i do excellent things with my spare time (and so does megan)

[gdgdbaby]

so earlier this afternoon pause and i were talking about random shit and we got to the subject of footballers - namely, famous footballers as they would be fifty years later, as grandfathers. this is our chat log :| focuses mainly on the spanish nt with cameos from bastian schweinsteiger & lukas podolski, and ryan babel LMAO. may grate against delicate sensibilities and be offensive to some :| click in at your own risk!

pause: http://media.tumblr.com/tumblr_l88ekmoDCM1qbu6uv.gif omg he has a book
gdgdbaby: lol yeah he wrote an autobiography i think
gdgdbaby: some time back
gdgdbaby: ~memoirs~
pause: lmao lmao awwww

gdgdbaby: lol dying cris named his son after himself
gdgdbaby: classy
pause: ..........LMAO REALLY?
gdgdbaby: http://www.guardian.co.uk/football/2010/jul/08/cristiano-ronaldo-son
gdgdbaby: HAHAHAHAA
pause: LMAO
gdgdbaby: DJFLGKSKGSFD
pause: ASDFLAJSHDF LMAO WHO IS HE
gdgdbaby: IKRRRRRRRR
gdgdbaby: I'M LIKE ...................
pause: LMAO LMAO LMAO YOU ARE MOST RIDICULOUS C.RON
gdgdbaby: STAY CLASSY CRIS..........
gdgdbaby: STAY CLASSY.......
pause: LMAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
gdgdbaby: LMAO I BET HE WAS JUST LIKE
gdgdbaby: EHHHHHH FUCK THIS
gdgdbaby: TOO LAZY
gdgdbaby: TO THINK OF A NAME
pause: LMAO
gdgdbaby: NAMING HIM AFTER MYSELF :|
pause: "MY NAME'S NOT BAD EITHER"
gdgdbaby: KAKA IN THE BG JUST LIKE ...........................
gdgdbaby: R U SRS RN
gdgdbaby: HUHUHU
gdgdbaby: I'M CRYING
gdgdbaby: HUHUHUHUHUHUHUHUUHUHUHUHUHU
pause: HUHUHU ASLKJDFAHSF LMAO KAKA
gdgdbaby: I'M CRYINGGGG
gdgdbaby: T___________T
gdgdbaby: FUCKING C.RON IDE

pause: wait does kaka have a daughter?
gdgdbaby: son!
gdgdbaby: luca
pause: IDR IF HE HAS CHILDREN -_-
pause: oh right lmao alshfjd
pause: kaka ;____________________________;
gdgdbaby: LMAOOOO sigh :(
pause: WHY IS HE ALREADY 28 ASFKHASDF
pause: WHY DOES HE GET AN INJURY AT 28 ADSFKASHDF
gdgdbaby: :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :(

gdgdbaby: dude if only
gdgdbaby: cris's child
gdgdbaby: was a girl
gdgdbaby: then she and luca could be like
gdgdbaby: n_n
pause:...screams
pause: SCREAMS
pause: WHAT IF THEY'RE GAY TOGETHER -_-
gdgdbaby: ~~~~~~~~~~~~
gdgdbaby: UHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
pause: omg kaka would be all
pause: son
gdgdbaby: LOLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL
gdgdbaby: IKR
gdgdbaby: SON I AM DISAPPOINT
pause: this is not the way of god
gdgdbaby: HAHAHAHHHAHA BASICALLY
pause: LMAO SON I AM DISAPPOINT ALSHFJD
pause: screams omg WHY DOES THIS SOUND LIKE A FANFIC OH MAN
gdgdbaby: HAHAHAHAHA

gdgdbaby: man i'd feel bad for kaka though :|
gdgdbaby: considering :|
gdgdbaby: you know :|
gdgdbaby: his beliefs and everything
gdgdbaby: SIGH

