[infinite] the chain
the chain
infinite, sunggyu, woohyun (always-a-girl)
pg, 1896w
woohee discovers sungkyung is dating the dance instructor. (001. student/teacher)
ao3 mirror
Sungkyung is dating the dance instructor. Woohee finds this out accidentally when she’s coming out of the bathroom before practice and she hears Sungkyung’s voice coming down the hall, followed by a low male voice. Woohee freezes when she recognizes it as Dongmin’s. She peers around the corner and sees two people standing by the wall facing each other, one of them in the grey hoodie Sungkyung always wears to practice. Woohee can’t tell if they’re kissing or talking, but they’re standing very close and talking very quietly, except for Sungkyung’s occasional giggle.
It’s common knowledge that Sungkyung has a boyfriend - she’s always fiddling with the silver chain bracelet she wears on one wrist, clearly a present - but nobody has been able to find out who it is. Woohee had pictured some wild-looking rock guitarist in a leather jacket, a tall guy with big hands and smoky eyeliner awkwardly peering into a jewelry display case. Certainly not someone like Dongmin, with his ball caps and American hip-hop warmup music and kind-uncle smile.
Woohee waits until she hears their footsteps down the hall and the door to the practice room close before she moves again. When she enters the practice room, Sungkyung tilts her head at her. “You’re late,” she says. The other eight girls are already warming up, even Sungyeon.
“I wore the wrong shoes,” Woohee replies. Dongmin is at the front of the room talking to Hoyeon. When Woohee looks away from him she notices Sungkyung staring at her, but Sungkyung blinks and turns to stretch before Woohee can do anything else.
After their three hours of practice, Woohee waits for Minhye and Hoyeon so they can walk back to the dorm together as usual. The night air feels good on her bare legs. “I think Dongmin oppa is dating someone,” she says.
Hoyeon raises an eyebrow. “What makes you say that?”
“Just a hunch. Why, does that surprise you?”
“Kind of, I guess. So who do you think it is?”
“Oh...” Woohee shrugs. She feels good, like she’s keeping something warm inside her. “A hairstylist? I was just guessing.”
“Boring. Who cares,” says Minhye. “I really want ice cream.”
“We’re on a diet,” says Woohee.
“I know,” she says. “That’s the first thing I’m gonna do when we debut.”
“Get ice cream?” says Hoyeon. “You should be more ambitious.”
Minhye kicks at a rock and it scuttles down the sidewalk. “Everybody’s too ambitious,” she says.
Woohee tries to forget about it, but when she can’t sleep that night she starts thinking about Sungkyung and Dongmin. She wonders how many times they’ve kissed in the hallways before or after practice, Sungkyung standing on her tiptoes a bit, his thin mustache against her lips, her hair covering both their faces. Or maybe they don’t kiss; maybe Sungkyung just makes him hold hands and buy her jewelry. She could be that type, too.
Woohee tries to forget about it, but now she thinks about it all the time: whenever Sungkyung leaves to go for a run alone, when she locks herself in the bathroom to use the phone, when she fiddles with her bracelet while she’s waiting for something. Woohee watches her during dance practice more often than she watches herself in the mirror, counting how many lingering glances she gives Dongmin. She sees the difference between the way Dongmin moves Myungsoon’s arms to demonstrate a piece of choreography to her and the way he touches Sungkyung very carefully and quickly. The first time he touches Woohee’s shoulder to correct the angle Woohee flinches so hard that Dongjoo starts laughing. “Something wrong?” says Dongmin, laughing too. “I’m not going to hurt you.”
Woohee glances over at Sungkyung, but she’s looking at the mirror, marking the footwork. “Nothing,” she says. She rolls her shoulders forward. “Show me again?”
