Easter Eggs, Part 4
Nine down, nine to go.
For Hermione, the world is a puzzle--jigsaw, crossword, labyrinth. Her mind is a quiet library of properly organised file cabinets, carefully alphabetised tomes and meticulous equations. Here, clocks tick placidly as information is totted up into solutions.
For Luna, the world is a realm of wonder. She dreams of upside-down runes, invisible beasts, hollow mountains that lead to vegetable kingdoms in the centre of the earth, the melodious, whispered singing of the dead.
Both live in a mystery. But for Hermione, the mystery must be solved eventually with accurate answers. For Luna, the questions--and the wonder--are enough.
***
Quidditch, Draco reflected, was a lot like life.
Most people were Chasers, pursuing seemingly large, important objectives that weren't worth half their effort. Keepers had goals they tried to protect from others. The Beaters brutally tried to keep others from achieving any goals at all.
The Seekers, though--they were the wild, crazy ones, the ones who took insane risks for a pure, glistening, magical prize fluttering out of reach.
Seekers fought for the only prize worth winning.
But, staring at the Dark Mark newly emblazoned on his arm, he wondered if he'd grasped the Snitch this time after all.
***
MEGILLAH
A/N: A megillah is a long, drawn-out story. It's also the name for the Book of Esther, which is read for Purim. Both meanings seemed appropriate.
The story that Willow summarises can be found here, http://www.holidays.net/purim/story2.htm, in considerably more formal language.
***
Xander shook his head, puzzled. "So let me get this straight, Willow. You have this celebration every spring because this guy Haman wanted to kill all of the Jews. Somehow I am completely failing to see the reason for a holiday."
Willow ran her fingers through her auburn hair. "Well, if he had succeeded in killage, there would not have been much of a reason to celebrate. That would have been...pretty much normal for my people, actually." She bowed her head and looked grave for a few minutes. "Only this time, things went unexpectedly well for our side. And that doesn't happen a lot. So we like to remember it."
Xander mulled this over, and helped himself to one of the fruit-filled triangular cookies Willow had baked for some reason. "Yes, I can kind of see that. So what was Haman? A vampire or a demon or--"
"No," sighed Willow. "He was just a creep."
"Ah. A very human monster. Worst kind. So what did he do? And how was he stopped?"
"Um..." Willow stared up at the ceiling of the Summers house and nibbled on a cookie. "Okay, there's this king, Ahasuerus, and he has this queen, Vashti, who is incredibly beautiful. And one day Ahasuerus comes to her and says, 'Vashti, I want you to dance for my ministers.' Which, since this was Persia, would have been a very...um...colourful kind of dance."
"Not the kind of thing that nice queens do, in other words."
Willow exhaled softly. "No, not exactly. So she refuses, knowing that at the very least this is going to cost her the crown. Ahasuerus completely loses it and asks his advisors what a good punishment would be. And one of them, Memuchan, says, 'Hey, I know, why don't you kill her for disobedience?' And Ahasuerus says"--here Willow spoke in a harsh, gruff tone--"'Hey, great idea.'" Willow switched back to her normal speaking voice. "So that's the end of Vashti."
"Still not seeing a lot to celebrate here..."
"Wait. It gets better. So eventually Ahasuerus wants to get married again, and being a man of incredible depth, he decides to pick a queen on the basis of a nation-wide beauty contest."
"And the winner of Miss Biblical Persia was?"
"Esther." Willow grinned. "She was a beautiful Jewish orphan who'd been raised by her uncle, Mordecai. And since she was an eligible maiden, she naturally had to participate in the beauty contest."
Xander glanced seriously at his friend. "This is beginning to sound very fairy tale-ish, Will."
"Anyway," said Willow, raising her voice as if to drown out Xander's doubts, "Esther goes to court. And every day, Mordecai goes to court too, and just happens to mention Esther's name in the hearing of this or that official. Between Esther and Mordecai, they both impress everyone, and Esther is crowned queen."
"Uh...all very interesting, Will, but I think we've gone kind of off the track. Remember Haman?"
"I'm getting to him! Okay. Esther has been queen for a while now. Years and years. And Haman becomes the chief advisor of the king. Now, Haman is a very not nice person at the best of times, and that would be bad ordinarily, but there's another problem as well. He's vain. Very, very vain."
"How vain?"
"The Master and the Mayor--combined."
"Great. Mister 'I want to rule or destroy the world' and Mister 'I just want to be a giant snake.'"
Willow grinned. "So one day, Haman's out in public, and everyone is bowing and scraping and kowtowing, and he is feeling great. And then he sees Esther's uncle, Mordecai. And Mordecai doesn't bow, because he's Jewish and only allowed to bow to God, and even if Haman doesn't know that he's not God...well, Mordecai's not confused.
"So Haman slams back into the palace and decides that since he's mad at one Jew, he's going to kill ALL Jews."
"And the world gains another poster child for sanity." Xander bit into another cookie. "So what happens next?"
