First Quarter of 2009
My word for the first quarter of 2009 has been: suck. As bad as 2008 seemed, 2009 has sucked harder and more persistently. There has only been one other time in my life when I have been this completely frazzled. It’s where your legs are shaky and you don’t know if it’s because you’re so tired or because the ground isn’t as stable as you thought it was.
The center of it is work. I kept trying to type out some-or-all of the story behind the drama, but it’s not really fit for a public blog and I don’t like the concept of a private one. Suffice it to say that our now-previous office manager screwed us out of tens of thousands of dollars and left the books and files in such complete disarray that I have barely scratched the surface after three 60 hour work weeks. And yes, some of this happened on my watch, but it’s largely because I inherited the day-to-day operations of a fairly flawed business and was too overloaded to even think about looking into whether I needed to be more aggressive about changing things.
That I could deal with. However, an external bit of government-beyond-idiocy-ruling has us scrambling to complete our taxes as quickly as possible. Unfortunately, this is being projected at me by the same guy who put the way-we-do-business in place. It has been hard not to project my anger and frustration at him and he’s got his own set of problems. On top of this, there have been a series of “things you don’t expect to go wrong” happening at the same time. Things like our payroll process not working. The company is not in any danger. My sanity, sleep, and stress levels are another story.
My escape from this is 4-6 hours sleep between helping take care of a 4-year-old that pushes my buttons, a 1.5-year-old that enjoys causing trouble far more than her brother ever did, and a wife that is often too overwhelmed with other responsibilities to be able to do her share of the housework, much less mine. Oh, and all of us have been sick with sinus and/or periodic stomach issues for the majority of 2009.
Meanwhile, my dad, who had been in and out of the hospital with severe health issues has finally been home for a while. However, I can’t go see him to help out like I said I would because (a) I’ve been just this side of sick and his immune system is weak and (b) I’m working all the time now anyway.
On top of this, my pool game has collapsed from lack of time to practice, my wrist was injured from being too tired and distracted during my weight set, my shot at bringing some relevancy to my photography hobby got overwhelmed by people who became too busy to be able to follow through, and throwing a party to which only 3 of the 8 RSVPs showed up (out of the 20+ invited). I’m also having a hard time not taking out my frustration on my children.
Tonight, I decided to look at my astrological chart. I had a hunch that Saturn was in play - the planet of hard lessons forcing you to clean house in the areas you don’t want to pay attention to. Sure enough, Saturn is dancing on my natal Uranus/Pluto conjunction (since October, when my dad’s problems began) AND Uranus has just begun dancing on my natal Saturn. Oh, and these places are directly opposed to each other in my chart. Descriptions of these transits involve words like “unsettling”, “bolt of lightning”, “feeling out of control”, and “squishing the free spirit”. They should clear around June 2010.
Of course, it isn’t just me, it’s my friends and family, too. As I described to one friend, it feels like that moment in Star Wars 1 where all of the sub-plots were simultaneously drifting into the dark side; right before the little twerp that couldn’t act blew up reactor. Here’s a thumbnail of what’s been happening to my friends and family.
- An elderly parent refusing to take care of himself.
- A speeding ticket leading to the search and seizure of drugs and an unregistered firearm.
- A car accident leading to a broken back.
- A diagnosis of lymphoma.
- A marriage teetering on divorce.
- A staph infection.
- A stolen wallet with the money for the electric bill inside.
- An eviction.
- Persistent neurological symptoms requiring an MRI where you’re afraid of what you’re going to find.
- A family business going through major lawsuit to recover from selling part of it to some oaf who screwed up everything.
- The purchasing of a fantastic franchise opportunity, only to have the parent corporation turn into complete idiots after the sale went through.
- A grandparent living nearby going from friendly to paranoid in a matter of months.
- Having the first good, long-term relationship in a very long time collapse.
The amazing thing is… none of my problems or my friends’ problems really have much to do with the economy. I’m still waiting for some aspect of that to strike (beyond shredding my retirement savings to bits).
On the GOOD side of 2009, I have managed to do weights 3-4 times a week (except for a few where I was injured). I’ve also managed to keep my weight not only under my threshold of 225, but under 220 (thanks in part to a violent bout of stomach flu). The one negative on my working out is that my adjustable dumbbells only go to 45 lbs and I’ve maxed them out on about half of my exercises. Not sure what I’m going to do to make progress (beyond more reps).
