him harder. Then Jared slapped his hand down on Jensen’s bare ass. Holy. . . fuck. Jensen moaned, and he could almost feel Jared grinning at him. Jared slapped and squeezed his cheeks until they were very hot. Jensen’s face was hot too, but he wasn’t sure if it was because he had just been spanked while being fucked, or because being spanked had turned him on so much.
His hard cock was bouncing against his stomach, as Jared fucked him harder and harder. Jensen’s whole ass felt super sensitive. Every place Jared touched him felt good. Jared moaned and pushed all the way in, stilling. Jensen could feel his cock pulsing inside him as he came, and then, slowly, Jared pulled out. To Jensen, it felt as though something was missing, but then Jared wrapped his hand around Jensen’s cock, and slid his fingers over it. A couple of strokes, and he was coming.
Jared laughed at Jensen as he slipped out of bed. “Come on, shower,” Jared said, as Jensen tried to pretend to be asleep. Jared slapped his ass, and Jensen yelped.
“I’m tired, all fucked out for some reason,” Jensen said.
“You need to clean up, and I need to make sure I didn’t hurt you,” Jared explained.
Jensen cracked his eyes open. “What do I get?” he asked, joking.
“Breakfast in bed,” Jared said casually, too casually.
“You want me to stay the night?” Jensen sat up to look at Jared. He was serious.
“I want,” Jared paused and looked into Jensen’s face, “you to stay.” There was an unspoken word on the end of Jared sentence, but Jensen heard it anyway.
“I suppose I should move in. After all, you still have to show me everything,” Jensen said, watching Jared’s reaction. If he had misunderstood, he could just laugh and act like he was joking.
Jared grinned, and then smiled and then threw back his head and laughed. For quite a while. Jensen watched with a fond smile on his face. “Yeah,” Jared said after he got himself under control, “Everything is gonna take some time.”
Jensen stood up and kissed Jared, letting him lead them to the bathroom. Stopping, he looked into Jared’s face. “I hope it takes forever.”
Suddenly serious, Jared looked at him. “Forever is a long time. Nothing lasts forever.”
Jensen wanted to kick himself, Jared had probably said those words to Sandy, and look how that had ended. Lifting his hand to Jared’s face, he quirked his lips and nodded. “For as long as we work then. I. . .” Jensen was stopped by a hand over his mouth.
“Don’t say it,” Jared said.
“What?” Jensen asked. “That my come is drying on my chest, and I really want that shower now?”
Jared laughed again. “You just want to move in because I’ve got a bigger bathroom.”
“Ha, you figured me out,” Jensen said with a grin. They went in and shut the door behind them.
Everything would work out. Jensen knew he loved Jared, and he also knew Jared loved him. They were friends, and now lovers. How long it would last, only fate knew. But Jensen finally knew he was where he had dreamed of being, and he would work and struggle, and fight tooth and nail to keep it. He wasn’t going to live without trying, because Jared had shown him that that wasn’t living.