"Five Reasons Why Sam Dreams of Jell-O," SG-1
Another response to My Five Things Meme! replicarter22 asked for "Five Reasons Why Sam Dreams of Jell-O." This one is a little longer than the others at 2,205 words. I blame it all on #3. It got out of my control. ;-D
1. Hypnotized
Sam and Janet were seated across from each other at the dark kitchen table. The only light came from the orange bulb over the oven. Janet was already in her shorts and t-shirt but Sam was still in her jeans and blouse. She had nearly finished her Jell-O when she glanced over and got hypnotized by what Janet was doing.
Her spoon dipped through the whipped topping and came up with a sliver of orange. Janet never took the blue; the blue was Sam's and Janet respected that. Orange was just as good, she promised Sam. She turned her hand and closed her mouth around the cup of the spoon. She dragged it back out, the sterling silver cup now smeared with orange and white streaks.
Janet turned the spoon upright so it looked like a thin man with an oval head. She tilted her head to the side and stuck her tongue out, tracing over the curve of the cup and smacking her lips. She repeated the process on the back of the spoon and touched the corner of her mouth with the tip of her tongue. She hesitated when she saw the scrutiny she was under. "What?"
"You got a little something..." Sam said, snapped from her hypnosis. She stood and came around the edge of the table. Janet leaned back as Sam straddled her and bent down. She licked the corner of Janet's mouth and then captured her bottom lip with her teeth.
When the kiss broke, Janet said, "Did you get it?"
"Get what?" Sam asked, her face still hovering in front of Janet's.
"Whatever you saw on my lip."
Sam laughed. "Oh, honey, there was nothing on your lip."
"Oh," Janet said. She pecked Sam's lips and slid her hands under the hem of Sam's shirt. "Well. Then I think I saw something on your thigh earlier..."
"Oh?"
"Oh," Janet whispered.
2. Sick Day
Sam shuddered, coughed and rolled onto her side. Feeling sick was one thing. Feeling sick, she could handle. But sick and missing school? It was a Monday. She hadn't been to school for three whole days. She sniffled, covered her face with a Kleenex and blew. She dropped the Kleenex into the pile and hugged her pillow as she thought about the lessons she was missing. Right now, she'd have been in Ms. Dubacek's Science class. How she hated to miss that!
Her bedroom door opened and Sam rolled onto her back. "I'm feeling better," she said. "I can go half-a-day."
"No," Beverly Carter chided. She sat on the edge of Sam's bed and pressed the back of her hand against Sam's forehead. Her fingers were long, thin and like pieces of ice against Sam's flesh. "I hate to tell you, kiddo, but you may have to camp out tomorrow, too."
"Noooo," Sam said in a whiny, penitent voice that only children and small dogs can pull off. "I'm feeling be-etter-r."
"Sam..."
Sam groaned and closed her eyes.
Beverly bent down and picked up the tray she'd carried in with her. "Here. This should cheer you up. Blue Jell-O."
Sam took the cup and grimaced at it. It was the only thing she could keep down, but she'd gotten her fill of it since Saturday when she first started feeling ill. Still, she took the spoon and took a bite. As she was distracted, her mother pulled a leather book bag towards the bed. "Oh, and when I went to the store to get some more Jell-O, I ran into one of your teachers."
She withdrew the thick Science book and a stapled sheaf of papers. "Your homework, madam."
Sam nearly dropped her Jell-O in her haste to grab the books. "Oh, thank you, Mom, thank you!"
Beverly laughed as Sam pressed a blue-smeared kiss on her cheek. "You just promise not to overdo it. I'll come up and check on you around lunchtime. Chicken noodle or just broth?"
"Chicken noodle," Sam replied, already flipping through her science book to find the chapter they were on. Her mother left and Sam started reading. For the first time all weekend, she actually felt good. She took another bite of blue Jell-O - the snack that would follow her through the rest of her life as a pick-me-up reminder of this day - and read about neutrons.