So, this is how I spent my evening off (when I should have been at work). I just needed to vent. It’s one of those posts where you think about it for about a week beforehand and it all just needs to come out. So here it is. Now, time for a few hours sleep before heading back in, assuming my daughter stays asleep.
The center of it is work. I kept trying to type out some-or-all of the story behind the drama, but it’s not really fit for a public blog and I don’t like the concept of a private one. Suffice it to say that our now-previous office manager screwed us out of tens of thousands of dollars and left the books and files in such complete disarray that I have barely scratched the surface after three 60 hour work weeks. And yes, some of this happened on my watch, but it’s largely because I inherited the day-to-day operations of a fairly flawed business and was too overloaded to even think about looking into whether I needed to be more aggressive about changing things.
That I could deal with. However, an external bit of government-beyond-idiocy-ruling has us scrambling to complete our taxes as quickly as possible. Unfortunately, this is being projected at me by the same guy who put the way-we-do-business in place. It has been hard not to project my anger and frustration at him and he’s got his own set of problems. On top of this, there have been a series of “things you don’t expect to go wrong” happening at the same time. Things like our payroll process not working. The company is not in any danger. My sanity, sleep, and stress levels are another story.
My escape from this is 4-6 hours sleep between helping take care of a 4-year-old that pushes my buttons, a 1.5-year-old that enjoys causing trouble far more than her brother ever did, and a wife that is often too overwhelmed with other responsibilities to be able to do her share of the housework, much less mine. Oh, and all of us have been sick with sinus and/or periodic stomach issues for the majority of 2009.
Meanwhile, my dad, who had been in and out of the hospital with severe health issues has finally been home for a while. However, I can’t go see him to help out like I said I would because (a) I’ve been just this side of sick and his immune system is weak and (b) I’m working all the time now anyway.
On top of this, my pool game has collapsed from lack of time to practice, my wrist was injured from being too tired and distracted during my weight set, my shot at bringing some relevancy to my photography hobby got overwhelmed by people who became too busy to be able to follow through, and throwing a party to which only 3 of the 8 RSVPs showed up (out of the 20+ invited). I’m also having a hard time not taking out my frustration on my children.
Tonight, I decided to look at my astrological chart. I had a hunch that Saturn was in play - the planet of hard lessons forcing you to clean house in the areas you don’t want to pay attention to. Sure enough, Saturn is dancing on my natal Uranus/Pluto conjunction (since October, when my dad’s problems began) AND Uranus has just begun dancing on my natal Saturn. Oh, and these places are directly opposed to each other in my chart. Descriptions of these transits involve words like “unsettling”, “bolt of lightning”, “feeling out of control”, and “squishing the free spirit”. They should clear around June 2010.
Of course, it isn’t just me, it’s my friends and family, too. As I described to one friend, it feels like that moment in Star Wars 1 where all of the sub-plots were simultaneously drifting into the dark side; right before the little twerp that couldn’t act blew up reactor. Here’s a thumbnail of what’s been happening to my friends and family.
- An elderly parent refusing to take care of himself.
- A speeding ticket leading to the search and seizure of drugs and an unregistered firearm.
- A car accident leading to a broken back.
- A diagnosis of lymphoma.
- A marriage teetering on divorce.
- A staph infection.
- A stolen wallet with the money for the electric bill inside.
- An eviction.
- Persistent neurological symptoms requiring an MRI where you’re afraid of what you’re going to find.
- A family business going through major lawsuit to recover from selling part of it to some oaf who screwed up everything.
- The purchasing of a fantastic franchise opportunity, only to have the parent corporation turn into complete idiots after the sale went through.
- A grandparent living nearby going from friendly to paranoid in a matter of months.
- Having the first good, long-term relationship in a very long time collapse.
The amazing thing is… none of my problems or my friends’ problems really have much to do with the economy. I’m still waiting for some aspect of that to strike (beyond shredding my retirement savings to bits).
On the GOOD side of 2009, I have managed to do weights 3-4 times a week (except for a few where I was injured). I’ve also managed to keep my weight not only under my threshold of 225, but under 220 (thanks in part to a violent bout of stomach flu). The one negative on my working out is that my adjustable dumbbells only go to 45 lbs and I’ve maxed them out on about half of my exercises. Not sure what I’m going to do to make progress (beyond more reps).
So, this is how I spent my evening off (when I should have been at work). I just needed to vent. It’s one of those posts where you think about it for about a week beforehand and it all just needs to come out. So here it is. Now, time for a few hours sleep before heading back in, assuming my daughter stays asleep.