i feel your pain, i wrote this song for you~

[gemkazoni]

Post anything you like here, but post it anonymously. It can be something big or small, whatever you feel compelled to. Maybe a (1) story, (2) secret, (3) confession, (4) fear, (5) love-the possibilities are endless. Be sure to comment anonymously, though.I am feeling a little sick and a little sad right now for no reason in particular. -___-;; I'

Comments

[anonymous]

I had a troubling conversation with a long time friend last night. I've always felt a little arguing was necessary in friendships and relationships in general, perhaps since I used to be a complete doormat, especially in regards to this friend. Now they claim that I disagree with them on absolutely everything and do nothing but argue every last thing, because they think I want to show my independence from them.

I honestly don't know what to make of it. I would like to think I'm not entirely reliant on them as I used to be, or some kind of submissive doormat who agreed with everything, but I can never seem to get things on a neutral ground. Now it seems I'm on the opposite end of the spectrum I started from. I'm afraid that agreeing with them a lot is going to put me in the same position it did before. I guess that's kind of stupid, but I thought I'd get it out, anyway.

Unrelated, don't fret about the comments. Especially on LJ, feedback for fics is incredibly sparse. Have you considered posting it on ff.net, too? There needs to be more good!fic there.

[gemkazoni]

Oh boy, can I relate to this. I don't think it's stupid! I've been the exact same way with best friends I've had. Because in rl, I'm always the meek one who does what other people say, I've seemed to attract bold friends all my life who just want someone who'll back them up and always do what they say without much resistance. :( Who, of course, then get angry anytime I try to argue with them.

I'm really sorry about you argument. I suppose all I can say to help would be to explain to that friend what you said here, that you don't want to be their "doormat" and you're not trying to "show your independence", that you just want to express your opinions freely and that's all. If they're a true friend, I would hope they'd understand.

I hope it helped to get it out. :D

And yeah, I started posting it on ff.net today as well! Thanks for the suggestion anyway, anon. <33