pause: no but yeah i think
pause: kaka would love to be a grandpa
gdgdbaby: AWWWWWWW LMAO
gdgdbaby: CAN YOU IMAGINE
gdgdbaby: SLDFKJGDLSFGJDF
gdgdbaby: CAN I BUY YOU A ~SOFTY DRINK
gdgdbaby: ALL THE TIME
pause: SCREAMS KAKA IN 50 YEARS ALSJFSAHDFASKDFH ROCKING ON THE CHAIR
pause: PREACHING ABOUT VIRGINITY
gdgdbaby: HAHAHAHHHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAA
gdgdbaby: AND LIKE
gdgdbaby: WE MET AT THE MARRIAGE AS VIRGINS
gdgdbaby: CAROLINE LIKE
gdgdbaby: ...................
pause: AND DRINKING JUICES!!!!!
gdgdbaby: LUCA LIKE DAD IDT THEY WANT TO HEAR ABOUT THIS....
pause: LMAO LUCA PROTECTING HIS CHILDREN
gdgdbaby: TOO YOUNG TO BE EDUCATED ABOUT ABSTINENCE..................
gdgdbaby : THANKS DAD BUT NO THANKS
pause: OMG KAKA WOULD BE SO RIDICULOUS AND LIKE THE OLD GRANDPA YOU ROLL YOUR EYES AT BUT LOVE IDK
gdgdbaby: SO CUTEEEEE

pause: screeeeeeeeams i like how we just fastforwarded 50 years and gave luca kids -_-
gdgdbaby: HAHAHAHAAHA
gdgdbaby: luca n__n
gdgdbaby: lmao can you imagine cris.... in fifty years...
gdgdbaby: STILL SLICKING BACK HIS FAUXHAWK LIKE EUROTRASH
gdgdbaby: GJ C.RON
pause: L M A O
gdgdbaby: TRYING TO HIDE HIS
gdgdbaby: ~RECEDING HAIRLINE~
pause: OMG HE'D SPOIL HIS GRANDCHILDREN/CHILDREN SO MUCH
gdgdbaby: LOLLLLLLLLLL OMG AWWWWWWW
pause: GUYS COME FOR A RIDE IN MY FANCY CAR
gdgdbaby: LIKE SUP I PICKED UP SOME
gdgdbaby: LANVIN FOR YOU
pause: his son like -_- dad -_-
gdgdbaby: ON THE WAY HERE
gdgdbaby: n____n
gdgdbaby: LMAOOOOOO BB CRIS LIKE ..... WIILT
gdgdbaby: STOP IT
pause: OMG I LOVE HIM ;_______; HE'D BE SUCH A GOOD GRANDPAPA
gdgdbaby: HIS GRANDKIDS WHINING LIKE GRANDPA CRIS IS SO MUCH COOLER THAN YOU DAD
pause: GRANDPA CRIS LET'S US RIDE IN THE FRONT
gdgdbaby: LMAOOO SHOTGUNNNN
pause: GRANDPA CRIS WON TROPHIES
gdgdbaby: AAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
gdgdbaby: GRANDPA CRIS THIS GRANDPA CRIS THAT
pause: SCREAMS RIGHT LMAO ASLKJDFHASDF
gdgdbaby: bb cris like -___-
pause: omg he'd love them so much ;_____________; omg omg
pause: LMAO CRIS JR ALL "...dad..."

gdgdbaby: OMG CRIS WOULD PASS ON HIS HORRIBLE
gdgdbaby: FASHION SENSE
gdgdbaby: BUY THE GRANDKIDS LIKE SHORT SHORTS
pause: GUYS THIS IS COOL STUFF TO BE WEARING :D
gdgdbaby: CRIS JR. LIKE BRB
gdgdbaby: BURNING
gdgdbaby: THESE
gdgdbaby: I HOPE CRIS JR DOESN'T INHERET HIS FATHER'S FASHION SENSE
pause: SCREAMS ASLFKAHDSF

pause: omg and then g-pa cris would have serious talks with them ;___________________________;
pause: all DON'T BE AFRAID TO DREAM BIG
gdgdbaby: ~INSPIRATIONAL~
pause: ;______________; AMBITION IS IMPORTANT ;_________;
pause: omg omg omg ;______________;
gdgdbaby: MOST IMPORTANTLY
gdgdbaby: DON'T DIVE
gdgdbaby: n_____n
pause: SO MOVED BY MY IDEA OF GPA C.RON WHAT IS THIS
pause: SCREAMS LMAO
gdgdbaby: UNLESS YOU KNOW YOU CAN GET AWAY WITH IT
gdgdbaby: n_________n
gdgdbaby: cris jr. like :||||||||||| WHAT ARE YOU TEACHING MY KIDS
pause: SCREEEEEEEEEEEEAMS aslkdfhasf OMG AND CAN YOU IMAGINE HIS SISTER
gdgdbaby: HAHAHHHAHAAHA KATIA
pause: "AWWWWWWWWWWW MY BABY BROTHER IS STILL LIKE THIS"
pause: "HE IS SUCH A GOOD MAN!!!"
pause: so moved by ronaldo family huhuhu ;_____;
gdgdbaby: cris jr.: aunt katia waylt
pause: screams forever sobs

