Hey Everybody
Hello again
Me here. I'm just posting cause...well acutally cause I'm feeling pretty down. I finally had that "crash" last night that I'd been anticipating, and ended up crying for about three hours straight without any real catalyst. I usually have issues with fearing abandoment, and now that's at its peak. I feel like it is imminent from certain directions and I'm not sure how I am going to deal with it. I keep messing up and I keep kicking myself for it. I mean, I had a good day out today with a couple friends at the museum, but I still have this feeling that's almost physical - almost like there's an anvil in the very centre of my chest. It feels like I"m back into one of my depression stages, where there's nothing to look forward to. I'm not really sure who to talk to about this either at the moment. Two people were supposed to give me calls yesterday but I guess both of them decided they didn't want to in the end, so that was a little bit disappointing on top of all this. Not really a big deal though. I don't wanna talk to my roommate either because only one of them is home, and it's the one that gets really sick of listening to other people when they have problems. I Just feel so goddamn worthless. I dont' even know what brought this on, so I"m also really frustrated!
I dunno, point is, I"m pretty down at the moment and if anybody out there is reading this, it'd be nice to just get maybe a link to a funny picture or maybe something cathartic, something good for lifting. Or if anybody wants to complain to me about something crappy in their life, I actually get a lot out of knowing that I"m not alone in days like this. Just..anything. I wish I was surrounded by the people I left back home right now.
Me here. I'm just posting cause...well acutally cause I'm feeling pretty down. I finally had that "crash" last night that I'd been anticipating, and ended up crying for about three hours straight without any real catalyst. I usually have issues with fearing abandoment, and now that's at its peak. I feel like it is imminent from certain directions and I'm not sure how I am going to deal with it. I keep messing up and I keep kicking myself for it. I mean, I had a good day out today with a couple friends at the museum, but I still have this feeling that's almost physical - almost like there's an anvil in the very centre of my chest. It feels like I"m back into one of my depression stages, where there's nothing to look forward to. I'm not really sure who to talk to about this either at the moment. Two people were supposed to give me calls yesterday but I guess both of them decided they didn't want to in the end, so that was a little bit disappointing on top of all this. Not really a big deal though. I don't wanna talk to my roommate either because only one of them is home, and it's the one that gets really sick of listening to other people when they have problems. I Just feel so goddamn worthless. I dont' even know what brought this on, so I"m also really frustrated!
I dunno, point is, I"m pretty down at the moment and if anybody out there is reading this, it'd be nice to just get maybe a link to a funny picture or maybe something cathartic, something good for lifting. Or if anybody wants to complain to me about something crappy in their life, I actually get a lot out of knowing that I"m not alone in days like this. Just..anything. I wish I was surrounded by the people I left back home right now.