[TEXT] Double Toilet all the way across the Bathroom

[princemunculus]

TO: Thor Plumbing Inc.
FROM: Greed, Devil's Nest

SUBJECT: Bathroom fixtures

Alright, so look at this.

[Attached File]

This is the current state of the men's room in my establishment. I said I wanted two more toilets installed since we've been expanding. Well good job, there's two new toilets, but they're less than a foot apart from each other

Comments

action; I HAD TO

[obstinates]

[SITTING IN THERE POOPING]

[AND ON TOP OF THINGS]

Uhhhh, there's no toilet paper in here! Somebody out there...?

Re: action; I HAD TO

[cakefesta]

[oh I'm sorry, did you say something]

[because it's basically inaudible over the Indiana Jones theme playing in Gintoki's head as he kicks the door down, totally prepared to grab Naruto's shirt and launch him off of the toilet when--]

[TWO TOILETS?]

[WAIT, WHAT SHOULD HE DO?! The man etiquette of the bathroom clearly states -- wait, no every etiquette ever clearly states that any activity that involves seeing another man's wham-bam is WRONG!]

[he's about to close the door when-]

[oh dear sweet Amidabutsu, he never should have eaten any sort of food prepared by humanoid narwahls to start with--]

[this is it. this is your measure of manliness, Gintoki. sit up straight. no talk. no eye contact. no shame.]

[PANTS DOWN]

[ASS DOWN]

[PFFFFRRRRRRRBBBBBBBTTHHHHHHHHHB]

Re: action; I HAD TO

[obstinates]

[NARUTO'S LIFE FLASHES BEFORE HIS EYES AS THE DOOR IS KICKED OPEN. THIS IS IT. LIKE EVERY NIGHTMARE HE'S HAD FOR YEARS NOW, THE GIGANTIC BOWL OF RAMEN IS GETTING HIM AT HIS MOST VULNERABLE TIME]

[AND HE'S ABOUT TO GET EATEN]

[But, wait, it's Gintoki...]

OI! GIN-DUDE! OCCUPIED! GET THE HELL--

[But his protests are of no use. Gintoki's ass is glued to the toilet seat faster than instant ramen.]

[AND HOLY SHIT WHAT DID YOU EAT IT SOUNDED LIKE YOU SHAT AN EXPLOSIVE TAG.]

[The concussive force is so great, that it seems to stir Naruto's bowels as well.]

[PFFFFFFFFFBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBHHHHHHHHHHRRRRRRRRREEEEEEEEEEE]

Re: action; 8)))

[pattan]

GIN-SAN! I THINK THIS BATHROOM'S FOR PATRONS ONL--

Re: action;

[pattan]

... ... ...

Re: action; AND HERE WE GO

[pattan]

What the hell is going on in there?

Re: action; AND HERE WE GO

[obstinates]

IT'S A BATHROOM. WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK IS GOIN' ON!?!

[and then, rather unceremoniously and anti-climatically, a noise that can only be described as a high-pitched...]

[pooooooot]

Re: action; AND HERE WE GO

[cakefesta]

POOP IS GOING ON! NOTHING ELSE! THESE ARE THE TRIALS OF TRUE MEN, SHINPACHI, THIS WAS THE ONLY BATHROOM STALL AVAILABLE! AND CLOSE THE DOOR, WE DON'T HAVE MOSAICS IN OUR BUDGET THIS MONTH!

Re: action; AND HERE WE GO

[pattan]

[HE SLAMS THE DOOR AND BLOCKS IT FROM FURTHER ENTRY.]

ARE YOU TWO SERIOUSLY DOING THAT?! IS THIS A GAME SHOW OR SOMETHING?! WHAT KIND OF GAME SHOW WOULD EVEN FEATURE THIS!

WHAT ABOUT THE RULES!! EVERYONE KNOWS THE RULES! HOW CAN YOU JUST IGNORE THEM?!

Re: action; AND HERE WE GO

[cakefesta]

YOU BROKE THE RULES! YOU BROKE ALL THE RULES THE SECOND YOU CAME INTO THIS STALL! I DON'T NEED THE RULES, I'M THE MAIN CHARACTER!

Re: action; AND HERE WE GO

[pattan]

WHAT KIND OF LESSON ARE YOU SETTING THEN?! THE MAIN CHARACTER CAN'T IGNORE THE RULES!! ESPECIALLY THE BIGGEST ONE!

Re: action; AND HERE WE GO

[obstinates]

WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU TALKIN' ABOUT NOW?

AND WHY ARE YOU IN HERE? GET OUT! GET OUT GODDAMMIT! THREE'S A CROWD!

Re: action; AND HERE WE GO

[obstinates]

WHAT RULES ARE YOU TALKIN' ABOUT?

Re: action; AND HERE WE GO

[pattan]

HOW COULD YOU NOT KNOW THE RULES!! EVERY MAN KNOWS THE RULES! AREN'T YOU MAN?!

Re: action; AND HERE WE GO

[obstinates]

OF COURSE I'M A MAN! THE HELL ARE YOU TALKIN' ABOUT?

Re: action; AND HERE WE GO

[pattan]

THEN HOW DO YOU NOT KNOW THE RULES?!