pause: now i'm like picturing everyone as grandparents lakjdfhasdf
pause: this is bad -_-
gdgdbaby: HAHAHAHAHAHAHA
gdgdbaby: NO THIS IS SO GREAT
gdgdbaby: LET'S SEE WHO ELSE
gdgdbaby: OMG OKAY MESSI AS A GRANDPA
gdgdbaby: HE'D LIKE TAP THEM ON THE HEAD
pause: SCREAMS DOES MESSI EVEN HAVE CHILDREN
gdgdbaby: WHEN THEY WERE BEING LOUD
gdgdbaby: LIKE SHHHHHHHHHHHH
pause: LMAO LMAO LMAO LIKE THAT GIF
gdgdbaby: YESSSSSSSSS
gdgdbaby: LEARN RESPECT YOUNG ONES
gdgdbaby: B||||||
pause: OMG HE'D LOOK SO OLD ALSFJAHSDF
pause: HE'D BE LIKE 70 AND LOOK 80 oh messi your life
gdgdbaby: LMAOOOOO
pause: it is okay you are A+!!!!

gdgdbaby: oh
gdgdbaby: my
gdgdbaby: god
gdgdbaby: NANDO
gdgdbaby: THE BITCHFACED
gdgdbaby: GRANDFATHER
pause: SCREAMS ALSKDJFH
gdgdbaby: HIS GRANDKIDS WOULD BE SO SCARED OF HIM....
pause: NANDO IS MOST RIDICULOUS OKAY
gdgdbaby: UNTIL HE BROKE OUT THE FUCKING GRIN
gdgdbaby: THAT LOOKS LIKE IT WAS PHOTOSHOPPED
gdgdbaby: ONTO HIS FACE
gdgdbaby: IDE
pause: OMG IF HE EVER WENT INTO PUBLIC WITH HIS GKIDS
gdgdbaby: LMAO 5 FOOT RADIUS
gdgdbaby: AROUND HIM
pause: HE'D HOLD THEM AND LIKE BITCHFACE ALL THE PAPARAZZI seriously he does that with nora alskjfhasdf
pause: most ridiculous
gdgdbaby: ahahahahahahaahHAHAHAHAHAA
gdgdbaby: the pap like ........
pause: omg though he's like the cutest thing ever ;_____;
pause: WHAT IF HE TATTOOS THEIR NAMES ON HIS LIKE BACK ALSKJFHADSF
pause: oh nando <3
gdgdbaby: AWWWWWWW

gdgdbaby: bastian and lukas would be like... the two old grandpas at the nursing home who'd play pranks on everyone else
gdgdbaby: even if they were like confined to wheelchairs :|
pause: SCREEEEEEEEEAMS NURSING HOME ALSKJFHASDF
pause: LMAO LMAO LMAO
gdgdbaby: THEY'D FIND A WAY
gdgdbaby: SOMEHOW
pause: ROLLING AROUND THE NURSES
pause: CAN'T CATCH ME!!!
gdgdbaby: HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA
pause: I'M GOLDI POLDI!!
gdgdbaby: NURSES JUST LIKE ........................... WIILT
gdgdbaby: "DO WE HAVE TO SEPARATE YOU TWO"
gdgdbaby: "B||||"
pause: LMAO NURSES ALL WHY AM I WORKING HERE AGAIN ALSKFJHASD
gdgdbaby: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA

