Argh
Alright....
Work is my life now, which is the exact same situation I wanted to avoid following my fathers' footsteps in. Every waking moment I am thinking about work. When I am away from work I am virtually "on call". I worry about how the part timer is doing or how the new guy is doing. Last night I went down there to bail our part timer out of a sticky situation - a guy who is 60 years old and hates my fucking guts none-the-less - without putting in for any overtime.
I'm constantly stressed out and feel that I am in over my head. I have so much shit to do before the Summer ends that it's hardly a respite from the busy semesters during the normal year. My union sucks and has no power, my boss is a power-tripping c-word who is likely robbing the college blind, and my co-workers are already looking for other jobs.
I have no time for myself. When I am home there's always something that needs to be done. Every fucking weekend (5 weeks counting!) my wife has picked fights with me, so there's no peaceful downtime when I'm away from that place... and for even saying so, I'm clearly a bastard.
In short, my life sucks right now, and it doesn't look like it'll improve anytime soon. I need relief. This Summer, as a new employee, I just don't have the vacation time to take off like I truly need to. About the only respite I have is either in a bottle or a bag of weed. I've managed not to become a raging drunk, but still drink a bit more than I really feel comfortable with. Even mentioning weed sets the wife off, although it would be infinitely more healthy for my body and soul than drinking and/or being a bundle of stress constantly.
As money allows, I think I'll remove the three-month restrictions on weed that I've had in place for the last few years. It'll cause hell with the wife, but fuck it. It's safe, it's better than booze, and I need stress relief that does not leave me hungover the next day.
Maybe I shouldn't look for relief in a substance and all that shit, but you tell me a better way. I've looked all over for it. I'm truly at the end of my rope, and if I don't do something drastic I may end up an alcoholic or a quivering basketcase. Lecture me as you will, but I fail to see how toking every night or two would be any worse than living in constant stress. At least I'll feel a bit better if nothing else.
Work is my life now, which is the exact same situation I wanted to avoid following my fathers' footsteps in. Every waking moment I am thinking about work. When I am away from work I am virtually "on call". I worry about how the part timer is doing or how the new guy is doing. Last night I went down there to bail our part timer out of a sticky situation - a guy who is 60 years old and hates my fucking guts none-the-less - without putting in for any overtime.
I'm constantly stressed out and feel that I am in over my head. I have so much shit to do before the Summer ends that it's hardly a respite from the busy semesters during the normal year. My union sucks and has no power, my boss is a power-tripping c-word who is likely robbing the college blind, and my co-workers are already looking for other jobs.
I have no time for myself. When I am home there's always something that needs to be done. Every fucking weekend (5 weeks counting!) my wife has picked fights with me, so there's no peaceful downtime when I'm away from that place... and for even saying so, I'm clearly a bastard.
In short, my life sucks right now, and it doesn't look like it'll improve anytime soon. I need relief. This Summer, as a new employee, I just don't have the vacation time to take off like I truly need to. About the only respite I have is either in a bottle or a bag of weed. I've managed not to become a raging drunk, but still drink a bit more than I really feel comfortable with. Even mentioning weed sets the wife off, although it would be infinitely more healthy for my body and soul than drinking and/or being a bundle of stress constantly.
As money allows, I think I'll remove the three-month restrictions on weed that I've had in place for the last few years. It'll cause hell with the wife, but fuck it. It's safe, it's better than booze, and I need stress relief that does not leave me hungover the next day.
Maybe I shouldn't look for relief in a substance and all that shit, but you tell me a better way. I've looked all over for it. I'm truly at the end of my rope, and if I don't do something drastic I may end up an alcoholic or a quivering basketcase. Lecture me as you will, but I fail to see how toking every night or two would be any worse than living in constant stress. At least I'll feel a bit better if nothing else.