The reasons found decoys and this is holding me back....

[gayer_than_aids]

Hmmm... I wish I were listening to the smiths right now but I'm not... I'm listening to some random blackman ramble about college and the "massachusetts cariculum standards"... I was thinking... and something I don't understand is why I get called a slut... or "permiscuous"... there's no basis for these comments I hear about me being a slut... I've hardly been intimate with anyone at all... I don't know why it bothers me... People have this expectation that I am going to fuck them over... that isn't true either

I have not been feeling so hott lately... mabey it's because what people say about me... but it's ususally a bit deeper than that... I wish I were really shallow and had alot of money to spend on useless things I would never need and I had tons of shallow boring friends... I wish I had no depth at all... and I never had to worry about anything except what I looked like... because the depth I have just forces me to think... and I hate thinking about things...

I have been lying alot lately... and it makes me feel guilty even after I tell people I lied... It's amusing then it just makes me feel guilty... because i remember it's wrong... I do it to Matthew alot... It isn't very nice and I'm going to stop... sorry for this boring rambling entry... "I always sound full of shit"

<33 Harmony-Ann <33