Things Unsaid

[game_byrd]

Title: Things Unsaid
Characters: Peter Petrelli/Sylar
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: Mild violence
Word count: ~2,800
Setting: The Wall. This is a companion piece to means2bhuman’s Last Man On Earth and happens immediately after it.
Summary: Peter reacts to Sylar’s tender kiss and the realization of Sylar’s true feelings that comes with it.

Comments

[game_byrd]

I really enjoy the way you show...Peter thinking, the mechanics of his mind. Peter will literally get hung up about something and you write his mind as suddenly just grinding to a halt and him becoming almost paralyzed, sitting there sputtering, trying to oil the gears and get a thought going. We see that a lot in canon and its something I really appreciate about what you write.

Doesn't he just get hung up on things sometimes? I loved your 'recalculating' joke! I've been working hard since August on Peter's thought process(es), when you really got onto me in Wall Verse Shorts to shed some light on that. It's very different from Sylar's. My idea of Sylar's thought processes is fairly close to what you have - he has a strong internal monologue and nearly everything he 'thinks' is said out loud in his mind. Even his emotions are given verbally to some extent, as he'll find mental words to express how he feels.

Peter doesn't 'think' about how he feels. He just feels it. So there's nothing there for me to put in first person thoughts, unless I'm doing it sideways by alluding to it in the manner of how Peter thinks of something else. Mostly I have to rely on narrative exposition to get across what he's feeling, by saying it directly or by describing his physical response and body language.

So I've been working on how to better illustrate what goes through his head.

"Sylar’s face pinched in worry and he slowly retreated backwards on the couch until he was at the other end." -- Loved this add. It gives scope and its a great picture as well. Such a little add, right? But I really like it!

Good! The adders for setting were pretty minor, but they really did make the piece pop a bit. And gave a lot of background to hook it up with yours. Sylar is withdrawing across 'Switzerland' there!