I haven't written on here lately...
So there have been a lot of things that have happened to me or to people around me over the last week that have really had me thinking about some stuff. Also, I don't think I have been as excited about anything for a long, long time as I am about going camping. It's a great feeling; kinda like that feeling you have right before you kiss someone for the first time. There's anticipation. There's a little apprehension. But mostly there's a lot of hope that this is going to be really good. But what's been on my mind is what makes people really feel alive?
Over the last week people have passed away, people have shown extreme kindness to others, people have expressed to me how they feel like they are in a state of limbo here in Oxford and my dad congratulated me for finally taking the last step into becoming an adult for real. A lot has happened and it has spurred a lot of thought.
This semester has been interesting so far to say the least. Extremely trying would be a better way to put it. A lot about this school year has left me wondering why I'm even here. And just like every other semester, the further I get into it, the less I feel alive. I get into my routines, into the monotony; and the glow of life just fades.
I hate that.
I don't want my life to be a series of days on end that never really culminate into anything. I want everything to be in the superlative. I want to go all out. Succeed big or fail big. I want to love like it's the air I breathe. I want to smile like it makes a difference to someone. I don't want to merely exist.
This camping trip has made me get out of that for an instant. Some people have laughed because I've gotten all my fly fishing gear together lately and put it all on at least once a week for the last month. I will just sit there and think about being on the river as the sun is rising and the bait fish are starting to run, waking up the trout and smelling cold air come through the trees and across the water. Standing there, with my fly rod in hand enjoying the world as God intended it.
Peaceful, quiet, beautiful; pure communion with God.
That awakens my soul. That is the face of God. That is His love and I can't wait to bask in His glow. I have a great group of friends, a beautiful park to spend a weekend in, and smores just waiting to be made over the fire. It's the culmination that makes His creation so perfect. And I am thankful for that.
But here's what I really want to know: what is it that makes each of you know life is worth living?
Serioulsy, there's so many of you I really want to know more deeply; please respond.
Over the last week people have passed away, people have shown extreme kindness to others, people have expressed to me how they feel like they are in a state of limbo here in Oxford and my dad congratulated me for finally taking the last step into becoming an adult for real. A lot has happened and it has spurred a lot of thought.
This semester has been interesting so far to say the least. Extremely trying would be a better way to put it. A lot about this school year has left me wondering why I'm even here. And just like every other semester, the further I get into it, the less I feel alive. I get into my routines, into the monotony; and the glow of life just fades.
I hate that.
I don't want my life to be a series of days on end that never really culminate into anything. I want everything to be in the superlative. I want to go all out. Succeed big or fail big. I want to love like it's the air I breathe. I want to smile like it makes a difference to someone. I don't want to merely exist.
This camping trip has made me get out of that for an instant. Some people have laughed because I've gotten all my fly fishing gear together lately and put it all on at least once a week for the last month. I will just sit there and think about being on the river as the sun is rising and the bait fish are starting to run, waking up the trout and smelling cold air come through the trees and across the water. Standing there, with my fly rod in hand enjoying the world as God intended it.
Peaceful, quiet, beautiful; pure communion with God.
That awakens my soul. That is the face of God. That is His love and I can't wait to bask in His glow. I have a great group of friends, a beautiful park to spend a weekend in, and smores just waiting to be made over the fire. It's the culmination that makes His creation so perfect. And I am thankful for that.
But here's what I really want to know: what is it that makes each of you know life is worth living?
Serioulsy, there's so many of you I really want to know more deeply; please respond.