In Wait
There's a certain amount of satisfaction that comes from knowing you've done everything you can. You've played your hand, taken your turn, and the fallout that ensues is entirely up to another living, breathing entity. How that individual values the craft of your mouth, heart, or hands is contingent on many factors. I'd wager that half of that decision, lest you be of particular interest to that individual, is based upon that hand. The other half depends upon that person's own worldview, struggles, strengths, and spin upon what you've presented. The time has yet to arrive for me to stand on that stage and present my play, but I don't want to continue to lurk on the matter. It's virtually closed. I've all but washed my hands of it. Now, there's only waiting.
Waiting.
Sometimes it feels like waiting is the bane to my existence.
Part of gaining back some sense of control is getting my training, fitness, and body healthy again. Despite running personal best times in 50 miles, 100k and 100 miles this fall, I'm incredibly out of shape and perpetually tired. My training was terrible, and I never slept enough. My weight was the highest it's been since having children, and I really didn't feel very good about myself. Most people don't consider the winter holiday season the best time to curb bad eating habits, but I don't have much of a choice. It's necessary. It's required changing the way I eat and the way I think about what I'm eating. Thus far, it all seems to be going well.
But, there's a great deal of waiting involved in this matter as well.
And that phantom prince charming I've long mentioned? I've been waiting for him forever.
That may be the hand that's never played.
Or, maybe it'll lay itself out on the table before me, and I'll only have to scoop up the pieces and smile.
Doubtful.
But, it makes the waiting all the more bearable.
Waiting.
Sometimes it feels like waiting is the bane to my existence.
Part of gaining back some sense of control is getting my training, fitness, and body healthy again. Despite running personal best times in 50 miles, 100k and 100 miles this fall, I'm incredibly out of shape and perpetually tired. My training was terrible, and I never slept enough. My weight was the highest it's been since having children, and I really didn't feel very good about myself. Most people don't consider the winter holiday season the best time to curb bad eating habits, but I don't have much of a choice. It's necessary. It's required changing the way I eat and the way I think about what I'm eating. Thus far, it all seems to be going well.
But, there's a great deal of waiting involved in this matter as well.
And that phantom prince charming I've long mentioned? I've been waiting for him forever.
That may be the hand that's never played.
Or, maybe it'll lay itself out on the table before me, and I'll only have to scoop up the pieces and smile.
Doubtful.
But, it makes the waiting all the more bearable.