destiny: like can you imagine the seagulls stealing your lunch.
my heart hurts so bad.
i finally broke down and cried & screamed a lot tonight.
1st i was supposed to go hang out tonight with my friends so i blew off any other plans i had & once again got my hopes up just to find out were not going. && i didnt even find out until 9. so my whole day was a big waste. && i didnt get to see people i wanted to see.
2nd my mom called me while i was across the street watching Garden State with Disaster and goes i have bad news for you. so im thinking oh god what now. come to find out my grandma & uncle our moving in with us. granted i love them but i really like being by myself. like most people hate it, i love it. now i wont have time alone at all whatsover nor is there any room in my damn house.
3rd my mom starts yelling at me saying i need to get over my problems & going on & on & on. so i finally started screaming at her & i havent done that since she kicked bart out which was over a year ago i think. so yea ive only ever been alone in this house for about a year. seriously i hate my mom. you people dont understand the life i have. im sure you think ohh your just mad because shes yelling at you but believe my theres a hell of a lot more. for once in my life i want a fucking normal life. can i please just get that.
4th then as i was crying i realized i have nothing. everybody gets what they want & i have shit. im not talking about physical possessions either. i just got my heartbroken like 2-3 weeks ago & im still recovering from it & the guy i actually kind of have a crush on has a girlfriend & the other guy i really like has a girlfriend too so its really gay. i mean granted yes there just guys but thats who you get affection from. my mom sure as hell doesnt do anything to even acknowledge me accept when she wants me to do something for her. && my friends hug me & tell me they love me but thats not what im looking for.
i really just want to move out,
i want to be on my own.
oh & my 18th birthday is coming up & of course im not doing anything.
thats what i get for having the greatest mom in the world.
& i know if i say i want to go out with friends shell say no its my 18th bday or shell just make me fell like shit.
oh & just so you realize im not going through a typical teenage phase, my family doesnt care for my mom either & theyve straight out told me that.
the only thing im looking forward to is the show saturday with my friends.
im so glad i have them.
it gets me away from people.
&& theres a game friday but i really dont know if i want to go.
im sure drama will happen there too.
but i really want to see someone so ill only go because of him.
& another thing is school is so stressful for me.
my schedule is awful.
look for yourself.
bible
american history
american sign language
algebra 2
english 3
business math
english 2
yearbook
2 english's & 2 math's both of which are my worst subjects.
while i was in the middle of bawling my eyes out destiny came in and talked about seagulls stealing her food & then she blinded herself.
i love her to death.
i think i would have died tonight without her here.
ps.
destiny,
when you left my mom goes so what were you really going to do tonight.
& i was like go out to eat mom.
& she goes are you sure you wont going to hook up with a guy because your really overreacting & getting upset for no reason.
& im like hey mom fuck you, let me tell you im a slut & im going ot make out & have sex with every guy im friends with.
its funny how whenever i go out with friends you instantly think im going to hook up with a guy but the best part is you dont know any of my friends at all whatsoever besides the ones you hear me telling people about or the ones i bring home which have always been girls.
shes utterly ridiculous.
i finally broke down and cried & screamed a lot tonight.
1st i was supposed to go hang out tonight with my friends so i blew off any other plans i had & once again got my hopes up just to find out were not going. && i didnt even find out until 9. so my whole day was a big waste. && i didnt get to see people i wanted to see.
2nd my mom called me while i was across the street watching Garden State with Disaster and goes i have bad news for you. so im thinking oh god what now. come to find out my grandma & uncle our moving in with us. granted i love them but i really like being by myself. like most people hate it, i love it. now i wont have time alone at all whatsover nor is there any room in my damn house.
3rd my mom starts yelling at me saying i need to get over my problems & going on & on & on. so i finally started screaming at her & i havent done that since she kicked bart out which was over a year ago i think. so yea ive only ever been alone in this house for about a year. seriously i hate my mom. you people dont understand the life i have. im sure you think ohh your just mad because shes yelling at you but believe my theres a hell of a lot more. for once in my life i want a fucking normal life. can i please just get that.
4th then as i was crying i realized i have nothing. everybody gets what they want & i have shit. im not talking about physical possessions either. i just got my heartbroken like 2-3 weeks ago & im still recovering from it & the guy i actually kind of have a crush on has a girlfriend & the other guy i really like has a girlfriend too so its really gay. i mean granted yes there just guys but thats who you get affection from. my mom sure as hell doesnt do anything to even acknowledge me accept when she wants me to do something for her. && my friends hug me & tell me they love me but thats not what im looking for.
i really just want to move out,
i want to be on my own.
oh & my 18th birthday is coming up & of course im not doing anything.
thats what i get for having the greatest mom in the world.
& i know if i say i want to go out with friends shell say no its my 18th bday or shell just make me fell like shit.
oh & just so you realize im not going through a typical teenage phase, my family doesnt care for my mom either & theyve straight out told me that.
the only thing im looking forward to is the show saturday with my friends.
im so glad i have them.
it gets me away from people.
&& theres a game friday but i really dont know if i want to go.
im sure drama will happen there too.
but i really want to see someone so ill only go because of him.
& another thing is school is so stressful for me.
my schedule is awful.
look for yourself.
bible
american history
american sign language
algebra 2
english 3
business math
english 2
yearbook
2 english's & 2 math's both of which are my worst subjects.
while i was in the middle of bawling my eyes out destiny came in and talked about seagulls stealing her food & then she blinded herself.
i love her to death.
i think i would have died tonight without her here.
ps.
destiny,
when you left my mom goes so what were you really going to do tonight.
& i was like go out to eat mom.
& she goes are you sure you wont going to hook up with a guy because your really overreacting & getting upset for no reason.
& im like hey mom fuck you, let me tell you im a slut & im going ot make out & have sex with every guy im friends with.
its funny how whenever i go out with friends you instantly think im going to hook up with a guy but the best part is you dont know any of my friends at all whatsoever besides the ones you hear me telling people about or the ones i bring home which have always been girls.
shes utterly ridiculous.