Bricks in the Wall, Chapter 4: Paint the Town Red & Second Base Coat

[game_byrd]

Title: Paint the Town Red
Characters: Sylar/Peter
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: None
Word count: ~2,000
Setting: The Wall
Summary: Peter and Sylar are relaxing after a fun project when Peter does something unexpected
Notes: Sylar's POV

Comments

[dancingdragon3]

That was some fabulous suspense! In the first part, I mean. I was on the edge of my seat to see what Peter was gonna do. Very nice. I was completely wrapped up in Sylar's pov and so thrilled that he got a kiss! How do you make such a little thing into something so big?

I was surprised at Peter's pov. It's funny how wrong Sylar is about Peter, like how he hasn't been tempted by any of Sylar's invitations so far and that he knows Sylar's plaintive expression is fake. LOL. Sylar has a lot to learn about what Peter likes. Very realistic. And Peter's flub about second base was adorable.

[game_byrd]

Yay! Thanks! I put a magnifying lens over the character's feelings/perception of what's going on/bodily reactions, and then crank up the emotion.

I love the little POV switches. They're fun exercises! I write one POV in full first, then come back and write the other, building around the framework of dialogue and actions described in the first. It's much more interesting when the characters have misunderstandings about one another's motives.

In this piece, a couple of the things I was toying with was how Peter senses someone else's moods, and for Sylar, how he chooses his expressions to cause certain effects.

Thanks so much for reading and commenting!

[means2bhuman]

I love your few added sentences in there - they were great

[game_byrd]

Yay! Thanks!

Consider yourself bugged. I'd actually decided I was going to incorporate that into SS, just set it maybe a month or two from now. Gabriel's been giving a lot of thought as to how to manage the Hunger. Working on Eli would be one of his early experiments.

I feel bad that I'm not as inspired by SS as I used to be. D:

The way I'm writing Peter right now in MBU is very perceptive, especially about feelings, but that's about it. It's how I think he was after Arthur drained him. I'm sure you've noticed that sometimes that empathy is straining to get out, just itching and tingling and burning to make an appearance and generally Peter ignores it. I'm sure he will be tempted eventually!

I think I'll go post some MBU on FFN. I don't think I have Upper or Lower Body up there. And then I'll loop back and put up another Brick. You've seen most of them, maybe all of them. Not sure. I lose track of who I show my fic to.

[x_x_igorina_x_x]

Wonderful tension in this one. Sylar trying not to scare Peter off and Peter trying not to be scared off.

I'm really enjoying the switched povs. It's fun seeing how both characters are viewing certain events.

"So, do you want to do that second base now?" Sylar froze completely, eyes fixed on Peter, who mentally reviewed what he'd said. "Coat! Coat! I meant that second coat of paint! Jeez!"

I keep picturing Peter face-palming after this.

[game_byrd]

Yes, Peter would be really blushing after that and hiding his face. :D