"her maidenhead breached by his driving heat" - oh oh that's bad. Nearly as bad as Christine Feehan's darkly brooding males driving their "hard shafts" into their lifemates "velvety sheath" ugh ugh get it off me!
Ha! I love the bad euphemisms. This book was just swimming with them, and I laughed every time I came across a particularly colourful one. The maidenhead one was my favourite, though.
Umm... semi-standard. I think it was more popular in the late 80s and early 90s, and a lot of the cheesier ones still do it. But the more recent and generally acclaimed romances manage to avoid the horrible, horrible euphemisms in their love scenes. Which misses out on the whole comedic effect, but I rather suspect that's the point in leaving them out. ;)
This review seriously has me lmao. The quotes alone must have sent me into spasms for 5 minutes. "Guess he ran out of wax after he did his chest" was the best snark ever. I love books like this where the plot is completely convoluted and then wraps up at the very last second through a series of events that make absolutely no sense. Great review!
Apparently he's "authored" a few books, so keep your eye out at the used book stores! Or if you get really desperate, you could always pick up a cheap copy from Amazon
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This post was great! I'm L-ingMAO! Thanks for that. :) I did actually read a few of the Fabio books when they were first published about a thousand, er I mean, what, 15 years ago? I can vouch from experience that cheesy was in back then, lol. Not so much now. Sadly, I did not save these books for my Keeper Shelf... ok, I'm not sad about it. But your post was priceless!
I actually haven't determined if this one's going to be a Keeper or not... but I do have a list of friends who want to read it now, so I think it might be destined to be passed around for quite awhile.
I'm still giggling my butt off just from your first line, "This book was awful. I enjoyed every minute of it." Talk about hooking your readers! And I'm not at all surprised that your friends want to read it to see if it truly is as hilariously awful as you said. :D It's worth the read for the laugh/entertainment factor alone, and I can vouch that it really is that bad, lol. Thanks again, I needed a good laugh.
bwhahahaha ...I haven't heard the word "maidenhead" since highschool ... which is around the time that Fabio was showing up on all the Hysterical Romance covers. Reading the plot (and seeing the cover) brought me back to when I used to read a lot of romances. The plot actually didn't sound that out of step from some that I'd read.
As painful as the plot appeared to be, you sound like you had a hell of a good time reading it - sometimes bad is good. Thanks for the review - it had me laughing out loud while I sipped my coffee this morning.
Oh, I had a fantastic time with this book. I think it's one of those ones you just have to be in the right mind set to enjoy, but considering the tagline on the front cover was "The Sexiest Man in the World Invites You to Join Him in His Romantic Fantasy" (excessive capitals and all), I had a pretty good idea what to expect/hope for. I wasn't disappointed.
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So Fabio "writes", does he? I had no idea....
"her maidenhead breached by his driving heat" - oh oh that's bad. Nearly as bad as Christine Feehan's darkly brooding males driving their "hard shafts" into their lifemates "velvety sheath" ugh ugh get it off me!
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As painful as the plot appeared to be, you sound like you had a hell of a good time reading it - sometimes bad is good. Thanks for the review - it had me laughing out loud while I sipped my coffee this morning.
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