Life is tasty

Aug 09, 2005 19:10

At least I can taste life, I can't taste anything tangible with this nice cold that got passed on to me so generously. Things are fairly level now, I wish I had more time for myself, or at least more friends to spend time with, I think work has consumed too much of me. I went to church Sunday night with my parents to see if DBC has changed any, no, it hasn't. I see that church and pretty much think that I'll be in the same boat at any church, but I would like to find one, I feel fairly distant, especially when I have the mentality that all churches are evil because the ones we know now days are an institution of man, and are nothing what God had in mind for us to do. Bleh. Don't ever get into a religious discussion with me, I'll bore you to death. I'm really enjoying my job, everything that it brings me, the stress, the opportunities, the people, the challenges, and the victories; it's refreshing to know that I'm good at something, maybe that's why I get so stressed about it, because if I start to think that I'm doing bad in this one thing, then I have nothing else that I'm doing good at. I should have a kitchen in about two weeks, that will be a load off my shoulders. My house will actually be a house and not some construction zone. I think I miss companionship, I want to find someone, but I don't have the time, and when I do look, I tend to get disappointed at what I see, there seems to be no one out there that has the traits that I like, and if I do find someone that has those things that I like, they don't have the same feelings towards me. I think everyone has these problems, I just don't want to settle like everyone else does, and hurt someone or myself in the process, this is why I rarely date, and when I do, it means that that person fits what I'm looking for. The problem with my relationships are that it seems like every girl I date or have a relationship with, the next one is that much better that the last one, which frustrates me because I know that my choices have just been narrowed that much more. If I think that the character, personality, and physical appearance of a girl that I'm thinking about dating doesn't add up to the character, personality, and physical appearance of the last girl I dated, then I won't date them. Don't get me wrong, I don't consider myself shallow or picky; most of the time I have to get to know the girl before I ever start to really like them, and with getting to know them, their personality defines if their attraction level goes up or down. ok, I AM picky, I just realized that, but I'm definitely not shallow. Bottom line is, I wanna meet somebody, or get to know someone who I'm already acquainted with, as much as I learn to loathe relationships, I want one again.
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