025 || (DREAM) VIDEO || some people should not be introduced to Earth culture

[haruno]

[ Sakura stands on this platform, dressed in coveralls. Blue coveralls, with a red long sleeved shirt on. She adjusts her white gloves, then pulls down her baseball cap emblazoned with a giant "S." ]

Time to save the princess.

[ And armed with a plunger, off she goes. ]

Comments

[ACTION]

[pattan]

[Guess who's sitting outside of a large, 8-bit castle.]

[Not only that, he's wearing baggy pants, a blue, open vest that showcases his bare chest.]

[And a giant...and I mean giant white and red spotted hat.]

Sorry, your princess is in another castle.

[haruno]

[ Sakura had to fight to get here and now she hears this?

Sakura rests her plunger of awesome on her shoulder and scowls. ]

You know, that's still the stupidest thing I've ever heard. What, is someone else's princess in this castle? Can't I rescue them all?

[ She fully expects Shinpachi to answer this. ]

[pattan]

What, is this Link to the Past? There aren't seven maidens to rescue to seal the Dark World, you know.

Incidentally, this castle is a timeshare. D*nkey Kong lives here.

[Why yes, that was a barrel flying overhead.]

[haruno]

No, this is Constantinople.

[ Points to the sign. ]

And I'm not a link, I'm --

[ That barrel smacks into a Bob bomb or whatever and EXPLODES IN MASSIVE FIREWORKS! DUCK AND COVER! ]

[video? action? what is this even?]

[pilot_zero_two]

[from the highest window of the tallest tower, a long brown plait can be seen fluttering gently in the breeze...]

[The princess is waiting, Sakura.]

Re: [video? action? what is this even?]

[pattan]

[Have some Toadpachi]

E-EH?! I JUST SAID YOU WERE IN ANOTHER CASTLE!!

Re: [video? action? what is this even?]

[pilot_zero_two]

[a head pokes out the window...adorned with a small gold crown.]

Yeah? So? I fail to see how that's my problem!

Re: [video? action? what is this even?]

[pattan]

YOU JUST MADE MY ENTIRE ROLE A LIE!! TOADS HAVE SCRUPLES, YOU KNOW!! THE MUSHROOM KINGDOM UNIONIZED GUILD OF TOADS IS GOING TO HEAR ABOUT THIS!!

[... what they said]

[brbavenging]

[because there is a ridiculous amount of fanart of this

PRINCESS TOADSUKE IS HELPING SAKURIO ON HIS QUEST TO FIND ALL THE PRINCESSES OF THE MUSHROOM KINGDOM... OR SOMETHING. Kicks over a goomba.]

You suck at this.

Re: [... what they said]

[pattan]

[Okay, Toadpachi is just staring.]

[Wow.]

[Really.]

[Suddenly your decision to go live with Orochimaru makes a little more sense.]

I call for a vote of no confidence in the Princess of the Mushroom Kingdom.

I'm defecting to the Koopa army.

[... what they said]

[brbavenging]

[disclaimer: Toadsuke is from a comic so I'm having fun and don't judge me, guys]

[scoffs]

Whatever, loser. You fit in with all those freaks.

[LOOKS AT HIS NAILS]

Re: [... what they said]

[pattan]

[I'm so sorry.]

MY MOTHER ALWAYS TOLD ME I'D BE A BETTER GOOMBA!! SCREW YOU GUYS!!

[chuugoku_monban]

-She has fiery red hair and a green/white motif. You can see where this is going.

Oh and she's on a bridge. Over lava.-

[haruno]

[ Sakura take a stance at the far side of the bridge!!! ]

You! Fiendish one!

... I challenge you!

To a dance off for all the princesses in the all the castles! I don't care if they're mine or not, and stop having time shares! It makes things unnecessarily complicated!

... Is that lava?

[chuugoku_monban]

But what's the point in having a castle without a princess? You're busting my balls here, plumber.

[haruno]

[ She's on the bridge looking down at the lava ]

You'r a king. Get married or something, make your own princesses!

Oh, speaking of busting balls...

[ she reaches into her coverals pocket and pulls out... AN INVOICE! ]

You owe me 4438 Gold Coins for the plumbing job at your first abandoned castle.

[plznospoilers]

[ What is that... floating head over there?! Coming towards you menacingly?! ]

[haruno]

[ Like she knows but she'll JUMP RIGHT INTO IT WITH HER PLUNGER!!! ]

[plznospoilers]

[ YAAAA TURNS AWAY SFNEKJA DON'T LOOK AT MY FACE NOOOOOO--

/DISAPPEARS..... ]

[haruno]

[ Blinks.

OH WELL! ONWARD! ]