3. Battle On
"I have read of a place where humans do battle in a ring of Jell-O." - Teal'c
Jack O'Neill dropped into his seat and handed Teal'c the popcorn. "I'm telling ya, T, this place has got it all. Beer, women, darts, women..."
"Are you listing each individual woman, O'Neill?" Teal'c asked.
A woman in a Metallic t-shirt and ripped blue jeans walked past, smiling at them both as she sashayed up the aisle.
"Yes, I am," Jack said, turning to follow her progress. "Come on, Teal'c. What better way to unwind after a long, harrowing mission than with some utterly mindless entertainment?"
Teal'c remained silent, but seemed dubious.
"Ladies and gentlemen," the announcer said over the loudspeaker, "if there are any ladies or gentlemen in attendance that is...! It's time for our main event! Tonight's battling babes... the raaaaaaaavishing Amazon!!" The curtain pulled back to reveal a slim woman in a brown bikini. Her black hair was wild, her face covered by a lion's head mask. She played up to the crowd, who were jeering her.
"And her opponent! The Laaaaady Einstein!" The curtains parted again and a smaller woman stepped out. She was wearing glasses big enough to obscure most of her face, the mustache covering the rest. Her hair was covered by a thick Einstein wig and the crowd erupted in applause as she stepped out.
She was wearing a lab jacket over her blue bikini and a pair of army boots completed the ensemble. Teal'c raised an eyebrow at the sight, but said nothing.
The swimming pool - easily triple the size one would find in a kid's backyard - was pulled out to center stage by two bikini-clad beauties. It was filled to the brim with blue Jell-O. "God bless America," Jack muttered.
The Amazon and Lady Einstein moved to the edges of the pool and made threatening gestures to one another. The Amazon stepped into the ring first and Lady Einstein joined her a few seconds later. They found their footing in the Jell-O and Lady Einstein whipped off her jacket.
They began to grapple, holding each other's arms just above the elbow. The Amazon tripped Lady Einstein into the pool of blue cubes and pounced on her. The crowd erupted. When Lady Einstein stood, she adjusted her wig and a few sprigs of blonde hair peeked out from beneath it.
Jack scoffed and nearly choked on his popcorn. "That kind of looks like..." He looked over at Teal'c, who was sitting erect in his chair. Jack's smile faded. "What...? You think so, too?"
Lady Einstein put her arm under the Amazon's and lifted it around to cup the back of her head. The Amazon struggled, but her arm was pinned. "I believe I have seen Major Carter perform the same maneuver," Teal'c said.
Jack put down his popcorn and grabbed his cell phone. He dialed Carter's house and waited patiently for her to answer. "Not home... or not answering." He stood, kicking over his popcorn as he stepped into the aisle. "Come on. Let's go see if she answers the door."
"If she does not?" Teal'c asked as he followed Jack up the aisle.
"Then we come back here and talk to Lady Einstein."
---
Jack's tires squealed as he came to a stop outside of Carter's house. He and Teal'c nearly leapt the little wrought-iron gate closing off the hedge and ran up the front walk. "She'll be here," Jack said. "She'll be here."
Teal'c knocked on the door and they stepped back. Ten seconds... then twenty. He was about to knock again when the door swung open and Sam looked at them. "Hold on," she said into her phone. She rested it against her shoulder and said, "Guys, we just got back. I don't want to watch the Empire Strikes Back again..."
"No, uh," Jack said, glancing at Teal'c. "We... just wanted to see if you were home. You have call waiting?"
"Yeah," Sam said. She looked at Teal'c. "Why did you want to see if I was home?"
Jack hesitated and Teal'c said, "Daniel Jackson believed he saw you involved in a car accident downtown. We were closer and assured him we were close enough to ensure you were safe at home."
Jack looked at the phone on Sam's shoulder. 'Please don't be talking to Daniel. Please don't be talking to...'
