Don't be Hatin...or...DAMN IT USE SPELL CHEKC!!
Ok...So I hate my mom.
I know this is a common statement heard on LJ after all there are millions of people whining about their mom becaus ethey won't let them go out or they are abusive bitches. I realized why I hated my mom.
She never raised me right.
She left me in the hands of my grandmother, a person designed to spoil their grandchildren, and my mother just left me there. Get spoiled. Waste under her while life flew past me. The few times i did spend with my mom she was either emotionally absent or emotionally abusive so when I started to live my life I didn't know what to do.
In the end I was never taught how to keep good credit. how to keep a job. How not to expect shit handed to me on a silve platter. I learned hard and my life hurt plenty due to these vital lessons that failed to be taught to me.
I know alot of people are like...bastard! He was spoiled while I was beat! AND HE'S COMPLAINING ABOUT IT!!
Well to be honest for those people who think i wasn't abused I had an uncle who like to hit me frequently and my mom, when she was around, loved the belt. But those points made me stronger while the time spent with my grandmother made me weaker. I look back on my childhood and remember very little except for the pain and the pain that I remember still carries me through life. Is this weird? Is this odd? Should i be happy about my abused childhood and be angry about my spoiled childhood? I dunno.
I had some good news today and then looked back at how i had to work my ass off over the last 3 years to get this good news. I then remembered all the times when i was hit or mentally attacked by my mother or her many boyfriends/husbands and think how hard I worked to not get hit and not get abused. Then I remember the times my grandmother just got me anything i wanted or needed and how I just laid on my bed oplaying video games getting fat (Granted thats still a habit today).
I can't blame my grandmother. She saw how my mother turned out and she wanted someone less of a bitch/ass. So when she had the chance to raise me she handled me with kid gloves which stuck me a world a very few friends and a rich fantasy life. But she had her best intentions. However when it comes to my mom she was a BITCH but she was a bitch who challanged me and the few parts of the shitting life I had as a child (Suicide attempts and so forth) made me a stronger person today who is willing to face the world with a middle finger with one hand and a fist as the other.
So mom...FUCK YOU and thank you though i will never say so to your face. You absolute abuse towards me when I was kid made me a better person. Stronger. Believe it or not happier. And as I look at your life and the shit that you have dragged yourself through makes me believe KARMA is still alive and well in this world.
End transmission....
I know this is a common statement heard on LJ after all there are millions of people whining about their mom becaus ethey won't let them go out or they are abusive bitches. I realized why I hated my mom.
She never raised me right.
She left me in the hands of my grandmother, a person designed to spoil their grandchildren, and my mother just left me there. Get spoiled. Waste under her while life flew past me. The few times i did spend with my mom she was either emotionally absent or emotionally abusive so when I started to live my life I didn't know what to do.
In the end I was never taught how to keep good credit. how to keep a job. How not to expect shit handed to me on a silve platter. I learned hard and my life hurt plenty due to these vital lessons that failed to be taught to me.
I know alot of people are like...bastard! He was spoiled while I was beat! AND HE'S COMPLAINING ABOUT IT!!
Well to be honest for those people who think i wasn't abused I had an uncle who like to hit me frequently and my mom, when she was around, loved the belt. But those points made me stronger while the time spent with my grandmother made me weaker. I look back on my childhood and remember very little except for the pain and the pain that I remember still carries me through life. Is this weird? Is this odd? Should i be happy about my abused childhood and be angry about my spoiled childhood? I dunno.
I had some good news today and then looked back at how i had to work my ass off over the last 3 years to get this good news. I then remembered all the times when i was hit or mentally attacked by my mother or her many boyfriends/husbands and think how hard I worked to not get hit and not get abused. Then I remember the times my grandmother just got me anything i wanted or needed and how I just laid on my bed oplaying video games getting fat (Granted thats still a habit today).
I can't blame my grandmother. She saw how my mother turned out and she wanted someone less of a bitch/ass. So when she had the chance to raise me she handled me with kid gloves which stuck me a world a very few friends and a rich fantasy life. But she had her best intentions. However when it comes to my mom she was a BITCH but she was a bitch who challanged me and the few parts of the shitting life I had as a child (Suicide attempts and so forth) made me a stronger person today who is willing to face the world with a middle finger with one hand and a fist as the other.
So mom...FUCK YOU and thank you though i will never say so to your face. You absolute abuse towards me when I was kid made me a better person. Stronger. Believe it or not happier. And as I look at your life and the shit that you have dragged yourself through makes me believe KARMA is still alive and well in this world.
End transmission....