That’s the last dance practice they have as ten. Every time, Woohee expects the trainee elimination to take place like on a television show, with Lee Jungyeop reading out the list of who’s made it and who has to pack their bags and go home before the closing credits roll. Instead, it’s a quiet process: the eliminated candidates are taken aside and told the company’s decided to keep them in reserve for a future project (“the ‘we’re-sorry-you-suck’ talk”, Sungyeon calls it), and meanwhile the ones that are chosen to stay have a meeting together and are told they’re that much closer to debut. The more of these meetings Woohee goes to, the more she starts to feel the conspiratorial nature of it.
At the latest meeting, they’re down to seven. Sungkyung fiddles with her bracelet all through Jungyeop’s speech. Jungsook, Jiae, and Minhye are gone.
Woohee decides to bring it up at dinner that evening, when they’re talking about some male trainees that might be joining the company.
“I think someone like Dongmin oppa would be nice to date,” she says lightly. Sungkyung chokes on her soup, but it’s covered by Dongjoo’s laughter.
“Yah. You got a crush on him or something?” says Hoyeon. “This is the second time she’s brought him up this week,” she tells the others.
“He’s handsome, isn’t he? And talented.” Woohee shrugs and grins at Myungsoon, who’s sitting next to Sungkyung. “What’s not to like?”
“You have to be desperate,” groans Sungyeon. “The guy trainees are much better-looking. You don’t need to settle for a grandpa.”
Sungkyung shifts on the bench, looking down at her food. “That’s not very charitable,” says Woohee. She glances at Sungkyung. Sungkyung meets her eyes once, then stands up and leaves the table.
After dinner, Woohee and Sungkyung have vocal practice together. Sungkyung doesn’t say a word to Woohee the entire time, except to correct her when she sings a wrong line, her face and voice totally neutral. After practice Woohee expects the silent treatment to continue, but instead Sungkyung packs her things together and waits for her at the door. It’s a fifteen-minute walk back to the dorms from the studio. Woohee tries to think of something, anything that could put her on a different route, but the more she delays the more blank her mind becomes.
They’re barely out the front door before Sungkyung says, “What the fuck was that at dinner?”
Woohee feels so nervous that she has to talk. “What, dinner? I didn’t mean to finish all the yellow radish, next time tell me if you want--”
“Are you an idiot?” snaps Sungkyung. “Because you’re not an actress.”
In a way, Woohee’s relieved that she doesn’t have to play nice, though now there’s a different kind of pressure on her words. “You know, I wish I’d thought of it,” she says carefully. “It’s very smart of you.”
“Don’t you dare,” says Sungkyung. “Don’t say it.”
“It’s too bad Minhye couldn’t think of it first.”
“That’s it.” Sungkyung grabs Woohee’s wrist and pulls, and an electric current runs up and down Woohee’s body, thrill and fear crashing and overlapping until they wipe each other out and she feels nothing at all. Sungkyung pulls her into an alley off the main street and throws Woohee’s wrist down when she lets go. Woohee almost falls to the ground. “What the fuck is wrong with you? You’re jealous, is that it? You have a crush on him.”
Woohee laughs, but it’s full of air. “God, don’t be stupid. You’ll really take Hoyeon’s word over mine? Anyway, I’m glad you figured it out, because it’s obviously working out for you.”
“Do you really-- Do you really think that’s what it’s about?”
“Oh, come on. You can’t tell me you really like him.”
“Well, you would know, wouldn’t you?” Sungkyung’s voice is blustery, like she can’t get her words in order. “A model. We all know what that really means.”
“I auditioned,” says Woohee, her voice rising. “I didn’t just fucking bat my eyelashes and say, ‘Oh, sajangnim, I really love Nell, let me be a singer.’ Did you get a bracelet from him, too?"
Sungkyung sputters. “You...”
Woohee stares back at Sungkyung, chin lifted, waiting. Sungkyung’s hands are balled into fists.
“Fuck you,” she shouts at last. She turns and starts walking back towards the street.
Woohee can’t help it. “That’s the best you can do?”
Sungkyung spins on her heel. “I hope you...”