"Oh," Sam said. "That's sweet. I'm... fine, guys. Really."
"Sure?" Jack said.
"Sure," Sam smiled. "No car accidents in recent memory."
Jack nodded. "All right. I was sure it was nothing, but... you know Teal'c. Always the mother hen."
"Right," Sam nodded. "Well. I should..." she gestured with the phone.
"Right," Jack said. "See you tomorrow, Carter."
---
She watched them walk through the gate before she put the phone to her ear again. "Sorry about that. A couple of guys I work with." She sighed and checked her watch. "So... yeah. Tell Tanya thank you for covering for me. I should be there for the 7:45 show. Oh, and tell the Amazon I'm gonna kick her ass all over that ring."
4. Sweet Dreams
Janet giggled and covered her mouth.
"No giggling," Sam admonished. "You're making it shake."
"Sorry," Janet said. "Sorry. But it's cold!"
"I know," Sam said. She sat up and examined the tower on Janet's midsection. The blue Jell-O squares were perfectly aligned to keep them from sliding down her hips and onto the mattress. A towel had been put under Janet's hips to protect the sheets. Sam picked up the whipped cream can and shook it. "You ready?"
"Yep," Janet nodded.
Sam added the whipped topping to the Jell-O, then added two dabs to Janet's nipples. She licked her lips. "Hurry," Janet giggled, covering her mouth and squeezing her eyes shut. "Hurry! It's so damn cold!"
Sam closed her lips around one white-peaked nipple and sucked up the topping. Janet moaned at the sensation and gasped when Sam blew across the cold, erect nipple. "Ooh," Janet sighed. Sam repeated the move on the other breast and licked her lips. "Now... the main course..."
---
Janet smacked Sam on the side of the head. Sam yelped and opened her eyes. She'd fallen asleep on the couch, her head in Janet's lap. She blinked blearily and realized she'd unbuttoned the bottom of Janet's blouse and had been sucking on her belly. She looked up into Janet's beet-red face and looked around the room.
Cassandra and Dominic were curled on the love seat, while Daniel was sprawled on the floor in front of the TV. Jack and Teal'c were in the armchairs; Jack was asleep and Teal'c was focused intently on the screen.
Sam sat up and folded Janet's shirt back into place. She bit her bottom lip and stood, moving as quietly as possible into the kitchen. When she returned, she was carrying a can of whipped cream and a bowl of Jell-O. No one but Janet paid any attention to her as she crossed through the living room and disappeared upstairs.
When Sam returned, Janet frowned and mouthed, 'What?'
Sam patted Janet's thigh and leaned in to whisper, "Sweet dreams."
Janet looked confused, but smiled and slipped her hand over Sam's thigh.
5. Every Kid's Favorite
Cassandra had barely touched her hot dog. She turned down chicken nuggets, pizza and ice cream. She just stared at the wall and refused to budge. Sam finally came in with two glasses full of Jell-O and placed one in front of the young girl. Cassie stared at it with the same enthusiasm as she had the other offerings.
Sam smiled and said, "There. Tell me that doesn't look good," Sam said.
Cassandra shrugged.
Sam quirked her lips and picked up her spoon. "All right. Be stubborn. But you'll miss out on the most fun food ever."
Cassandra looked up at that.
"Got your attention?" Sam said. She tapped the top square with her spoon and sent it jiggling. She scooped up a few squares and held the spoon over the center of the table. She held the base of the spoon between her thumb and forefinger and pulled down on the cup with her other hand. When she released it, the spoon wobbled and the Jell-O in the cup went crazy.
Cassandra's eyes widened.
Sam took the spoon back and took a big bite. She held the Jell-O in her mouth and squished it between her cheek and teeth. Cassandra actually laughed and covered her mouth at the sound. Sam handed Cassandra a spoon and the girl hesitantly took a bite of her own Jell-O. "Well?" Sam said.
Cassandra made a squishy noise with her mouth and Jell-O dribbled out of her lips.
