Some thoughts, some non-thoughts...
I get into work and am immediately called into the office.
J: "You worked late last night, huh?"
Z: "Yeah, just an hour."
J: "Thanks for doing that. Were you upset about it?"
Z: "I was really grumpy and pissed,.. but not really about staying late. It just sucked in general."
J: "How?"
Z: "I just dont like social games. If you need my help, please say, 'It would be great if you could stay late.'... rather than, 'its your paycheck,...'..."
J: "Ok,.. Ill remember. Just remember that I understand if you can't stay late. I mean, I only EXPECT you to be here during your scheduled hours... but sometimes an extra body or extra help is a HUGE help, like when its busy."
Z: "I know,.. and I try to.. you just need to ask me straight out rather than playing it off sarcastically."
Then later... Patty asked me about the other manager and how I liked what he was doing.. how he got along with everyone.. etc.
People at work are beginning to treat me like... well... like Im going to stay around. Caring about what I think.. etc. Its pleasant.
I volunteered to continue working 6 day weeks, spending 1 day a week "pulling" and doing "audits". I would really like that. Extra money and a job I can wake up late for and do without talking to people.
More and more often I hear, "Yeah, thats exactly right" when I get second opinions on loan values. That feels good. I get to feel like an expert all day. Stereos, diamonds, gold, tools, speakers, amps, guitars... an expert at everything. Until I got some camera questions today. Then I got to feel like an idiot some more. But I did have a customer teach me the basics about gas and battery powered RC vehicles.. so that was fun.
Some lonely girl who comes in every now and again wants to be my friend. She wanted my phone number and gave me hers... she wants to invite me and Jesse out to dinner with her and her husband. She's so strangely lonely. Desperately lonely. She told me a story about being stabbed 12 times by an ex boyfriend once.
Thats what I call an "awkward" topic.
I hear these terrible stories from people... beatings, prison, drug use, theft, sick children, electric bills, homelessness, joblessness, terrible L&I suits,... everything under the sun.
And you can sometimes see these people's lives crumbling around them.
Nighttime drama characters have it "tough" when they have to face one hard decision,.. or have to go through one hard problem... real life doesn't take turns like a circle of Ninjas in a bad Kung-Fu movie... usually it tackles you like a college football team tackles a drunk 15 yr old girl. All at once and brutally.
When only one thing is going wrong in my life.... that means things are going good. Hehe
Im hungry. Jesse is packing.. I should probably follow suit.
J: "You worked late last night, huh?"
Z: "Yeah, just an hour."
J: "Thanks for doing that. Were you upset about it?"
Z: "I was really grumpy and pissed,.. but not really about staying late. It just sucked in general."
J: "How?"
Z: "I just dont like social games. If you need my help, please say, 'It would be great if you could stay late.'... rather than, 'its your paycheck,...'..."
J: "Ok,.. Ill remember. Just remember that I understand if you can't stay late. I mean, I only EXPECT you to be here during your scheduled hours... but sometimes an extra body or extra help is a HUGE help, like when its busy."
Z: "I know,.. and I try to.. you just need to ask me straight out rather than playing it off sarcastically."
Then later... Patty asked me about the other manager and how I liked what he was doing.. how he got along with everyone.. etc.
People at work are beginning to treat me like... well... like Im going to stay around. Caring about what I think.. etc. Its pleasant.
I volunteered to continue working 6 day weeks, spending 1 day a week "pulling" and doing "audits". I would really like that. Extra money and a job I can wake up late for and do without talking to people.
More and more often I hear, "Yeah, thats exactly right" when I get second opinions on loan values. That feels good. I get to feel like an expert all day. Stereos, diamonds, gold, tools, speakers, amps, guitars... an expert at everything. Until I got some camera questions today. Then I got to feel like an idiot some more. But I did have a customer teach me the basics about gas and battery powered RC vehicles.. so that was fun.
Some lonely girl who comes in every now and again wants to be my friend. She wanted my phone number and gave me hers... she wants to invite me and Jesse out to dinner with her and her husband. She's so strangely lonely. Desperately lonely. She told me a story about being stabbed 12 times by an ex boyfriend once.
Thats what I call an "awkward" topic.
I hear these terrible stories from people... beatings, prison, drug use, theft, sick children, electric bills, homelessness, joblessness, terrible L&I suits,... everything under the sun.
And you can sometimes see these people's lives crumbling around them.
Nighttime drama characters have it "tough" when they have to face one hard decision,.. or have to go through one hard problem... real life doesn't take turns like a circle of Ninjas in a bad Kung-Fu movie... usually it tackles you like a college football team tackles a drunk 15 yr old girl. All at once and brutally.
When only one thing is going wrong in my life.... that means things are going good. Hehe
Im hungry. Jesse is packing.. I should probably follow suit.