Your naughty words
Written for KakaIru Kink Meme
Request: "Kakashi likes dirty talk, the filthier, the better. Iruka is really, really bad at it. I'd love it if Iruka isn't bad at dirty talk because he's OMG so sweet/innocent/sheltered/virginal/prudish/etc & etc - he feels SILLY talking dirty."
Pairing: Kakashi x Iruka
Warning: Yaoi (male x male), smut, crack
Rating: M
Disclaimer: I do not own Kakashi or Iruka
Summary: Kakashi wants Iruka to talk dirty in bed...
Your naughty words
Iruka stared at the man lying in front of him. They were bed, him and Kakashi, enjoying a post-coital talk and the subject was in fact sex. Or rather, wishes that involved sex, for next time they ended up in bed. Which would probably be the very next day if he knew Kakashi...
"Dirty talk?" Iruka repeated what his lover had just told him. By the looks of it, Kakashi was dead serious.
"Yes. Really dirty talking, coming from your mouth please." That bored face and voice became warmer when he directed a soft, hopeful smile Iruka's way. Kakashi's dark eye that was open twinkled from the mere thought of what words might be said in that throaty voice. He practically purred from that vision.
Propping up his pillow under his chin so he could see the man better, Iruka licked his lips and furrowed his brows in contemplation. It wasn't that he was shy in that way. They had been together for a couple of months now, and that honeymoon phase where they blushed just from looking at each other was pretty much over. Their relationship was solid, they were both grown men and thus any strange bedroom requests were in fact okay.
"I've... never done that before..." He confessed, scratching his cheek with a crooked smile.
"That's fine, just give it your best. You're good with words, I'm sure you'll manage." Kakashi smiled brighter before reaching out to pull his lover to his chest where he nuzzled his neck. Iruka couldn't contain his laughter and clung to the man. Well, there was no harm in trying he supposed...
He had been right; Kakashi was not able to keep his hands to himself the following day. As soon as both of them were done with their shinobi duties, they were on each other. It seemed that the very idea of hearing nasty words excited him to the point where Iruka hadn't even managed to take his sandals off, before Kakashi flung him over his shoulder and raced to their bed.
Iruka hit the mattress with a thump and his lover was already taking his shirt off when he opened his eyes and the world stopped spinning. Kakashi was grinning like a wolf and clearly, Iruka was his prey. And he actually found himself smiling back. He did like it when his man got that hungry look in his eyes. Iruka mimicked Kakashi and took his own vest and turtleneck off, yet he knew what he had agreed to last night and also understood that this was where he would be put to the test.
Finally both of them naked; they embraced under the cover, kissing and touching and completely lost in their passion. They hadn't bothered closing the curtain and it was barely evening but they really didn't care. Even if the Hokage herself jumped by their window, they would be very reluctant to stop what they were currently occupied with. And Kakashi was wearing a hint of his favorite cologne today he noticed, it made Iruka bury his nose in the crook of the man's neck and spread his legs open for him in eager invitation.
"Iruka..." Kakashi breathed out against his cheek, hot air burning his skin. His lover moaned in response.
"Iruka...?" He tried again, a little louder now and this time the other one got it, opening his eyes as realization hit Iruka.
"Oh, right..." Iruka murmured to himself and searched his brain for any sentences that would hopefully further entice the man in his arms.
"Ah, Kakashi... you... you are so... big!" He tried, his senses keen to register his lover's reaction.
"Really?" Kakashi coaxed him, nibbling on Iruka's lobe while positioning himself between his legs.
"Yes, it's... very... mind-blowing." He continued, feeling his confidence fade by each word he uttered out loud. Was this really considered sexy?
"...Oh?..." The man didn't stop his movements, he continued to shower Iruka with touches and was now pressing his erection to that blissful entrance.
"Oh Kakashi..." He was really starting to feel stupid now. Iruka's brain spat out something that he had once heard in a questionable movie that Mizuki had showed him when they were teens. "... it's like a... one eyed sea monster diving into me."
As soon as those words left him, Umino Iruka concluded that yes; this was completely ridiculous. He just wanted to wrap it up and go back to simple moans and groans.
He felt Kakashi either groan or cough, he couldn't really tell. Either way some kind of strained noise was heard. If his lover hated it, he would just tell Iruka to be stop right? So he continued, although rather unwillingly.
"I want it, your sea monster... yeah baby, give me your monster!" Iruka half-shouted, hoping his lack of enthusiasm wasn't extremely evident in his voice. For some reason, all he could think about were monsters now so that was what he stuck too. Despite some tiny voice, somewhere in his mind, telling him that monsters probably weren't all that hot in bed.
Kakashi's face was hidden but he could feel him pressing against his inner thigh. The erection was still there so that was also a good sign. The man surfaced from Iruka's neck and leered down at him. "Never heard anyone call it that before," he chuckled and pushed at Iruka's knee so he would get easier access. He reached towards the bed table and grabbed the jar of lube, spreading its content onto his 'sea monster'. "You want it, you got it baby."
And with that he pushed inside, stirring up a sea storm in that small bedroom.
After the sex came pillow talk, or evaluation as it was this time. Iruka lay on his man's chest and enjoyed the afterglow that followed that crazy talk and workout. "So... how was the... talk?" One part of him wanted Kakashi to have liked it while another part wanted him to have hated it so he wouldn't have to do it ever again.
Kakashi stroked Iruka's hair and stalled for time with a reflective; "Hmmm... You're getting there..." He assured, not wanting to create a fuss now. It had taken him some willpower and a lot of love not to start laughing when he heard poor Iruka talk dirty. Luckily, his body liked Iruka no matter what he said so keeping his interest alive wasn't hard. Sea monster, really? He didn't even want to ask where that came from. Because he knew that his lover had tried yet unfortunately, despite Iruka being good with words, naughty words were not his forte. So he was vague, instead of angering this fierce school teacher and risk getting his head pulled off by him.
Iruka sighed part relieved, part annoyed that he hadn't done as well as he had hoped. "Next time, I'm choosing the sex game."
The man nodded in agreement. "Fair enough."
A couple of days later, the teacher was in the classroom getting ready for today's headache in the form of teaching brats How To Not Die. Rummaging through his bag he picked up some folders and scrolls, noticing a thick brown book he did not recognize. Picking it up he read the title; 'The Way Of The Tongue - Pleasuring Your Other half With Sizzling Words.' That book spent the rest of its very short life as target practice for hyperactive ten year olds.
The end