On BL, friends and cosplaying
Recent internet surfing and forum lurking has made me think about some stuff. There's a thread in the bl drama forum on coming out to RL friends about our love of BL... and from the responses in that thread (and some other threads in the forum), it seems like being open about our interest in BL is a rarity.
I remember when I first stumbled into BL... It was Gundam Wing fanfiction that hooked me (all those weird numbers, ya know) and I was 13 years old, still young and pure-minded (k, don't argue with me on this *STARES AT SOME PEOPLE*). Though I live in Malaysia (a country that's still rather conservative on MANY THINGS), I did not hesitate to share what I found and enjoyed. I did not receive any derisive comments and my friends were still my friends. I did not shout it out from rooftops but I did not hide it either. I did hide it from my parents,... but that was common sense. xD I have never worried about how other people will perceive me if/when they know I like BL. It has never even crossed my mind to do so.
In form 3 (I was 14), I was printing slash fics and sharing it with my classmates.
In form 6, I was having a discussion on gay porn with my classmates.
I've never denied it and it has never given me any trouble... so it was an eye-opener to see just how many people do not feel safe to like what they like openly. Friendships and love broken due to a person's inability to respect another person's harmless interest is ... terrible. I have never been in that situation before, but with my bad temper, I think I would have lashed out and yelled a lot. -_-; Such fragile friendship and love... is it even worth having?
I'm glad it has never happened to me... but I feel for the people who has the misfortune of experiencing it.
Another issue I've noticed in another forum is on cosplay and the public's negative perception of it. Much have been said about this issue, such as: Is it right/okay to cosplay whenever you feel like it? Why is there such a negative perception on cosplay among Malaysians? and OTHER IMPORTANT MATTERS... which I can't remember and can't refer to because the forum is down. xD
This is an opinion from a non-cosplayer. Though you can argue "but you won't understand it if you have never cosplayed!" ... the same could be said about the public. So, maybe I can be taken as a middle ground... somewhere between the uninformed public and the cosplayers. Personally, I have my reasons for not cosplaying but I appreciate a good cosplay and I don't find it weird probably because I'm exposed to the culture. Cosplaying is a minority of a select minority group in Malaysia.. which means the visibility of cosplayers are higher and people will be looking at them and will make judgments based on how they bring themselves. As they are representing a double minority group, every action they do will reflect on the group as a whole, and people love generalizing. It's called mental heuristics and we do it all the time. Human nature, etc etc.
So, the first question: Is it right/okay to cosplay whenever you feel like it? Some have said that it's done out of passion. Some people collect stamps/stickers/first day covers and they do it anywhere anytime they want. Why can't cosplayers cosplay whenever they want? It's a case of apples and oranges. Collecting stamps does not attract attention. Cosplaying does. In fact, wearing something slightly weird will get you weird looks. "Why care what other people think? They can think whatever they want. It doesn't affect me!" But it will affect everyone who cosplays so in the end, yes, it will affect you. So, cosplaying when there's no occasion for it? I don't agree with it... Be patient, wait until there's more public acceptance and then you can do whatever you want. Going to lunch in your outfits after an event or photoshoot is different than randomly going out to malls in your cosplay outfit.
Just don't cosplay to Bon Odori and make a fool out of yourself and embarrass us. Learn the context of a certain event before cosplaying.
Linked to the above... Why is there such a negative perception on cosplaying in Malaysia? It's not something that is widely understood and people are people and will jump to conclusions. If you act inappropriately, then you're just giving people more reasons to think badly of it and generalize. In time, if all cosplayers act in decorum, there will be more understanding and acceptance... Don't fight force with force. Don't deny it. Don't act nonchalant to it. Understand them and where they come from. One day, perhaps they will understand you or at least try to accept. If you shun them because they don't understand/accept your hobby/passion, the public and the cosplayers will never meet in the middle.
orz tl;dr post.
Uh, yeah. My thoughts on BL and cosplaying.
I remember when I first stumbled into BL... It was Gundam Wing fanfiction that hooked me (all those weird numbers, ya know) and I was 13 years old, still young and pure-minded (k, don't argue with me on this *STARES AT SOME PEOPLE*). Though I live in Malaysia (a country that's still rather conservative on MANY THINGS), I did not hesitate to share what I found and enjoyed. I did not receive any derisive comments and my friends were still my friends. I did not shout it out from rooftops but I did not hide it either. I did hide it from my parents,... but that was common sense. xD I have never worried about how other people will perceive me if/when they know I like BL. It has never even crossed my mind to do so.
In form 3 (I was 14), I was printing slash fics and sharing it with my classmates.
In form 6, I was having a discussion on gay porn with my classmates.
I've never denied it and it has never given me any trouble... so it was an eye-opener to see just how many people do not feel safe to like what they like openly. Friendships and love broken due to a person's inability to respect another person's harmless interest is ... terrible. I have never been in that situation before, but with my bad temper, I think I would have lashed out and yelled a lot. -_-; Such fragile friendship and love... is it even worth having?
I'm glad it has never happened to me... but I feel for the people who has the misfortune of experiencing it.
Another issue I've noticed in another forum is on cosplay and the public's negative perception of it. Much have been said about this issue, such as: Is it right/okay to cosplay whenever you feel like it? Why is there such a negative perception on cosplay among Malaysians? and OTHER IMPORTANT MATTERS... which I can't remember and can't refer to because the forum is down. xD
This is an opinion from a non-cosplayer. Though you can argue "but you won't understand it if you have never cosplayed!" ... the same could be said about the public. So, maybe I can be taken as a middle ground... somewhere between the uninformed public and the cosplayers. Personally, I have my reasons for not cosplaying but I appreciate a good cosplay and I don't find it weird probably because I'm exposed to the culture. Cosplaying is a minority of a select minority group in Malaysia.. which means the visibility of cosplayers are higher and people will be looking at them and will make judgments based on how they bring themselves. As they are representing a double minority group, every action they do will reflect on the group as a whole, and people love generalizing. It's called mental heuristics and we do it all the time. Human nature, etc etc.
So, the first question: Is it right/okay to cosplay whenever you feel like it? Some have said that it's done out of passion. Some people collect stamps/stickers/first day covers and they do it anywhere anytime they want. Why can't cosplayers cosplay whenever they want? It's a case of apples and oranges. Collecting stamps does not attract attention. Cosplaying does. In fact, wearing something slightly weird will get you weird looks. "Why care what other people think? They can think whatever they want. It doesn't affect me!" But it will affect everyone who cosplays so in the end, yes, it will affect you. So, cosplaying when there's no occasion for it? I don't agree with it... Be patient, wait until there's more public acceptance and then you can do whatever you want. Going to lunch in your outfits after an event or photoshoot is different than randomly going out to malls in your cosplay outfit.
Just don't cosplay to Bon Odori and make a fool out of yourself and embarrass us. Learn the context of a certain event before cosplaying.
Linked to the above... Why is there such a negative perception on cosplaying in Malaysia? It's not something that is widely understood and people are people and will jump to conclusions. If you act inappropriately, then you're just giving people more reasons to think badly of it and generalize. In time, if all cosplayers act in decorum, there will be more understanding and acceptance... Don't fight force with force. Don't deny it. Don't act nonchalant to it. Understand them and where they come from. One day, perhaps they will understand you or at least try to accept. If you shun them because they don't understand/accept your hobby/passion, the public and the cosplayers will never meet in the middle.
orz tl;dr post.
Uh, yeah. My thoughts on BL and cosplaying.