Woohee braces herself. She wants more of this, more of Sungkyung’s TV drama threats that scratch weakly at her skin and fall away, leaving her unharmed.
“I hope you debut,” Sungkyung says, and Woohee looks up, startled. “I really do.” Then she disappears around the corner.
Woohee doesn’t go home that night. She walks to Hongdae and sits in an all-night cafe, drinking iced green tea lattes and watching music videos play without sound on the wall. Her phone rings in her hands and she starts a bit. It’s Dongjoo.
“Where are you?” says Dongjoo as soon as she picks up. “Are you with unnie?”
“I’ll be back,” says Woohee, pushing the green tea slush around with her straw. She wonders if Minhye ever got her ice cream. “Wait. Isn’t Sungkyung with you?”
“No. I called her and she said she’d be home in the morning. Jungryul oppa’s going to hang her when she gets back. Both of you, I think.”
Woohee puts her straw in her mouth. It’s cold and most of the flavour has gone. “Why do you think that makes me want to come home?”
“Just come back, okay,” says Dongjoo, her voice strained, before she hangs up.
Woohee walks quietly when she comes in, fearing the worst, but no one else is awake, even when she goes into the bedroom and lies down in the vacant spot beside Sungji. Sungkyung’s spot is empty.
At dance practice the next day, Sungkyung is ten minutes late and stony-faced. Woohee is too afraid to look at her until Dongjoo says, “Where’d your bracelet go?”
Woohee turns her head sharply, surprised. Sungkyung is sitting on the floor tying her shoes. The sleeves of her hoodie are pushed up, and her wrists are bare. “I gave it back,” she says. She glances up at Woohee and Woohee looks away, her face heating. “Idols can’t date.”
“Aw, we’re not idols yet,” says Dongjoo. “You could’ve kept going.”
Sungkyung’s still looking at Woohee. “I’m going to be one,” she says, “and I’m going to do it my own way.”
She’s waiting for an answer. Woohee inhales, going into a side bend. The door opens and Dongmin walks in, and the others turn and greet him, their sneakers squeaking on the floor.
“You must not have really liked him, after all,” says Woohee quietly. Sungkyung gets up and goes to get her water bottle from the corner of the room. Woohee allows herself a shiver of victory before she turns and greets Dongmin and practice begins.
infinite, sunggyu, woohyun (always-a-girl)
pg, 1896w
woohee discovers sungkyung is dating the dance instructor. (001. student/teacher)
ao3 mirror
Sungkyung is dating the dance instructor. Woohee finds this out accidentally when she’s coming out of the bathroom before practice and she hears Sungkyung’s voice coming down the hall, followed by a low male voice. Woohee freezes when she recognizes it as Dongmin’s. She peers around the corner and sees two people standing by the wall facing each other, one of them in the grey hoodie Sungkyung always wears to practice. Woohee can’t tell if they’re kissing or talking, but they’re standing very close and talking very quietly, except for Sungkyung’s occasional giggle.
It’s common knowledge that Sungkyung has a boyfriend - she’s always fiddling with the silver chain bracelet she wears on one wrist, clearly a present - but nobody has been able to find out who it is. Woohee had pictured some wild-looking rock guitarist in a leather jacket, a tall guy with big hands and smoky eyeliner awkwardly peering into a jewelry display case. Certainly not someone like Dongmin, with his ball caps and American hip-hop warmup music and kind-uncle smile.
Woohee waits until she hears their footsteps down the hall and the door to the practice room close before she moves again. When she enters the practice room, Sungkyung tilts her head at her. “You’re late,” she says. The other eight girls are already warming up, even Sungyeon.
“I wore the wrong shoes,” Woohee replies. Dongmin is at the front of the room talking to Hoyeon. When Woohee looks away from him she notices Sungkyung staring at her, but Sungkyung blinks and turns to stretch before Woohee can do anything else.
