FIC: Of Desitny (Giles, Ethan, FR13)
Title: Of Destiny
Author: aaronlisa
Fandom: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Pairing/Characters: Rupert Giles, Ethan Rayne, Merrick with a mention of Buffy and Quentin Travers
Rating: FR13
Disclaimer: Buffy the Vampire Slayer belongs to Joss Whedon and company. The lyrics taken from the album Dark Side of the Moon belong to Pink Floyd.
Prompts: Written for the Giles round at genfic_minis for mercuriewords who wanted to see regret, an old friend, and cunning. (Not sure how well I did at that last prompt.)
Notes: Set roughly around the Third Season.
Summary: Their relationship was so complicated, even now when they had chosen their sides on opposing armies.
Word Count: 1748
The whiskey burned as it went down, like it always did, and Giles set the glass down on the wooden end table and closed his eyes as he rested his head against the back of the chair. He allowed himself to get lost into the opening strains of Dark Side of the Moon. It was an album that he didn’t listen to very often now, not because he didn’t still enjoy but instead because it reminded him far too much of Ethan Rayne. No doubt Ethan was on his way to spread chaos somewhere else after having been chased out of Sunnydale once again.
Don’t be afraid to care / Leave but don’t leave me
Their relationship was so complicated, even now when they had chosen their sides on opposing armies. Ethan was determined to continue the work they had begun twenty some odd years ago and Giles was determined to atone for his sins. Yet still, they seemed to always gravitate towards one another, drawn to one another on some instinctual level. Whenever their paths converged, Giles was reminded of who he once was, of the regrets that he had, of the chances that he willingly threw away to be someone that wasn’t necessarily who he wanted to be. Even now Giles was never sure of how he felt for Ethan, all he knew was that he was glad to see Ethan gone from Sunnydale.
Giles sighs and pushes away the thoughts and confusion that focus on Ethan and instead he thinks about when he was on the verge of being a young man.
You fritter and waste the hours in an off hand way
There had been a time when Rupert Giles had been uncertain about his destiny. Did he really want to follow in the footsteps of his father and his grandmother and the countless other Fairweathers before her? He wasn’t overly thrilled about the fact that his entire life had been planned out for him by the time his mother had conceived him. So he had turned away by rebelling in a hundred minor ways such as falling behind in his classes at the Academy, A hundred petty rebellions that disappointed his grandmother and angered his father yet never seemed to deter them from their continued planning of his life.
When he was fifteen, he ran away from the Academy and made his way to London. It opened his eyes to how much more to life there was than the constant dusty books in the Academy library, dead languages, dull, boring and pompous teachers who droned on about how precious the destiny of the Slayers. Why should he care about some bird who’d die at the hands of some monster only to have another bird take her place? He wanted to experience all that life had to offer, not just death, decay and destruction. So Rupert had become Ripper and he had found his way to the seedy bars and clubs where he fell in love with the music scene and several young, pretty, sloe-eyed girls.
And then he had met Ethan and the others and his life had changed. Ripper had learned that magic could be used for so much more than what the Academy had taught him. He had embraced every single thing that Ethan brought to the table. Loosing himself into days and nights of heady, drunken, hedonistic pleasure until it all came crashing down on them and suddenly it didn’t seem to be as much fun anymore or as thrilling or as pleasurable.
Don’t give me that do goody good bullshit
He had returned in disgrace, his father and grandmother beyond disappointed in him now that he had returned. His life was in shambles as he struggled to catch up to where his peers were. And all the time, Giles found comfort in the refuge that he had once turned away from. Yet things were changing within the Council, things weren’t like they had been before. His grandmother was dying and in the end Giles only stayed long enough to see her buried in the ancient family plot. Her death made him realize that the Council held nothing for him. Not at this time.
Once again he left, this time to temper the things that Ethan had taught him. To learn how to control them so that when he returned to the Council, he could better serve. During the decade that he was gone, he ran into Ethan time and time again. Every time, Ethan always tried to convert him to his latest cause and every time, Giles turned him down. The line drawn between the two of them becoming more and more pronounced as Giles realized that he would be eventually returning to the Council not to seek out power but to actually do good in the world.