pause: omg sobs i can't even picture nando as a gpa
pause: he looks so young who is he
gdgdbaby: dude he really does
gdgdbaby: wiilt
pause: he'd teach them about english music and culture though ;____;
gdgdbaby: LMAOOOO
gdgdbaby: HAYYYY
pause: sobs AND HE SPENDS LIKE 5 HOURS PLAYING VIDEO GAMES WHO IS HE
gdgdbaby: teach them english slang
pause: FUCKING WANKER SLAHDFAS
gdgdbaby: THE FIRST WORDS HE TEACHES HIS GRANDKIDS
gdgdbaby: ARE YES
gdgdbaby: FUCK
gdgdbaby: YOU
gdgdbaby: OR SOMETHING
pause: USE THIS PHRASE WHEN YOU ARE UNHAPPY
gdgdbaby: AND HIS KIDS ARE LIKE SCANDALIZED
pause: :-O :-O :-O
gdgdbaby: HOW COULD YOU DAD B|
gdgdbaby: LOLOLL WIHLT
pause: LMAO OMG
pause: sobs he'd also like -_- wikipedia is useful in case you forget things -_-
gdgdbaby: LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL
gdgdbaby: SCREAMING
pause: -_- SKYPE WITH ME, GRANDCHILDREN. DO NOT FORGET. -_-
gdgdbaby: AAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
gdgdbaby: SO GREAT
gdgdbaby: IDE
pause: SCREAMS EVERY ONE OF THEM USES SKYPE IDE

pause: omg david villa all HEY GKIDS LET ME CONFIGURE YOUR BLACKBERRIES I'M THE BEST
gdgdbaby: LOL YESSSSS
gdgdbaby: xabi would be the most
gdgdbaby: GQMF
pause: gkids all -_- gpa this is old stuff -_-
gdgdbaby: GRANDPA
gdgdbaby: EVER
gdgdbaby: SUPER REGAL
pause: lmao XABIIIIIIIIII
gdgdbaby: LMAOOOO HE'D LIKE TEACH THEM HOW TO IDEK
gdgdbaby: BUTTER THEIR BISCUITS
gdgdbaby: AND DRINK TEA
pause: SCREEEEEEEEAMS HOW TO DRINK TEA
gdgdbaby: HAHAHAHAHAHA
gdgdbaby: YOU HOLD THE TEACUP LIKE THIS n___n
gdgdbaby: HE'D SHOW THEM DEXTER DSFLGJSDFG
gdgdbaby: YOUR GRANDPA USED TO LOOK LIKE THIS WHEN HE WAS YOUNG!!!!!!

pause: I REMEMBER THERE WAS LIKE AN ARTICLE ABOUT LFC PLAYERS HAVING MOVIE FESTIVALS AT XABI'S APARTMENT
gdgdbaby: HAHAHAHAHAHA OMGGGGG XABIIII SLDFG
pause: AND HE LOVES CASABLANCA APPARENTLY SOBS
pause: GKIDS THIS IS A GREAT MOVIE.
gdgdbaby: LOL OMGGGGG
gdgdbaby: GKIDS:
gdgdbaby: THIS
gdgdbaby: IS
gdgdbaby: A
gdgdbaby: BORING
gdgdbaby: MOVIE
pause: xabi: sit down and watch.
gdgdbaby: CAN WE GO WATCH -INSERT LATEST PIXAR MOVIE HERE-
gdgdbaby: xabi: no.
pause: gkids: oh okay :|
gdgdbaby: XABI: THIS IS A CLASSIC :|
pause: SOBS ;_______________________________;

gdgdbaby: who else is there
gdgdbaby: CESCCCCCCCCCCCC
pause: aslfkjashfaslfjhsdf cesc hates mushrooms
pause: he can't even look at them aslfkdhsadf
gdgdbaby: LOLOLOLOLOL OMG
pause: gkids eating mushrooms
pause: cesc: WALKS OUT OF ROOM
pause: gkids: ;____________;
gdgdbaby: gkids: D: what's wrong with grandpa
pause: carlota!!
gdgdbaby: gkids: SOB SOB DOES HE NOT LIKE US
pause: carlota: -_- ignore him -_-
gdgdbaby: YOUR GREATAUNT WILL GO AND BRING HIM BACK :|
gdgdbaby: EAT ALL YOUR MUSHROOMS BBS :|
pause: SCREEEEEEEEEAMS LMAO ASLFJDH