Sam laughed and handed her a napkin. "Good, kiddo. Good. We'll work on it."
Cassandra smiled and took another bite of her Jell-O.
1. Hypnotized
Sam and Janet were seated across from each other at the dark kitchen table. The only light came from the orange bulb over the oven. Janet was already in her shorts and t-shirt but Sam was still in her jeans and blouse. She had nearly finished her Jell-O when she glanced over and got hypnotized by what Janet was doing.
Her spoon dipped through the whipped topping and came up with a sliver of orange. Janet never took the blue; the blue was Sam's and Janet respected that. Orange was just as good, she promised Sam. She turned her hand and closed her mouth around the cup of the spoon. She dragged it back out, the sterling silver cup now smeared with orange and white streaks.
Janet turned the spoon upright so it looked like a thin man with an oval head. She tilted her head to the side and stuck her tongue out, tracing over the curve of the cup and smacking her lips. She repeated the process on the back of the spoon and touched the corner of her mouth with the tip of her tongue. She hesitated when she saw the scrutiny she was under. "What?"
"You got a little something..." Sam said, snapped from her hypnosis. She stood and came around the edge of the table. Janet leaned back as Sam straddled her and bent down. She licked the corner of Janet's mouth and then captured her bottom lip with her teeth.
When the kiss broke, Janet said, "Did you get it?"
"Get what?" Sam asked, her face still hovering in front of Janet's.
"Whatever you saw on my lip."
Sam laughed. "Oh, honey, there was nothing on your lip."
"Oh," Janet said. She pecked Sam's lips and slid her hands under the hem of Sam's shirt. "Well. Then I think I saw something on your thigh earlier..."
"Oh?"
"Oh," Janet whispered.
2. Sick Day
Sam shuddered, coughed and rolled onto her side. Feeling sick was one thing. Feeling sick, she could handle. But sick and missing school? It was a Monday. She hadn't been to school for three whole days. She sniffled, covered her face with a Kleenex and blew. She dropped the Kleenex into the pile and hugged her pillow as she thought about the lessons she was missing. Right now, she'd have been in Ms. Dubacek's Science class. How she hated to miss that!
Her bedroom door opened and Sam rolled onto her back. "I'm feeling better," she said. "I can go half-a-day."
"No," Beverly Carter chided. She sat on the edge of Sam's bed and pressed the back of her hand against Sam's forehead. Her fingers were long, thin and like pieces of ice against Sam's flesh. "I hate to tell you, kiddo, but you may have to camp out tomorrow, too."
"Noooo," Sam said in a whiny, penitent voice that only children and small dogs can pull off. "I'm feeling be-etter-r."
"Sam..."
Sam groaned and closed her eyes.
Beverly bent down and picked up the tray she'd carried in with her. "Here. This should cheer you up. Blue Jell-O."
Sam took the cup and grimaced at it. It was the only thing she could keep down, but she'd gotten her fill of it since Saturday when she first started feeling ill. Still, she took the spoon and took a bite. As she was distracted, her mother pulled a leather book bag towards the bed. "Oh, and when I went to the store to get some more Jell-O, I ran into one of your teachers."
She withdrew the thick Science book and a stapled sheaf of papers. "Your homework, madam."
Sam nearly dropped her Jell-O in her haste to grab the books. "Oh, thank you, Mom, thank you!"
Beverly laughed as Sam pressed a blue-smeared kiss on her cheek. "You just promise not to overdo it. I'll come up and check on you around lunchtime. Chicken noodle or just broth?"
"Chicken noodle," Sam replied, already flipping through her science book to find the chapter they were on. Her mother left and Sam started reading. For the first time all weekend, she actually felt good. She took another bite of blue Jell-O - the snack that would follow her through the rest of her life as a pick-me-up reminder of this day - and read about neutrons.