Yet Ethan always challenged him, made him ask if the Council was really the best place to turn to, the best place to serve, especially after his father’s death. For a while, Giles almost bought into what Ethan was trying to solve. The words that Ethan had used had been cunning and false as always but still they had almost won Giles over yet again.
“Why do you follow their every petty order? There was a time Rupert when you rebelled against it, when you saw them for what they were. They’re not saviours or saints or even invested in the girls that they send off to die over and over again. They’re nothing more than charlatans who dress up what they do as good deeds all while profiting off it,” Ethan had told him one night in a motel room in Cairo.
He still questions why he didn’t listen to Ethan, why he hadn’t just followed the darker man and tried to convert him. Giles didn’t doubt that he could sway Ethan into turning his skills towards a better cause than petty mischief and mayhem. Even now, Ethan’s words that night still ring his ears every time the Council made a demand.
Haven’t you heard it’s a battle of words
Just before Buffy was called, Giles had woken up one night in the middle of nowhere in an attempt to procure an ancient text for the Council and he had wondered why he was wasting his life and his talents on being nothing more than a glorified dogsbody for the Council. He had run into Ethan a year and a half ago and the other man’s words were still working on him. Giles had long realized that he was never going to get anywhere, not with his grandmother and father dead and his failures to be a good little soldier. He’d never even get close to a Potential much less an actual Slayer at this rate.
Yet two days earlier he had run into Merrick. Another misfit of a Watcher who was essentially in a similar position as he was. They had gotten drunk together and Giles had confided his fears and worries, parroting Ethan’s words to Merrick that night. And in a moment of drunken epiphany, Giles had declared that he was going to defect once more, this time for good.
“Why should I waste my talents for the like of Quentin Travers and his cut? What does he watch other than the growth of the pounds in his bank account? He’s the worse kind of general there is, he sends off little girls to die knowing that it doesn’t matter how many of them fall because another one will awaken on the death of another! He’s a charlatan selling snake oil to the Watchers and dressing it up in pretty words. I think it’s time I quit and I think you should too. Good men like us could do a lot more good than chasing down dusty old tomes that no one back home reads.”
Merrick had laughed at Giles’ words before pouring them another shot each of the vintage cognac. Giles had continued to pace and spew words about how corrupt the Council was. Finally when he was speechless, Giles sat down in the chair he had recently abandoned, threw back the cognac and slumped into the chair.
“We could do that, but that sounds like Ethan’s words not your own. Rupert, you know why we stay. It’s the chance that we might just end up as a Watcher over a Slayer. That we might have the chance to actually weed out the corruption bit by bit. Ethan Rayne’s a dangerous man, a man who fancies himself a wizard, but instead of intellect, he uses cunning to get what he wants. He won’t be satisfied until all the world’s aflame and chaos reigns, mark my words Rupert.”
You raise the blade, you make the change
In the end, Giles had been summoned back home, back to the Council and he was put through a series of test to prove his worth. Finally, and almost reluctantly, Travers had deemed him worthy to go to Sunnydale and take control of their wayward Slayer. Giles had known going in that Travers had seriously hoped that by sending Giles to the Hellmouth, that he would be soon receiving the death certificates of one Buffy Summers and Rupert Giles so that the next Slayer and Watcher would be more suitable, more profitable and so on. But knowing this meant that Giles was determined to ensure that his charge survived everything that the Hellmouth threw at them.
Yet at the same time, he still longed for those heady days back when he still thought that magic was the answer to everything. He missed the days that he spent in a small little flat in London with Ethan and the others, where they were larger than life and could have everything that they wanted. Whenever Ethan decided to blow into town, Giles would find himself full of regret and longing yet at the same time as he saw how Ethan had changed, how he had become corrupt and dangerous, Giles was grateful that he had thrown that life away when he had had the chance to do so.
He had fallen into the destiny that his grandmother and his father had planned for him in the end. It was still a largely unwanted destiny but it was head much as Buffy’s destiny was hers. No matter how much they had both tried to shirk their destinies, they were both unable to escape them.
