Thwarted
Yesterday was a perfectly lovely day with the sun shining, the birds singing, and my head pounding so badly all the plans I had to Get Things Done went for naught. So I decided to post meaningless tidbits about my life instead, waiting for the pills to kick in. Consider this a two day update, since I never did feel quite right yesterday.
The upstairs neighbors from hell have moved, or at least are staying elsewhere now. They were getting some boxes and small things out yesterday morning when I woke up (which is what woke me up, the inevitable thudding, banging, and dropping) but I haven't heard or seen anything since. At least they didn't leave the water running, which I expected coming from two people that selfish and clueless. Friday the male half of the duo was screaming at his friends who were helping him move out the TV and the sofa that they weren't doing anything right, prompting a shouting match in the middle of the street with the van owner telling upstairs dude that he "is an asshole." Dude, I could have told you that! Now perhaps I can get my bathroom sink fixed? It's only been two months without it!
This afternoon I am working on sanding and plastering the patches where the old plaster washed away in the bathroom.
Bought a book of poetry on a whim the other day, an anthology of modern poems, and to my surprise, am enjoying it very much. It seems as if there has been a bit of a swing back toward structure in poems; not necessarily rhyme, but very strong emphasis on meter. It's soothing to read a few before bed.
I'm also starting to try to meditate. I don't know how successful I will be at that; I've never had much luck stilling my mind and focusing unless it's in the pursuit of work (and the less said about work, the better). I keep berating myself for all the things I'm not doing because it always seems as if no matter what I accomplish I could and should do more. That's not healthy for anyone to do. There's a place in the world for good enough.
And, and this is a big and, I am trying to reach out more to others. It's so easy to isolate myself, and I tend to fall into a state where I feel I have nothing worthwhile to contribute or to say because my life is really so very boring looking at it. Maybe posting like this is a way of seeking approval.
This entry was originally posted at http://gentlehum-mel.dreamwidth.org/1534.html. Please comment there using OpenID.
The upstairs neighbors from hell have moved, or at least are staying elsewhere now. They were getting some boxes and small things out yesterday morning when I woke up (which is what woke me up, the inevitable thudding, banging, and dropping) but I haven't heard or seen anything since. At least they didn't leave the water running, which I expected coming from two people that selfish and clueless. Friday the male half of the duo was screaming at his friends who were helping him move out the TV and the sofa that they weren't doing anything right, prompting a shouting match in the middle of the street with the van owner telling upstairs dude that he "is an asshole." Dude, I could have told you that! Now perhaps I can get my bathroom sink fixed? It's only been two months without it!
This afternoon I am working on sanding and plastering the patches where the old plaster washed away in the bathroom.
Bought a book of poetry on a whim the other day, an anthology of modern poems, and to my surprise, am enjoying it very much. It seems as if there has been a bit of a swing back toward structure in poems; not necessarily rhyme, but very strong emphasis on meter. It's soothing to read a few before bed.
I'm also starting to try to meditate. I don't know how successful I will be at that; I've never had much luck stilling my mind and focusing unless it's in the pursuit of work (and the less said about work, the better). I keep berating myself for all the things I'm not doing because it always seems as if no matter what I accomplish I could and should do more. That's not healthy for anyone to do. There's a place in the world for good enough.
And, and this is a big and, I am trying to reach out more to others. It's so easy to isolate myself, and I tend to fall into a state where I feel I have nothing worthwhile to contribute or to say because my life is really so very boring looking at it. Maybe posting like this is a way of seeking approval.
This entry was originally posted at http://gentlehum-mel.dreamwidth.org/1534.html. Please comment there using OpenID.