this el jay was inspired by natasha rachel doss....i <3 you!!!!!
today i was about to got my car and i notice some glass on my passenger seat. i look up and see my window is shattered...i look to the left and see that my faceplate is gone. but only my faceplate. then i open the door, and look for my cds(including my big case)...so of course that is gone too. so my cd's and my faceplate were stolen. fantastic...that was every cd i ever bought. ever...i feel like a part of me was gone, that had to be over 600 bucks of cds. and i cant afford a new faceplate, so no music in the car. its also rad that i have a cardboard/duct tape window. My father said that I need to be more responsible with my belongings. I'm sorry, I don't expect my cd's/faceplate to get stolen in a university parking garage, so I kind of got really pissed at him and he got pretty pissed to. he says that whenever we talk, i get really defensive but of course i'm going to get defensive when he is telling me to be more responsible when someone broke my window and broke into my car. how am i supposed to control that, i listen to music in my car...there are going to be cd's in there. that totally pissed me off...bleh
then i talked to my dad about school, which is always a great thing to talk about. i dont think my parents enjoyed the idea of me dropping my graphic design major, as they want me to stick with it. Unfortunantly i can't just stick with it because i found out that art just really isn't me, and to force art isn't really art. I feel that if i'm not 100% into the subject, why should I keep going on with it and be miserable. Sure, all the pre req classes are bullshit and really suck, but my mild passion for art has diminished completly. I think they like the idea of me wanting to get into recording, but i don't know if they like the idea of me wanting to make music my life. That is something i'm 100% dedicated to and will always have a passion for. I love writing and music is my life. I know they just want me to be happy, but my father really just wants me to be able to get a job where i can support a wife and kids. Well, i'm only 18 and I really don't know what i want to do with my life. I want it to be with music of course. I will just take everything one day at a time. I don't even know where i'm going to school next year or if I even am going to school. My dad says that I will have to take out student loans, which is bullshit for sure. If i'm not dedicated to school, i don't feel its necessary to put myself so far in debt to get a minimal education. I need to talk to my academic advisor.
On a lighter note...
Acceptance was absolutely amazing on tuesday. They caught us singing the new songs, oops
Dead Poetic was good but the singer was bad...he must have been sick. that was slightly disappointing since i hadn't seen them before.
I've been writing songs like crazy lately and I like how they are sounding. I'm exciting to finally be able to play with Ande during break. I want to get all of the songs completly written badly.
I'm sleeping at my old house this weekend, i miss my bed and during thanksgiving break, i'm getting it...
I'm also really stoked for everyone to come home, seriously it will be so rad having everyone together.
note to self : must work on money management skills; no more buying cds ; go on more walks and take pictures
then i talked to my dad about school, which is always a great thing to talk about. i dont think my parents enjoyed the idea of me dropping my graphic design major, as they want me to stick with it. Unfortunantly i can't just stick with it because i found out that art just really isn't me, and to force art isn't really art. I feel that if i'm not 100% into the subject, why should I keep going on with it and be miserable. Sure, all the pre req classes are bullshit and really suck, but my mild passion for art has diminished completly. I think they like the idea of me wanting to get into recording, but i don't know if they like the idea of me wanting to make music my life. That is something i'm 100% dedicated to and will always have a passion for. I love writing and music is my life. I know they just want me to be happy, but my father really just wants me to be able to get a job where i can support a wife and kids. Well, i'm only 18 and I really don't know what i want to do with my life. I want it to be with music of course. I will just take everything one day at a time. I don't even know where i'm going to school next year or if I even am going to school. My dad says that I will have to take out student loans, which is bullshit for sure. If i'm not dedicated to school, i don't feel its necessary to put myself so far in debt to get a minimal education. I need to talk to my academic advisor.
On a lighter note...
Acceptance was absolutely amazing on tuesday. They caught us singing the new songs, oops
Dead Poetic was good but the singer was bad...he must have been sick. that was slightly disappointing since i hadn't seen them before.
I've been writing songs like crazy lately and I like how they are sounding. I'm exciting to finally be able to play with Ande during break. I want to get all of the songs completly written badly.
I'm sleeping at my old house this weekend, i miss my bed and during thanksgiving break, i'm getting it...
I'm also really stoked for everyone to come home, seriously it will be so rad having everyone together.
note to self : must work on money management skills; no more buying cds ; go on more walks and take pictures