"Haman casts lots to determine the day that all the Jews are going to die. 'Lots' in Hebrew is 'Purim.' Which is why the holiday is called Purim, or the Feast of Lots." Willow glanced at Xander's impatient face, and decided to hurry up a bit.
"So, the day of destruction is announced, and Mordecai, in sackcloth and ashes, goes to Esther and begs her to save her people. So Esther fasts for three days--and Mordecai gets the other Jews to also fast for three days--and then she invites the king and Haman to a private banquet...which goes over well until Haman has to go home and he sees Mordecai. Which pleases him so much that he starts building a gallows the next day."
"This whole thing is sounding counterproductive-ish."
"On the night of the first banquet," continued Willow, "Ahasuerus finds out that Mordecai saved him from an assassination plot, and he asks Haman, 'What should be done for the man the King wishes to reward?' And Haman, thinking that the king means him, says that the man should be garbed in royal clothing, and should ride upon a noble steed, and should be led through the city streets by an official proclaiming, 'Thus does the king honour those who serve him.'"
Xander groaned. "I bet he went nuclear when he found out this was for Mordecai."
"He was really not of the happy, no. Especially when his daughter, who thought that Mordecai was leading her father in the procession instead of the other way around, dumped garbage on him."
Xander winced.
"So. Second banquet. Esther tells the king about Haman hating Mordecai and wanting to kill all Jews. Then she says, 'Oh, and that edict ordering all the Jews hanged? That affects me too. Because see, honey, I'm Jewish.'
"And Haman is sitting there going, 'Ohhhh...shit.'
"Probably," Willow agreed with a wry smile. "Anyway, Mordecai became chief advisor in Haman's place...and Haman ended up being hanged on the gallows he'd built for the Jews. And since this kind of thing doesn't happen very often to genocidal bigots, we made a holiday of it."
Xander nodded enthusiastically. "Excellent idea. I approve. Sunnydale should have a day like that that points out that all the evil creatures who tried to take over the Hellmouth are--you know--dead. And there can be singing and dancing and partying and eating cookies. Like these." He gestured toward the half-empty platter.
"Haman-taschen."
Xander blinked. "You named cookies after the creep? No. They need a better name. Call 'em after Esther. Except that Esther-taschen doesn't sound great..."
"Her name's Hadassah in Hebrew." Willow pronounced it Hah-DAH-suh.
She thought for a minute, then whispered a name to herself. "Hadass-taschen. Hadass-taschen."
It sounded fine.
***
For Hermione, the world is a puzzle--jigsaw, crossword, labyrinth. Her mind is a quiet library of properly organised file cabinets, carefully alphabetised tomes and meticulous equations. Here, clocks tick placidly as information is totted up into solutions.
For Luna, the world is a realm of wonder. She dreams of upside-down runes, invisible beasts, hollow mountains that lead to vegetable kingdoms in the centre of the earth, the melodious, whispered singing of the dead.
Both live in a mystery. But for Hermione, the mystery must be solved eventually with accurate answers. For Luna, the questions--and the wonder--are enough.
***
Quidditch, Draco reflected, was a lot like life.
Most people were Chasers, pursuing seemingly large, important objectives that weren't worth half their effort. Keepers had goals they tried to protect from others. The Beaters brutally tried to keep others from achieving any goals at all.
The Seekers, though--they were the wild, crazy ones, the ones who took insane risks for a pure, glistening, magical prize fluttering out of reach.
Seekers fought for the only prize worth winning.
But, staring at the Dark Mark newly emblazoned on his arm, he wondered if he'd grasped the Snitch this time after all.
***
MEGILLAH
A/N: A megillah is a long, drawn-out story. It's also the name for the Book of Esther, which is read for Purim. Both meanings seemed appropriate.
The story that Willow summarises can be found here, http://www.holidays.net/purim/story2.htm, in considerably more formal language.
***
Xander shook his head, puzzled. "So let me get this straight, Willow. You have this celebration every spring because this guy Haman wanted to kill all of the Jews. Somehow I am completely failing to see the reason for a holiday."
Willow ran her fingers through her auburn hair. "Well, if he had succeeded in killage, there would not have been much of a reason to celebrate. That would have been...pretty much normal for my people, actually." She bowed her head and looked grave for a few minutes. "Only this time, things went unexpectedly well for our side. And that doesn't happen a lot. So we like to remember it."
Xander mulled this over, and helped himself to one of the fruit-filled triangular cookies Willow had baked for some reason. "Yes, I can kind of see that. So what was Haman? A vampire or a demon or--"
"No," sighed Willow. "He was just a creep."
"Ah. A very human monster. Worst kind. So what did he do? And how was he stopped?"
"Um..." Willow stared up at the ceiling of the Summers house and nibbled on a cookie. "Okay, there's this king, Ahasuerus, and he has this queen, Vashti, who is incredibly beautiful. And one day Ahasuerus comes to her and says, 'Vashti, I want you to dance for my ministers.' Which, since this was Persia, would have been a very...um...colourful kind of dance."
