016 || IT'S A NORMAL BODILY FUNCTION || VIDEO

[obstinates]

[When the video turns on, there is an alien in a labcoat staring at the camera.]

On to test number fifteen!

[The camera pans over to show Naruto floating in the middle of the room behind some sort of force-field.]

Oiiiiii! What's goin' on now? You're not gonna shoot me again, are ya?

[A small side-panel on the wall opens up and ejects a beeping device

Comments

video;

[gtfomyroom]

[don't laugh don't laugh don't laugh don't laugh]

[internally of course, laughing out loud makes you look like a baboon]

[just. sitting there grinning. and clapping. JOLLY GOOD SHOW OLD BEAN.]

Re: video;

[obstinates]

[At least the audio function is working a bit better now.]

[But you can probably tell what he's going to say by the look on his face.]

Goddammit, this isn't funny.

Re: video;

[gtfomyroom]

[Oh REALLY now. If Sasuke was in your position, wouldn't yo-... okay, that's a poor argument, Sasuke in your position wouldn't be funny at all.]

You're probably going to get plenty of people who will say otherwise, you know. But it at least looks more interesting than my job.

Re: video;

[obstinates]

[Sasuke can't fart. Sasuke is inhuman.]

I almost died, y'know! That's not funny.

... What's your job?

Re: video;

[gtfomyroom]

[Sasuke can't funny, period. Deadpan snarking just isn't the same.]

But you survived, so it's something you can look back on and laugh at. But moreover, would that really have killed you, as strong as you are?

... [Slight. Pinkness in the face, though her expression doesn't change one bit.] A voice actress for a "PG-rated" dating simulation game.

Re: video;

[obstinates]

... Even so, I don't wanna have a bomb go off next to me.

[Slight... eyebrow raise.]

I think Sakura-chan did somethin' like that once. So, wait, people are gonna date your voice? How does that work?

Re: video;

[gtfomyroom]

So it wouldn't? You really are impressive. But it wouldn't be pleasant, I'll grant you that.

[You get moved up the Possible Potential Replacement Meatshie--I mean Bodyguard rung a little-- I mean.]

Hm, something like that. It's one of those video game things, apparently; they take the lines I act out for them, put them in a game, and use my voice to make a given character in it seem a little more lifelike.

In truth, it's a little pathetic yet vaguely fascinating, if it wasn't for certain scenes.

Re: video;

[obstinates]

[He did regenerate a whole lung + a hole in his chest once in a matter of seconds.]

What sorta scenes do you mean?

Re: video;

[gtfomyroom]

[You know that and I know that. She doesn't. That works to your favor, Naruto; she's a very demanding boss. And has VERY high expectations after her last bodyguard.]

[Also: she's starting to get the impression you know only slightly less than she does on these matters. :|a]

... So calling it an "adult" game doesn't mean anything to you? Just asking; I'm still going to answer, if that doesn't clue you in.

Re: video;

[obstinates]

[Yeah, he sort of fails when it comes to these things even though on his birthday last October Elizabeth gave him a collection of hentai games.]

[He gave those to his perverted master because he didn't know how to work them.]

I guess it's sorta like those books ero-sennin writes then. The perverted ones.

[Not mentioning that he himself is a pervert. Never admit to that. Never.]

Re: video;

[gtfomyroom]

[... Wait which Elizabeth. Because I can only think of P3 Elizabeth.]

[Also, see that? That was a genuine sigh of relief. Hope you didn't blink or you'd miss it. Her face is still a little pink, though.]

Ah, good. That makes things a little easier for me... Yes, more or less. I'm fine with everything else even if it can get extremely cliché sometimes, but the scenes wherein there is... well, sexual intercourse, make me want to start throwing offensive spells at my bosses.

Re: video;

[obstinates]

[Elizabeth as in Gintama Elizabeth. The giant penguin looking creature that's really a man in a sheet.]

[Awww, cute blush.]

...

So, wait, how do you... y'know... have sex with your voice?

Re: video;

[gtfomyroom]

[...... fkffkfjnj oh god. that's even better.]

[She... puts a hand to her forehead, and wears the most tsun expression of "fuck this shit" imaginable. You know the one; with the eyes closed and the other hand on the hip. This is going to be fun.]

They... put a picture of the character I'm acting for up on the display. With the male part of the equation... doing what males do at that point.

They have several such pictures, each one of different... positions, with... text telling the player what is happening story-wise.

[And, said slightly quickly yet still fairly understandable,]

My voice comes into play in the sense that I have to make the sounds the female would make at such a time.

Re: video;

[obstinates]

[Yes, his experience with video games is limited. Shinpachi has been making him watch movies and DVDs though, and that's kind of like it. He's been watching a lot of Schwarzenegger movies though, sooooo...]

[And even Naruto's whiskered cheeks redden slightly at that, but he's snickering.]

You gotta make the sounds?

Re: video;

[gtfomyroom]

[Fucking vidja gaemz, how do they werk.]

[... She kind of deserves that, given how she's laughed at him twice now. Doesn't mean she's happy about it, but...]

I didn't stutter. And if you want to make it worse, bear in mind this didn't come about from a guide malfunction; I mistakenly signed up for this without a full understanding of what it involved.

[There's a slight huff, as she folds her arms and sits down on the nearest thing. Probably her bed, knowing her. Laughter in 3, 2, 1...]

Re: video;

[obstinates]

[Bawww, Naruto sort of snickers once more but he shrugs.]

Oi, me too. I didn't think they'd throw grenades at me.

And this isn't the first job I've messed up on either, y'know? One job I worked at a restaurant and the uniform was sorta weird.

[IE: he was only allowed to wear a banana hammock the whole time while serving food]