Just some thoughts
So, long time since the last one and I figured what better time to do it than right after September 11th? Seems to be an important day in our lives... full of all sorts of emotions. Today, while at work, I got to watch something on Discovery titled something like The Plan That Fought Back. Basically it was about the one flight that missed its target. It was a story told by the suriving husbands, wives, parents and children. It was something that you couldn't just turn your head away from. You can think about it now and the facts say that it happened 4 years ago, but then you watch something like that and your heart breaks again, your feels swell and all over again you relive those thoughts in your mind. I still remember where I was standing when it happened. How many events in your life that happened 4 years ago can affect you so profoundly? But, back then it was a feeling of disbelief... today, for me, it was a feeling of acheivement and pride. Anyone can sucker punch someone else, that's cowardly. But, it's in how you respond that tells the world who you are. I am proud of my country.
So, that's just one of the things. That was 2001. Now, lets move on to 2002. Tim. One of my really good friends. September 11th, 2002 he died in a car accident. The details were sketchy because he was the only car. But, details are irrelevant. Tim died. And I can still remember looking at him in the casket. I still remember walking into the funeral home the first time. I still remember the first person to greet me, I still remember that empty feeling. Tim was part of our group of 4. It was me, Tim, Chris and Ray. All just names to you all, but amazing people to me. How could friends get any better? It's like we were actually living out that tv show. We were always together... always each other's biggest pain in the ass... and always each other's greatest hero. I miss that guy. And it bothers me, more that I have ever let on about the way Tim and I left things. We were having a spat... because we thought we had to be mad at each other for a little while. Who cares why, it just happened. And then he died. He died while we pretended things weren't ok. He died when we were being childish. He died before we did what guys can just do... give a little smirk, a clank of beer bottles and just realize that things are fine. It's the way guys say they love each other. A thing of beauty, really. And it haunts me that we lost out on that. Life is too short.
So, what a day of emotions. Just really puts things into perspective. Sometimes life isn't always going to make you smile. Sometimes it's going to get you with a sucker punch. But, no matter what, life can be summed up in three words: It goes on.
So, that's just one of the things. That was 2001. Now, lets move on to 2002. Tim. One of my really good friends. September 11th, 2002 he died in a car accident. The details were sketchy because he was the only car. But, details are irrelevant. Tim died. And I can still remember looking at him in the casket. I still remember walking into the funeral home the first time. I still remember the first person to greet me, I still remember that empty feeling. Tim was part of our group of 4. It was me, Tim, Chris and Ray. All just names to you all, but amazing people to me. How could friends get any better? It's like we were actually living out that tv show. We were always together... always each other's biggest pain in the ass... and always each other's greatest hero. I miss that guy. And it bothers me, more that I have ever let on about the way Tim and I left things. We were having a spat... because we thought we had to be mad at each other for a little while. Who cares why, it just happened. And then he died. He died while we pretended things weren't ok. He died when we were being childish. He died before we did what guys can just do... give a little smirk, a clank of beer bottles and just realize that things are fine. It's the way guys say they love each other. A thing of beauty, really. And it haunts me that we lost out on that. Life is too short.
So, what a day of emotions. Just really puts things into perspective. Sometimes life isn't always going to make you smile. Sometimes it's going to get you with a sucker punch. But, no matter what, life can be summed up in three words: It goes on.