**END**
Author: aaronlisa
Fandom: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Pairing/Characters: Rupert Giles, Ethan Rayne, Merrick with a mention of Buffy and Quentin Travers
Rating: FR13
Disclaimer: Buffy the Vampire Slayer belongs to Joss Whedon and company. The lyrics taken from the album Dark Side of the Moon belong to Pink Floyd.
Prompts: Written for the Giles round at genfic_minis for mercuriewords who wanted to see regret, an old friend, and cunning. (Not sure how well I did at that last prompt.)
Notes: Set roughly around the Third Season.
Summary: Their relationship was so complicated, even now when they had chosen their sides on opposing armies.
Word Count: 1748
The whiskey burned as it went down, like it always did, and Giles set the glass down on the wooden end table and closed his eyes as he rested his head against the back of the chair. He allowed himself to get lost into the opening strains of Dark Side of the Moon. It was an album that he didn’t listen to very often now, not because he didn’t still enjoy but instead because it reminded him far too much of Ethan Rayne. No doubt Ethan was on his way to spread chaos somewhere else after having been chased out of Sunnydale once again.
Don’t be afraid to care / Leave but don’t leave me
Their relationship was so complicated, even now when they had chosen their sides on opposing armies. Ethan was determined to continue the work they had begun twenty some odd years ago and Giles was determined to atone for his sins. Yet still, they seemed to always gravitate towards one another, drawn to one another on some instinctual level. Whenever their paths converged, Giles was reminded of who he once was, of the regrets that he had, of the chances that he willingly threw away to be someone that wasn’t necessarily who he wanted to be. Even now Giles was never sure of how he felt for Ethan, all he knew was that he was glad to see Ethan gone from Sunnydale.
Giles sighs and pushes away the thoughts and confusion that focus on Ethan and instead he thinks about when he was on the verge of being a young man.
You fritter and waste the hours in an off hand way
There had been a time when Rupert Giles had been uncertain about his destiny. Did he really want to follow in the footsteps of his father and his grandmother and the countless other Fairweathers before her? He wasn’t overly thrilled about the fact that his entire life had been planned out for him by the time his mother had conceived him. So he had turned away by rebelling in a hundred minor ways such as falling behind in his classes at the Academy, A hundred petty rebellions that disappointed his grandmother and angered his father yet never seemed to deter them from their continued planning of his life.
When he was fifteen, he ran away from the Academy and made his way to London. It opened his eyes to how much more to life there was than the constant dusty books in the Academy library, dead languages, dull, boring and pompous teachers who droned on about how precious the destiny of the Slayers. Why should he care about some bird who’d die at the hands of some monster only to have another bird take her place? He wanted to experience all that life had to offer, not just death, decay and destruction. So Rupert had become Ripper and he had found his way to the seedy bars and clubs where he fell in love with the music scene and several young, pretty, sloe-eyed girls.
And then he had met Ethan and the others and his life had changed. Ripper had learned that magic could be used for so much more than what the Academy had taught him. He had embraced every single thing that Ethan brought to the table. Loosing himself into days and nights of heady, drunken, hedonistic pleasure until it all came crashing down on them and suddenly it didn’t seem to be as much fun anymore or as thrilling or as pleasurable.
Don’t give me that do goody good bullshit
He had returned in disgrace, his father and grandmother beyond disappointed in him now that he had returned. His life was in shambles as he struggled to catch up to where his peers were. And all the time, Giles found comfort in the refuge that he had once turned away from. Yet things were changing within the Council, things weren’t like they had been before. His grandmother was dying and in the end Giles only stayed long enough to see her buried in the ancient family plot. Her death made him realize that the Council held nothing for him. Not at this time.
Once again he left, this time to temper the things that Ethan had taught him. To learn how to control them so that when he returned to the Council, he could better serve. During the decade that he was gone, he ran into Ethan time and time again. Every time, Ethan always tried to convert him to his latest cause and every time, Giles turned him down. The line drawn between the two of them becoming more and more pronounced as Giles realized that he would be eventually returning to the Council not to seek out power but to actually do good in the world.
