Dec 10, 2002 01:55
I just found this...
I probably couldn't describe it better myself... how I feel:
You know all you could do. You know all you should do. But it's like your very essence has fallen back into the abyss and is curling, covering it's face as it turns to dust. I just can't do it anymore. When this happens my whole mental system shuts down. I just go numb. It's like someone drained me and all I'm left with is my shell and somehow I'm suppose to motivate myself and make myself function. I just can't seem to get myself out of this shit hole. And I know, no one wants someone like this, unless they're emotionally masochistic right?
The bad part about this is I come off looking lazy. I come off looking like I'm doing nothing. But you don't know how much effort it takes JUST to make that effort. It seems easy. And if you've not been in the same place you won't understand just how impossible it really begins to be to do something.