random thoughts.
Last tuesday, i dropped by at the MScM orientation seminar for sophomore students. It was meant to attract sophomores to take management as their choice of course. I wasn't really required to attend the seminar but I felt it necessary since there are days when I felt confused and undecided of my future after college. But then instead of being "reenlightened" on why I took up management, attending the talk left me more depressed and confused than ever.
Two years ago, I was so sure of doing this, of my future, of who I want to become. But now, it seems that all the certanty I once had were all gone. I can't seem to find any sufficient reason on why I'm doing or studying the things I'm doing/studying right now. Watching the speakers talk with such passion and conviction, I thought: "hey, why am i not like them? Where did the passion and conviction I knew I once had go?" *sigh* There are moments when I thought what if I chose a course that is not analytical, but more philosphical and deeper in essence? Would it make me happier than what I am right now? It probably would considering that it would make my insights on life more profound and reflective. But then, it probably would not because I'm not really good in writing nor speaking and having insightful thoughts are useless if I can't express them clearly and apply to myself.
So, it all boils down to this. I'm stuck in something that I know fits my analytical capabilities but leaves me feeling empty and unfulfilled. Tsk. What a pity. ='(
Two years ago, I was so sure of doing this, of my future, of who I want to become. But now, it seems that all the certanty I once had were all gone. I can't seem to find any sufficient reason on why I'm doing or studying the things I'm doing/studying right now. Watching the speakers talk with such passion and conviction, I thought: "hey, why am i not like them? Where did the passion and conviction I knew I once had go?" *sigh* There are moments when I thought what if I chose a course that is not analytical, but more philosphical and deeper in essence? Would it make me happier than what I am right now? It probably would considering that it would make my insights on life more profound and reflective. But then, it probably would not because I'm not really good in writing nor speaking and having insightful thoughts are useless if I can't express them clearly and apply to myself.
So, it all boils down to this. I'm stuck in something that I know fits my analytical capabilities but leaves me feeling empty and unfulfilled. Tsk. What a pity. ='(