Never Letting Go - RPS - Hawaii-Five-O
title: Never Letting Go
author: germanjj
words: 1000
genre: RPS, Hawaii-Five-O, pre-slash
no beta
summary: Alex is back.
note #1: I have to admit, I'm a little scared to post this. But I just had to write something about this. Alex checking himself in to rehab worried me more than I ever expected. So... *hands*
note #2: the comment about Alex missing his "glow" is actually from a friend of mine. the last episode before we got the news about Alex, she texted me that something looked off about him. That she though he looked pale.
go here for AO3
Alex is on set full thirty minutes before Scott actually sees him. But Scott knows he's back the minute he arrives. The mood on set changes instantly, everyone feels it, everyone letting out the breath it seemed they had been collectively holding. He watches half the crew disappear while he's wrapping the last scene of the day; he hears them laugh and cheer, sees them hug out of the corner of his eyes.
Scott doesn't leave to join them. He finishes his scene, then watches Grace bounce off to welcome Alex back to set. The sound guys pack their stuff faster than Scott is able to get out of Danny's headspace and get his water bottle, the camera crew is gone before Scott has even left the set; it's all becoming a small welcome back party very fast.
They're done for the day. Scott packs up his things and walks right over to the make-up trailer. He doesn't need the girls to get the stuff off his face, but he hates it and has to do it right away or he'll feel dirty and sweaty all over the next few hours.
He takes a shower after that. Changes back into his street clothes, neatly folded and waiting for him in his trailer. He follows his usual routine, not batting an eyelash when he hears Alex's laugh among the crowd.
It was weird, starting the last days without Alex. Having lunch without him sitting right next to him. Sure, it's not like they have exactly the same working hours all the time, but Scott is used to Alex being around him most of the day. He likes it.
Although the work is over for the day, nobody's leaving yet. Alex is only visiting, work will start the next day for him, but everyone is happy to have him back, relieved. But they're also a little afraid. That things might have changed, that Alex isn't as better as they hoped. Scott didn't need to talk to anyone about that, he just knows. It's been hanging in the air ever since they knew when Alex was gonna be back.
Scott switches the lights off in his trailer. He has his bag around his shoulder, his jacket in his hand. When he steps out of his trailer, he sees Daniel with Alex a few feet away.
Alex looks good. Real good. Before he left, there had been something missing. The ... glow on his face, the light. Back then, Scott had looked at him and for a moment, every now and then, Alex had looked like he was slowly fading away .
Scott is looking at him now, maybe even staring, but he doesn't care. The glow is back and Scott takes a deep breath, stops in his tracks.
Alex and Daniel turn around as they notice him, Daniel smiling, then ducking his head and backing away, walking over to where the rest of the crew.
Alex looks right at Scott, a tentative smile crossing his face.
"Hey."
"Hey." Scott doesn't make a step to greet the other man, but he puts down his bag and jacket, watching Alex as he slowly walks over.
"How was shooting today?" Alex asks as if that's the important question. As if he's just had a couple of days off.
As if Scott does even remember right now.
He doesn't answer. He keeps looking at Alex, doesn't seem to be able to look away, doesn't want to. He studies the familiar features. Afraid to find something he doesn't like, and his heart is beating rapidly in his chest.
And then Alex is right in front of him, hesitating.
"You look good," Scott says, which is an understatement but still true, and Alex ducks his head, just like Daniel did, and smiles.
"Come here." This time it's Scott who moves, stretching out his arms to pull his friend into a hug.
Alex goes willingly, bending down to return it.
Alex feels good, warm and real, smells good too. Scott closes his eyes.
It's a greeting at first, a normal hug, friendly and casual, just like they've done a million times before. But when it's time to pull back and Alex moves in his arms, Scott doesn't let him go.
In fact, he even presses closer, his chest tightening so much that he feels like only having Alex closer will make it go away.
Alex tenses, doesn't move any further, but Scott can feel him holding his breath, waiting.
For Scott to push him away or for him to start making a joke of it, Scott doesn't know. But what he does is turning his head a little, burying his nose in Alex's neck and forgetting about the polite hug between guys where you turn your faces as far away from each other as possible.
Scott is clinging to him, wrapping his hands tightly around the other man's body, and he still has his eyes closed, breathing in through his nose, taking in Alex's scent, musky and clean.
If he would care, if he would listen, Scott would notice how it's growing quiet around them. The crew and Daniel, Grace and Masi are silently leaving, one by one, heading over to the catering tent.
Scott doesn't notice. He's hugging Alex like he's not ever planning to let go, and finally Alex reacts. He relaxes into the embrace, moves his head just the same way Scott did, and now Scott can feel Alex's lips on his neck, his breathing hitting the skin. He's wrapping his arms tight around Scott's body. One arm around his shoulder, the other curling around Scott's waist, and it feels good, feels right. He can feel Alex's heart beating right against his chest.
"You're scaring me," Alex whispers into his skin and presses his shoulder. It's the wrong way around, like Scott needs the comfort and not Alex.
Scott chuckles when he can breathe again, the movement traveling in the tight space between their bodies.
"I'm scaring you, huh?"