Yet Ethan always challenged him, made him ask if the Council was really the best place to turn to, the best place to serve, especially after his father’s death. For a while, Giles almost bought into what Ethan was trying to solve. The words that Ethan had used had been cunning and false as always but still they had almost won Giles over yet again.
“Why do you follow their every petty order? There was a time Rupert when you rebelled against it, when you saw them for what they were. They’re not saviours or saints or even invested in the girls that they send off to die over and over again. They’re nothing more than charlatans who dress up what they do as good deeds all while profiting off it,” Ethan had told him one night in a motel room in Cairo.
He still questions why he didn’t listen to Ethan, why he hadn’t just followed the darker man and tried to convert him. Giles didn’t doubt that he could sway Ethan into turning his skills towards a better cause than petty mischief and mayhem. Even now, Ethan’s words that night still ring his ears every time the Council made a demand.
Haven’t you heard it’s a battle of words
Just before Buffy was called, Giles had woken up one night in the middle of nowhere in an attempt to procure an ancient text for the Council and he had wondered why he was wasting his life and his talents on being nothing more than a glorified dogsbody for the Council. He had run into Ethan a year and a half ago and the other man’s words were still working on him. Giles had long realized that he was never going to get anywhere, not with his grandmother and father dead and his failures to be a good little soldier. He’d never even get close to a Potential much less an actual Slayer at this rate.
Yet two days earlier he had run into Merrick. Another misfit of a Watcher who was essentially in a similar position as he was. They had gotten drunk together and Giles had confided his fears and worries, parroting Ethan’s words to Merrick that night. And in a moment of drunken epiphany, Giles had declared that he was going to defect once more, this time for good.
“Why should I waste my talents for the like of Quentin Travers and his cut? What does he watch other than the growth of the pounds in his bank account? He’s the worse kind of general there is, he sends off little girls to die knowing that it doesn’t matter how many of them fall because another one will awaken on the death of another! He’s a charlatan selling snake oil to the Watchers and dressing it up in pretty words. I think it’s time I quit and I think you should too. Good men like us could do a lot more good than chasing down dusty old tomes that no one back home reads.”
Merrick had laughed at Giles’ words before pouring them another shot each of the vintage cognac. Giles had continued to pace and spew words about how corrupt the Council was. Finally when he was speechless, Giles sat down in the chair he had recently abandoned, threw back the cognac and slumped into the chair.
“We could do that, but that sounds like Ethan’s words not your own. Rupert, you know why we stay. It’s the chance that we might just end up as a Watcher over a Slayer. That we might have the chance to actually weed out the corruption bit by bit. Ethan Rayne’s a dangerous man, a man who fancies himself a wizard, but instead of intellect, he uses cunning to get what he wants. He won’t be satisfied until all the world’s aflame and chaos reigns, mark my words Rupert.”
You raise the blade, you make the change
In the end, Giles had been summoned back home, back to the Council and he was put through a series of test to prove his worth. Finally, and almost reluctantly, Travers had deemed him worthy to go to Sunnydale and take control of their wayward Slayer. Giles had known going in that Travers had seriously hoped that by sending Giles to the Hellmouth, that he would be soon receiving the death certificates of one Buffy Summers and Rupert Giles so that the next Slayer and Watcher would be more suitable, more profitable and so on. But knowing this meant that Giles was determined to ensure that his charge survived everything that the Hellmouth threw at them.
Yet at the same time, he still longed for those heady days back when he still thought that magic was the answer to everything. He missed the days that he spent in a small little flat in London with Ethan and the others, where they were larger than life and could have everything that they wanted. Whenever Ethan decided to blow into town, Giles would find himself full of regret and longing yet at the same time as he saw how Ethan had changed, how he had become corrupt and dangerous, Giles was grateful that he had thrown that life away when he had had the chance to do so.
He had fallen into the destiny that his grandmother and his father had planned for him in the end. It was still a largely unwanted destiny but it was head much as Buffy’s destiny was hers. No matter how much they had both tried to shirk their destinies, they were both unable to escape them.
**END**