The Scent of a Man
Until recently, I'd never been with anyone who smelled good to me. I'd read fanfiction where people went on about how good someone else smelled and I've seen a bit here and there in television and movies about how the scent of a woman affected a man. But the people I'd been with ... they smelled like people. Nothing special. Often distasteful. Their scent was something I put up with for the other aspects of being with them (or it was something I put up with along with the other aspects) - in either case, the smell wasn't something I liked. I'd have been happier with none at all. I assumed the stuff I'd read and seen on TV was literary license, exaggeration, etc.
Then I met the guy I'm with right now. Well, 'got close to him' is more accurate, as I've known him for years as a distant friend. I noticed how he smelled right away. He was smoking at the time (well, not right that second, but rather, he was a smoker) and I assumed part of my intense attraction to his smell had to be a subconscious similarity between his odor and that of my gentleman caller, the no-strings-attached guy I had sex with a half dozen times or so a couple years ago. Those were good associations, so I assumed the positive regard I had for the smell was bleed-over positivity.
He quit smoking. Then he quit chewing nicotine gum. I noticed the change in aroma. Instead of diminishing how much I like the smell, it's only increased it, which disproves the 'positive association with previous smoker' theory. I even entertained the thought that maybe he was wearing some perfume or cologne, but 1) it's a very human fragrance and I've never had anything even remotely similar in all the artificial crap I've inhaled, and 2) I've had a snootful of him after showers, just waking up, getting off work, after a three hour nature walk/outing, post-coitus, etc.
The way he smells to me is so fucking delicious that it drives me nuts! I want to go around with my nose plastered to his skin 24/7. I swap pillows with him after he leaves. I rub my face on his side of the bed like I'm a bad dog wallowing on a dead bird they found in the yard. I'd like to rise above this embarrassing crap, but it seems easier to just do it in the privacy of my bedroom and then move on, so that my hindbrain is happy with his scent lingering anew on my skin and quits bugging me about the absence of it.
I've never had this remarkable reaction to the scent of anyone else. Makes me think that the fanfiction purple prose about smell is more right on than I'd thought. It certainly gives me confidence in including it occasionally in my own writing, because I know it's at least occasionally true. I wonder if I'd like the smell as much if I wasn't in love with him? I also wonder if I'm in love with him because he smells like that?
Until I figure that out, there's a pillow I need to go rub all over my face.
Then I met the guy I'm with right now. Well, 'got close to him' is more accurate, as I've known him for years as a distant friend. I noticed how he smelled right away. He was smoking at the time (well, not right that second, but rather, he was a smoker) and I assumed part of my intense attraction to his smell had to be a subconscious similarity between his odor and that of my gentleman caller, the no-strings-attached guy I had sex with a half dozen times or so a couple years ago. Those were good associations, so I assumed the positive regard I had for the smell was bleed-over positivity.
He quit smoking. Then he quit chewing nicotine gum. I noticed the change in aroma. Instead of diminishing how much I like the smell, it's only increased it, which disproves the 'positive association with previous smoker' theory. I even entertained the thought that maybe he was wearing some perfume or cologne, but 1) it's a very human fragrance and I've never had anything even remotely similar in all the artificial crap I've inhaled, and 2) I've had a snootful of him after showers, just waking up, getting off work, after a three hour nature walk/outing, post-coitus, etc.
The way he smells to me is so fucking delicious that it drives me nuts! I want to go around with my nose plastered to his skin 24/7. I swap pillows with him after he leaves. I rub my face on his side of the bed like I'm a bad dog wallowing on a dead bird they found in the yard. I'd like to rise above this embarrassing crap, but it seems easier to just do it in the privacy of my bedroom and then move on, so that my hindbrain is happy with his scent lingering anew on my skin and quits bugging me about the absence of it.
I've never had this remarkable reaction to the scent of anyone else. Makes me think that the fanfiction purple prose about smell is more right on than I'd thought. It certainly gives me confidence in including it occasionally in my own writing, because I know it's at least occasionally true. I wonder if I'd like the smell as much if I wasn't in love with him? I also wonder if I'm in love with him because he smells like that?
Until I figure that out, there's a pillow I need to go rub all over my face.