"Not the kind of thing that nice queens do, in other words."
Willow exhaled softly. "No, not exactly. So she refuses, knowing that at the very least this is going to cost her the crown. Ahasuerus completely loses it and asks his advisors what a good punishment would be. And one of them, Memuchan, says, 'Hey, I know, why don't you kill her for disobedience?' And Ahasuerus says"--here Willow spoke in a harsh, gruff tone--"'Hey, great idea.'" Willow switched back to her normal speaking voice. "So that's the end of Vashti."
"Still not seeing a lot to celebrate here..."
"Wait. It gets better. So eventually Ahasuerus wants to get married again, and being a man of incredible depth, he decides to pick a queen on the basis of a nation-wide beauty contest."
"And the winner of Miss Biblical Persia was?"
"Esther." Willow grinned. "She was a beautiful Jewish orphan who'd been raised by her uncle, Mordecai. And since she was an eligible maiden, she naturally had to participate in the beauty contest."
Xander glanced seriously at his friend. "This is beginning to sound very fairy tale-ish, Will."
"Anyway," said Willow, raising her voice as if to drown out Xander's doubts, "Esther goes to court. And every day, Mordecai goes to court too, and just happens to mention Esther's name in the hearing of this or that official. Between Esther and Mordecai, they both impress everyone, and Esther is crowned queen."
"Uh...all very interesting, Will, but I think we've gone kind of off the track. Remember Haman?"
"I'm getting to him! Okay. Esther has been queen for a while now. Years and years. And Haman becomes the chief advisor of the king. Now, Haman is a very not nice person at the best of times, and that would be bad ordinarily, but there's another problem as well. He's vain. Very, very vain."
"How vain?"
"The Master and the Mayor--combined."
"Great. Mister 'I want to rule or destroy the world' and Mister 'I just want to be a giant snake.'"
Willow grinned. "So one day, Haman's out in public, and everyone is bowing and scraping and kowtowing, and he is feeling great. And then he sees Esther's uncle, Mordecai. And Mordecai doesn't bow, because he's Jewish and only allowed to bow to God, and even if Haman doesn't know that he's not God...well, Mordecai's not confused.
"So Haman slams back into the palace and decides that since he's mad at one Jew, he's going to kill ALL Jews."
"And the world gains another poster child for sanity." Xander bit into another cookie. "So what happens next?"
"Haman casts lots to determine the day that all the Jews are going to die. 'Lots' in Hebrew is 'Purim.' Which is why the holiday is called Purim, or the Feast of Lots." Willow glanced at Xander's impatient face, and decided to hurry up a bit.
"So, the day of destruction is announced, and Mordecai, in sackcloth and ashes, goes to Esther and begs her to save her people. So Esther fasts for three days--and Mordecai gets the other Jews to also fast for three days--and then she invites the king and Haman to a private banquet...which goes over well until Haman has to go home and he sees Mordecai. Which pleases him so much that he starts building a gallows the next day."
"This whole thing is sounding counterproductive-ish."
"On the night of the first banquet," continued Willow, "Ahasuerus finds out that Mordecai saved him from an assassination plot, and he asks Haman, 'What should be done for the man the King wishes to reward?' And Haman, thinking that the king means him, says that the man should be garbed in royal clothing, and should ride upon a noble steed, and should be led through the city streets by an official proclaiming, 'Thus does the king honour those who serve him.'"
Xander groaned. "I bet he went nuclear when he found out this was for Mordecai."
"He was really not of the happy, no. Especially when his daughter, who thought that Mordecai was leading her father in the procession instead of the other way around, dumped garbage on him."
Xander winced.
"So. Second banquet. Esther tells the king about Haman hating Mordecai and wanting to kill all Jews. Then she says, 'Oh, and that edict ordering all the Jews hanged? That affects me too. Because see, honey, I'm Jewish.'
"And Haman is sitting there going, 'Ohhhh...shit.'
"Probably," Willow agreed with a wry smile. "Anyway, Mordecai became chief advisor in Haman's place...and Haman ended up being hanged on the gallows he'd built for the Jews. And since this kind of thing doesn't happen very often to genocidal bigots, we made a holiday of it."
Xander nodded enthusiastically. "Excellent idea. I approve. Sunnydale should have a day like that that points out that all the evil creatures who tried to take over the Hellmouth are--you know--dead. And there can be singing and dancing and partying and eating cookies. Like these." He gestured toward the half-empty platter.
"Haman-taschen."
Xander blinked. "You named cookies after the creep? No. They need a better name. Call 'em after Esther. Except that Esther-taschen doesn't sound great..."
"Her name's Hadassah in Hebrew." Willow pronounced it Hah-DAH-suh.
She thought for a minute, then whispered a name to herself. "Hadass-taschen. Hadass-taschen."
It sounded fine.
***