3. Battle On
"I have read of a place where humans do battle in a ring of Jell-O." - Teal'c
Jack O'Neill dropped into his seat and handed Teal'c the popcorn. "I'm telling ya, T, this place has got it all. Beer, women, darts, women..."
"Are you listing each individual woman, O'Neill?" Teal'c asked.
A woman in a Metallic t-shirt and ripped blue jeans walked past, smiling at them both as she sashayed up the aisle.
"Yes, I am," Jack said, turning to follow her progress. "Come on, Teal'c. What better way to unwind after a long, harrowing mission than with some utterly mindless entertainment?"
Teal'c remained silent, but seemed dubious.
"Ladies and gentlemen," the announcer said over the loudspeaker, "if there are any ladies or gentlemen in attendance that is...! It's time for our main event! Tonight's battling babes... the raaaaaaaavishing Amazon!!" The curtain pulled back to reveal a slim woman in a brown bikini. Her black hair was wild, her face covered by a lion's head mask. She played up to the crowd, who were jeering her.
"And her opponent! The Laaaaady Einstein!" The curtains parted again and a smaller woman stepped out. She was wearing glasses big enough to obscure most of her face, the mustache covering the rest. Her hair was covered by a thick Einstein wig and the crowd erupted in applause as she stepped out.
She was wearing a lab jacket over her blue bikini and a pair of army boots completed the ensemble. Teal'c raised an eyebrow at the sight, but said nothing.
The swimming pool - easily triple the size one would find in a kid's backyard - was pulled out to center stage by two bikini-clad beauties. It was filled to the brim with blue Jell-O. "God bless America," Jack muttered.
The Amazon and Lady Einstein moved to the edges of the pool and made threatening gestures to one another. The Amazon stepped into the ring first and Lady Einstein joined her a few seconds later. They found their footing in the Jell-O and Lady Einstein whipped off her jacket.
They began to grapple, holding each other's arms just above the elbow. The Amazon tripped Lady Einstein into the pool of blue cubes and pounced on her. The crowd erupted. When Lady Einstein stood, she adjusted her wig and a few sprigs of blonde hair peeked out from beneath it.
Jack scoffed and nearly choked on his popcorn. "That kind of looks like..." He looked over at Teal'c, who was sitting erect in his chair. Jack's smile faded. "What...? You think so, too?"
Lady Einstein put her arm under the Amazon's and lifted it around to cup the back of her head. The Amazon struggled, but her arm was pinned. "I believe I have seen Major Carter perform the same maneuver," Teal'c said.
Jack put down his popcorn and grabbed his cell phone. He dialed Carter's house and waited patiently for her to answer. "Not home... or not answering." He stood, kicking over his popcorn as he stepped into the aisle. "Come on. Let's go see if she answers the door."
"If she does not?" Teal'c asked as he followed Jack up the aisle.
"Then we come back here and talk to Lady Einstein."
---
Jack's tires squealed as he came to a stop outside of Carter's house. He and Teal'c nearly leapt the little wrought-iron gate closing off the hedge and ran up the front walk. "She'll be here," Jack said. "She'll be here."
Teal'c knocked on the door and they stepped back. Ten seconds... then twenty. He was about to knock again when the door swung open and Sam looked at them. "Hold on," she said into her phone. She rested it against her shoulder and said, "Guys, we just got back. I don't want to watch the Empire Strikes Back again..."
"No, uh," Jack said, glancing at Teal'c. "We... just wanted to see if you were home. You have call waiting?"
"Yeah," Sam said. She looked at Teal'c. "Why did you want to see if I was home?"
Jack hesitated and Teal'c said, "Daniel Jackson believed he saw you involved in a car accident downtown. We were closer and assured him we were close enough to ensure you were safe at home."
Jack looked at the phone on Sam's shoulder. 'Please don't be talking to Daniel. Please don't be talking to...'
"Oh," Sam said. "That's sweet. I'm... fine, guys. Really."
"Sure?" Jack said.
"Sure," Sam smiled. "No car accidents in recent memory."
