i so tired...the sleepies ish gooood

[gen0cid3]

mkay, so i pillaged me mums house on monday, then i got a call from bryan, so we went up to the mall, so he could get an application from FYE...he never got it. went back to his house, spent some time with josh n jason. tuesday did abso-fucking-lutely nothing, except go to bryan's house for band practice, quite entertaining, ended up writing a bit, i'll share it at the end of this entry. anyway, bryan's bandmates are some pretty nifty people, lots of fun to watch, and i'm impressed with the communication and dedication...they're definately going somewhere. wednesday, did nothing...again...then da came home and went out to his parents house, i had a hotdog for dinner, oh yum. naturally the conversation got philisophical and occasionally violent, but the chats are always enjoyed by all. my dad is taking me mom to court, to settle the custody and child suport dispute, she's been writing checks to him for like $100 every week for my childsupport or something, technically they're not, but dad's lawyer said to cash them...so woOt for a little bit more money. i still haven't found a friggin car yet, it's starting to make me angry. and today, jasen woke me up at 5:30 in the fucking morning by texting me, and unfortunately, i couldn't get back to sleep, so i ended up cleaning my room at seven thirty in the morning, then i went through all my mystery cds and listened to them and wrote down what songs were on them and then labeled the cds, then i went to meijers to get some school supplies, didn't get it all, but close enough. i wish i could get my hands on one of those checks from my mom, i'd go bonkers if i got a set of 72 Prismacolors. so i came back home, continued to do nothing for a while as it was only 11:30 in the morning when i was finished with everything. i came over to visit me grandma, i don't get over here as often as i should. the chemo is practically hammering in the coffin nails...i'm terrified of losing her, because quite honestly, she's the only one who ever really backed me about anything. even if i'm the oddball grandchild from hell, she really accepts me for it, and she does it better than my parents do. she loves me just showing up in some wild new outfit with my stompy new rocks. i'm thinking of doing an undercut on my hair again, but have it go up higher this time, i'm sick of it, i can't do anything with it. i wanna add some color but my dad is the hair nazi and would freak, but, i think i've kinda got a place at bryan's if it really comes down to that. i'd like to get the undercut and have bryan put in some dread extentions (i'm never dreading my real hair again) then i could change my hair and colors as much as i wanted, and bryan would have extra spending money. tomorrow looks thoroughly unpleasant as i must pay my bills to my mom and make 2490502984752890437 calls to doctors and other such aqquaintences to reschedule appointments that i have severly forgotten. i also get paid, but itll be a small check...i can't work all that much since patrice hasn't picked out the designs for the new costumes, so no sewing for me for now, though i'd love to get into making my own clothes if tracy would bless me with her sewing machine. but labor day weekend will be a bitch, i'm a floater for arts beats and eats. uber money but shitty schedule. so i guess thats it, if anyone wants to do anything this weekend, i have to work both days but i'm totally free at night. so pretty pretty please call mkay?

oh, and the stuff i wrote, it's more like random thoughts spewed out

biohazard eyes
acidic lips with poison kisses
virus filling
virus killing
enter shut down sequence
mindrape virus found
mind fuck loading
self destruct
self destructing
self destructing now

i can't remember which song i wrote that to, i think it's headsplit trauma or enter state of mind, i'm pretty sure it's enter state of mind.