I swear he does it on purpose. I'm just not sure he knows.

[gapunzel]

Office Fairy Godmother:  Here Boss, want some cantaloupe?
Boss:  No, thank you, I don't care for it.
Office Fairy Godmother:  Ok, well i'll give it to Gabe. I know SHE likes cantaloupe.
Me:  Sure, I'll take his piece!  *NOM*
Office Fairy Godmother:  You don't like cantaloupe?
Boss:  Melons, really. Cantaloupe, honeydew, all of the melons. Never been a fan.
Me:  ...
Boss:  I guess you could say I'm melon-averse.
Me:  I'm working real hard to maintain a straight face here.
Boss:  Why? Why would you try to keep a straight face?
Me:  *firmly changes subject to statistics*
*minutes pass*
Me:  Peanuts?
Boss:  Sure, I'll have some nuts.  Nut me.
Me:  *losing the battle* He spurns the melons, but he goes for the nuts.
Boss:  Please, there's no comparison!
Me:  I just wouldn't have pegged you as a nut man, is all.
Boss:  But nuts have oils and salts and proteins!
Me:  This is why I should keep a straight face.
Boss:  Surely you know we evolved to eat fruit only when we are starving.
Me:  If we are still talking about actual fruit, sure.
Boss:  Melons are a fruit, yes.
Me:  Melons are a euphemism.
Boss:  *extended splutters*