pause: OMG RAMOS
gdgdbaby: OH MY FUCKING GOD
pause: GKIDS, IT IS OKAY TO HAVE SEXUAL INSTINCTS.
gdgdbaby: C.RON TIMES TWO
pause: IT IS ONLY NATURAL
gdgdbaby: want to know why your granddad used to be called a horse
gdgdbaby: ;) ;) ;)
gdgdbaby: his son: DAD GO AWAY
gdgdbaby: LOLOLOL
pause: RAMOS MAKES HIS GKIDS HEADBANDS WITH THEIR NAMES ON THEM
gdgdbaby: OH
gdgdbaby: MY
gdgdbaby: GOD
pause: NOW YOU CAN BE LIKE GPA :D
gdgdbaby: SJFLGKJSDFGSF LMAOOOOOOOOOOO
gdgdbaby: HE BUYS THEM BOTTLES OF HAIR GEL ETC
gdgdbaby: SUPER TIGHT BUTTON UPS

gdgdbaby: c.ron would also buy his gkids his own jerseys :|
pause: dies aldkjfhalskfahsdf lmao
pause: GPA'S NAME :D
gdgdbaby: HAHAHAHAHAHA
pause: your dad's name too :D
gdgdbaby: LOL IRL
gdgdbaby: cris jr: :| you have no shame do you

pause: omg though everyone would teach their gkids about the passion of something ;____________; and to give back ;____________; charity work ;__________________;
gdgdbaby: awwwwww
gdgdbaby: so cute
pause: omg and talk about old games ;______;
pause: until their gkids are like
pause: gpa we heard about this
gdgdbaby: IDC ABOUT FOOTBALL ANYMORE
pause: 100 times
gdgdbaby: LMAOOOOOO
pause: LMAO SCREAMS ALDSHJF
gdgdbaby: TELL US STORIES ABOUT OTHER STUFF B|
pause: GPAS: SHUSH I AM REMINISCING

gdgdbaby: THEY HAVE LIKE
gdgdbaby: ANNUAL MEETUPS
gdgdbaby: TO TALK ABOUT
gdgdbaby: THE GOOD OLD DAYS
pause: SCREAMS ALSFKDJAHSLFKDJASFH
gdgdbaby: AHAHAHAHAHAHHAA
pause: AND THEN PLAY EACH OTHER IN CARD GAMES IDE
gdgdbaby: POKER AND SHIT
gdgdbaby: xabi has like the best poker face

pause: SCREAMS XABI STILL BEATING ARBELOA AT TRIVIA
gdgdbaby: YESSSSSSSSS
pause: TAKES PICTURES
pause: RYAN BABEL TWEETS THEM ALL ASDFKLJHASDF
gdgdbaby: (1:17:53 PM)
pause: OMG RYAN BABEL TWEETING FROM HIS ROCKING CHAIR
gdgdbaby: LOL STILL TELLING HIS
gdgdbaby: RIDIC
gdgdbaby: STORIES
pause: "sittin wit my gson he looks good #NOHOMO"
gdgdbaby: LOL OMG WHY
gdgdbaby: IS IT LIKE THIS
pause: #LEGOOOOOOO
gdgdbaby: #SHOOOOO
pause: ASFJASF SCREAMS BABEL HE IS SO RIDICULOUS
pause: LMAO PIMPING OUT RAP MSUIC
gdgdbaby: LOLOLOLOL
gdgdbaby: FROM LIKE
gdgdbaby: THE SIXTIES....
pause: SCREAMS ALDSKFJHASDF
pause: "i got a story to tell u bout my gkids"
gdgdbaby: HAHAHAHHAHA
gdgdbaby: HIS GRANDKIDS LIKE
gdgdbaby: ALL UNFOLLOW HIM
gdgdbaby: "SRY GRANDPA YOU SPAM TOO MUCH B|"
pause: L M A O
gdgdbaby: RYAN BABEL LIKE :||||||| NO RESPECT
gdgdbaby: FROM YOUNGSTERS
gdgdbaby: THESE DAYS
gdgdbaby: IDGI
gdgdbaby: SMH
pause: SCREAMS BABEL ADLKFJAHSDF OMG I CAN'T EVEN PICTURE HIM GETTING OLD

we are really ridiculous :|