this is the new year
So, this is it. I started my first 2009 dawn with a cup of freshly brewed espresso in my kitchen. (We bought an expresso machine last night.) So good. I could certainly start every morning of 2009 making espresso, topless in my kitchen with Brian rubbing my shoulders.
We're watching music videos on the couch with the dog now.
Going to grandma's soon.
What I like most about 2009 is that, for once, I don't feel like I'm running. From something. I'm not expecting everything to change. I'm not desperate for something new in my life. Not losing my mind over anything. More of the same would be really nice to be honest.
My thing about 2009, is hope. You can say what you will about him, I don't care if he comes through with any of it, all politicians are assholes and liars and cheaters, but at least the man can influence hope and that's what I saw in him. Hope. For a better tomorrow and sometimes that's all I need. Is hope. That something could happen. It doesn't mean I will be disappointed if nothing happens, it means at least I could dream it, at least I could think it possible. I think it's worth hoping a dreaming based on the fact that he got to where he is today.
I have amazing friends... when nothing else matters, it's me and Kristen and Katie sitting at her kitchen table wondering where the hell everyone else is and entertaining ourselves.
When everything seems crazy, it's me and Chelsea on the phone laughing, crying, telling each other what's right and wrong in the world.
When I feel alone, it's Brian and I, spooning in our bed, holding each other, telling each other how lucky we are.
When I'm feeling like something is missing, Jess sends me a text, telling me that her and Addison miss me.
When I sit in my living room, I look around at everything I've accomplished over the past year.
I have to get ready to go to grandma's now. Which means clothing lol.
I love you all. I hope you're as filled with hope as I am.
Ian White announces the winner of his tattoo contest today. Fingers crossed haha. I want to win so I can get my Christopher Walken tattoo!