Jack nodded. "All right. I was sure it was nothing, but... you know Teal'c. Always the mother hen."
"Right," Sam nodded. "Well. I should..." she gestured with the phone.
"Right," Jack said. "See you tomorrow, Carter."
---
She watched them walk through the gate before she put the phone to her ear again. "Sorry about that. A couple of guys I work with." She sighed and checked her watch. "So... yeah. Tell Tanya thank you for covering for me. I should be there for the 7:45 show. Oh, and tell the Amazon I'm gonna kick her ass all over that ring."
4. Sweet Dreams
Janet giggled and covered her mouth.
"No giggling," Sam admonished. "You're making it shake."
"Sorry," Janet said. "Sorry. But it's cold!"
"I know," Sam said. She sat up and examined the tower on Janet's midsection. The blue Jell-O squares were perfectly aligned to keep them from sliding down her hips and onto the mattress. A towel had been put under Janet's hips to protect the sheets. Sam picked up the whipped cream can and shook it. "You ready?"
"Yep," Janet nodded.
Sam added the whipped topping to the Jell-O, then added two dabs to Janet's nipples. She licked her lips. "Hurry," Janet giggled, covering her mouth and squeezing her eyes shut. "Hurry! It's so damn cold!"
Sam closed her lips around one white-peaked nipple and sucked up the topping. Janet moaned at the sensation and gasped when Sam blew across the cold, erect nipple. "Ooh," Janet sighed. Sam repeated the move on the other breast and licked her lips. "Now... the main course..."
---
Janet smacked Sam on the side of the head. Sam yelped and opened her eyes. She'd fallen asleep on the couch, her head in Janet's lap. She blinked blearily and realized she'd unbuttoned the bottom of Janet's blouse and had been sucking on her belly. She looked up into Janet's beet-red face and looked around the room.
Cassandra and Dominic were curled on the love seat, while Daniel was sprawled on the floor in front of the TV. Jack and Teal'c were in the armchairs; Jack was asleep and Teal'c was focused intently on the screen.
Sam sat up and folded Janet's shirt back into place. She bit her bottom lip and stood, moving as quietly as possible into the kitchen. When she returned, she was carrying a can of whipped cream and a bowl of Jell-O. No one but Janet paid any attention to her as she crossed through the living room and disappeared upstairs.
When Sam returned, Janet frowned and mouthed, 'What?'
Sam patted Janet's thigh and leaned in to whisper, "Sweet dreams."
Janet looked confused, but smiled and slipped her hand over Sam's thigh.
5. Every Kid's Favorite
Cassandra had barely touched her hot dog. She turned down chicken nuggets, pizza and ice cream. She just stared at the wall and refused to budge. Sam finally came in with two glasses full of Jell-O and placed one in front of the young girl. Cassie stared at it with the same enthusiasm as she had the other offerings.
Sam smiled and said, "There. Tell me that doesn't look good," Sam said.
Cassandra shrugged.
Sam quirked her lips and picked up her spoon. "All right. Be stubborn. But you'll miss out on the most fun food ever."
Cassandra looked up at that.
"Got your attention?" Sam said. She tapped the top square with her spoon and sent it jiggling. She scooped up a few squares and held the spoon over the center of the table. She held the base of the spoon between her thumb and forefinger and pulled down on the cup with her other hand. When she released it, the spoon wobbled and the Jell-O in the cup went crazy.
Cassandra's eyes widened.
Sam took the spoon back and took a big bite. She held the Jell-O in her mouth and squished it between her cheek and teeth. Cassandra actually laughed and covered her mouth at the sound. Sam handed Cassandra a spoon and the girl hesitantly took a bite of her own Jell-O. "Well?" Sam said.
Cassandra made a squishy noise with her mouth and Jell-O dribbled out of her lips.
Sam laughed and handed her a napkin. "Good, kiddo. Good. We'll work on it."
Cassandra smiled and took another bite of her Jell-O.