.:She Was Right:.
"My momma used to tell me these crazy things
She used to tell me my daddy was an evil man
She used to tell me he hated me
But then I got a little bit older and I realized
She was the crazy one
And there was nothing I could do or say to try to change it cuz that's just the way she was."
I don't know how long this bag of Fruit Loops is going to last me.
I'm stuck. Longing.
My mentality is changing. The way that I view life changes a little more everyday. The things that I once saw as horrible, unimaginable, are starting to not look as bad as they once did. My very own friends have began to pick up addictions, habits, that I never thought would become.
What do I long for?
I long for a boyfriend, a companion. I'm getting sick of this single shit. It's only been a few months and it's getting old fast, especially the way I've been living it.
I long for the ability to support myself. To be able to stand on my own two feet and to be able to pay for more than just gas every week. I long for a little extra spending.
I long for my own bed to sleep in.
This life, this community, isn't everything that it's cracked up to be. At one point in time I believed that I was actually in a perfect (or at least as close as it gets to perfect) environment. Things like drugs and death, murders, crime, poverty......it's all here. Not just in slums, third world countries, and East LA.
I used to have dreams. I'd like to find them.
Maybe that's why I've been smoking so much weed.
How many bullets would I love to put in my head for every time a person tells me how great a mother is to someone. Not every mother is this wonderful woman; beautiful, intelligent, everything.
Three words on that:
Fuck That Shit.
My mother was right about one thing though:
The real world is one ugly place to live in.
Until someone convinces me otherwise.
She used to tell me my daddy was an evil man
She used to tell me he hated me
But then I got a little bit older and I realized
She was the crazy one
And there was nothing I could do or say to try to change it cuz that's just the way she was."
I don't know how long this bag of Fruit Loops is going to last me.
I'm stuck. Longing.
My mentality is changing. The way that I view life changes a little more everyday. The things that I once saw as horrible, unimaginable, are starting to not look as bad as they once did. My very own friends have began to pick up addictions, habits, that I never thought would become.
What do I long for?
I long for a boyfriend, a companion. I'm getting sick of this single shit. It's only been a few months and it's getting old fast, especially the way I've been living it.
I long for the ability to support myself. To be able to stand on my own two feet and to be able to pay for more than just gas every week. I long for a little extra spending.
I long for my own bed to sleep in.
This life, this community, isn't everything that it's cracked up to be. At one point in time I believed that I was actually in a perfect (or at least as close as it gets to perfect) environment. Things like drugs and death, murders, crime, poverty......it's all here. Not just in slums, third world countries, and East LA.
I used to have dreams. I'd like to find them.
Maybe that's why I've been smoking so much weed.
How many bullets would I love to put in my head for every time a person tells me how great a mother is to someone. Not every mother is this wonderful woman; beautiful, intelligent, everything.
Three words on that:
Fuck That Shit.
My mother was right about one thing though:
The real world is one ugly place to live in.
Until someone convinces me otherwise.