Insert Something Clever and Witty Here
- I maybe possibly think that The Troop is the best show ever, and I want to see Jake/Akira porn like, stat. Or maybe not porn, but like, really steamy fic. That would validate my year. Also. Felix and his Japanese fangirls. LOVE.
- Rewatched Big Time Bad Boy, and shit, man, I never realized how Kendall/James centric that episode was. Like, eight different times Kendall looks to James for approval OVER LOGAN'S HEAD. It's ridiculous. And then when Kendall is watching James pretend to be bad, he has this huge, gigantic, we're-going-to-roleplay-this-later grin on his face, that widens when James sits down next to him. Like, it's threatening to split his face open, I do not even kid. Then when he tells Gustavo he can't fake things, him and James have this total eyefuck!moment where James is kind of giving him a knowing grin like maybe he's seen Kendall try to fake an orgasm or fakely explain away having an orgasm on top of the kitchen table when Mama Knight walked in at an inconvenient moment or something. And then they fist bump at the end for longer than any fist bump I've ever seen IN MY LIFE, only to do it again two seconds later. It's like, Kendall goes, hi, James. I'm going to stare at/touch you this entire episode. LOVE IT.
- Which makes it kind of ridiculous that I'm writing a Logan/James fic. I never meant for this to happen- it's just, I've been toying with the idea of Minnesota fic, and I've been toying with meta that I've never seen anyone else attempt to explain before, ever, and it will still have copious amounts of Kendall/James and Kendall/Logan, but it will end in Logan/James for sure, and the only things I've yet to figure out yet is what to call the damn thing and whether or not it's going to be the AU!Minnesota fic I've been thinking about (aka they never get discovered) or if it's just going to be some cute short story that will have nothing to do with AUs or my great/fabulous/awesome origins idea. I don't know if I want to waste such fabulosity on Logan/James, which is a pairing I'm mostly lukewarm about. Point being, we're either going to end up with a super wicked AU!Minnesota James/Kendall fic AND a separate James/Logan dealio, or just have them rolled into one story. TORNTORNTORN
- I'm finding the Sprouse twins ridculously cute lately, especially the one that plays Zack (is that Cole or Dylan? I'm too lazy to figure out which is which), and it's STRANGE. Firstly because I was just telling a friend last month that I feel really bad for the one that plays Zack because the one that plays Cody is obviously cuter and gets more girls, and secondly because he reminds me weirdly of my twenty year old nephew, which is just nine kinds of gross. Yet I'm still attracted to him. Zack, not my nephew. Um. Yeah. I'm gonna go with I have a thing for twins and call it a day.
- DEV PATEL DEV PATEL DEV PATEL. I watched the Last Airbender again with my mom and my cousin, because I'm obviously developing a sick obsession with another Patel. GODDAMN GUJJU BOYS ARE INVADING MY MIND, I CANNOT DATE ANOTHER ONE I CANNOT. at least not until I break up with the one I'm already with I think maybe someone should invent a drinking game to that movie, because this time I was a little less distracted by Dev's steamy hotness. Enough to notice that they not only say 'bending/bender/bend' way too many times, but that they also tend to repeat dialogue way too often. Like, how many times can you say the Southern Water Kingdom, really? Or when I ransacked the Great Library last year in my travels? Or is there a sacred place around here? There is a very sacred place. This city was built around this sacred place. Like, wtf? M. Night, I'm talking to you- great job, but get new script writers. Oh, and DEV PATEL DEV PATEL DEV PATEL. Is it wrong that for a split second I wondered how far down Aang's tattoos go and if Prince Zuko ever finds out when the kid finally turns of age?
- I do not understand why they just randomly aired two new episodes of The Forgotten. I still do not get why suddenly Alex and Candice are hoooking up when before it was all Alex/red haired chick and Candice/Tyler. I do not get why these pivotal episodes weren't aired before the season finale? Because that would have made more sense maybe possibly YES?
- Dora and I should never be allowed near small children, ever. At the beach we decided to play that game where you take two things and choose which you would rather do, except because we're gigantic perverts we decided 'do' meant 'bang' and thus began the epically long game of who-would-you-rather-fuck. Which included some rather catty comments about close friends and relatives, and these shining examples of our radiant inner beauty, most of which were spoken very near to young children:
D: Would you rather John Adams or Abraham Lincoln?
Me: John Adams. He was hot.
D: But Lincoln was tall, and had a big hat.
Me: What's that have to do with anything?
D: Tall guys have big cocks. And he obviously used that big hat as a condom!
Or:
D: Would you rather be gang banged by the Blood or the Crypts?
Me: -watches as a little boy swims away- Wow. Just wow.
Or:
Me: Would you rather Martin Luther King or-
D: Gandhi!
Me: Okay, or Gandhi?
D: Gandhi, because he probably knows all that tantric shit.
Me: He was celibate.
D: What?
Me: After he had kids, he became and forced his wife to be celibate.
D: I would have gotten a divorce.
Me: That wasn't really an option in 1930s India.
Or:
Me: Thomas Edison or George Washington.
D: George Washington. He was baller, man.
Or:
D: A zombie or a clown.
Me: That's mean! Ouch, okay, I'm gonna have to go with a zombie, because at least then the only thing they're going to do is try to bite you. With a clown, you never know when they're going to pull out a knife.
D: I choose a clown, because you can honk his nose.
Me: And that's why you're going to die.
D: Clowns are nice. They're supposed to make people happy!
Me: They all have knives, dude. They hide them, and they trick you into smiling, and then when you least expect it they KILL YOU.
D: You're so fucking weird.
Me: Fine, would you rather a zombie or a clown with a knife?
D: Yeah, I'll go with the zombie.
Me: Decomposing flesh, yum.