After their three hours of practice, Woohee waits for Minhye and Hoyeon so they can walk back to the dorm together as usual. The night air feels good on her bare legs. “I think Dongmin oppa is dating someone,” she says.
Hoyeon raises an eyebrow. “What makes you say that?”
“Just a hunch. Why, does that surprise you?”
“Kind of, I guess. So who do you think it is?”
“Oh...” Woohee shrugs. She feels good, like she’s keeping something warm inside her. “A hairstylist? I was just guessing.”
“Boring. Who cares,” says Minhye. “I really want ice cream.”
“We’re on a diet,” says Woohee.
“I know,” she says. “That’s the first thing I’m gonna do when we debut.”
“Get ice cream?” says Hoyeon. “You should be more ambitious.”
Minhye kicks at a rock and it scuttles down the sidewalk. “Everybody’s too ambitious,” she says.
Woohee tries to forget about it, but when she can’t sleep that night she starts thinking about Sungkyung and Dongmin. She wonders how many times they’ve kissed in the hallways before or after practice, Sungkyung standing on her tiptoes a bit, his thin mustache against her lips, her hair covering both their faces. Or maybe they don’t kiss; maybe Sungkyung just makes him hold hands and buy her jewelry. She could be that type, too.
Woohee tries to forget about it, but now she thinks about it all the time: whenever Sungkyung leaves to go for a run alone, when she locks herself in the bathroom to use the phone, when she fiddles with her bracelet while she’s waiting for something. Woohee watches her during dance practice more often than she watches herself in the mirror, counting how many lingering glances she gives Dongmin. She sees the difference between the way Dongmin moves Myungsoon’s arms to demonstrate a piece of choreography to her and the way he touches Sungkyung very carefully and quickly. The first time he touches Woohee’s shoulder to correct the angle Woohee flinches so hard that Dongjoo starts laughing. “Something wrong?” says Dongmin, laughing too. “I’m not going to hurt you.”
Woohee glances over at Sungkyung, but she’s looking at the mirror, marking the footwork. “Nothing,” she says. She rolls her shoulders forward. “Show me again?”
That’s the last dance practice they have as ten. Every time, Woohee expects the trainee elimination to take place like on a television show, with Lee Jungyeop reading out the list of who’s made it and who has to pack their bags and go home before the closing credits roll. Instead, it’s a quiet process: the eliminated candidates are taken aside and told the company’s decided to keep them in reserve for a future project (“the ‘we’re-sorry-you-suck’ talk”, Sungyeon calls it), and meanwhile the ones that are chosen to stay have a meeting together and are told they’re that much closer to debut. The more of these meetings Woohee goes to, the more she starts to feel the conspiratorial nature of it.
At the latest meeting, they’re down to seven. Sungkyung fiddles with her bracelet all through Jungyeop’s speech. Jungsook, Jiae, and Minhye are gone.
Woohee decides to bring it up at dinner that evening, when they’re talking about some male trainees that might be joining the company.
“I think someone like Dongmin oppa would be nice to date,” she says lightly. Sungkyung chokes on her soup, but it’s covered by Dongjoo’s laughter.
“Yah. You got a crush on him or something?” says Hoyeon. “This is the second time she’s brought him up this week,” she tells the others.
“He’s handsome, isn’t he? And talented.” Woohee shrugs and grins at Myungsoon, who’s sitting next to Sungkyung. “What’s not to like?”
“You have to be desperate,” groans Sungyeon. “The guy trainees are much better-looking. You don’t need to settle for a grandpa.”
Sungkyung shifts on the bench, looking down at her food. “That’s not very charitable,” says Woohee. She glances at Sungkyung. Sungkyung meets her eyes once, then stands up and leaves the table.
After dinner, Woohee and Sungkyung have vocal practice together. Sungkyung doesn’t say a word to Woohee the entire time, except to correct her when she sings a wrong line, her face and voice totally neutral. After practice Woohee expects the silent treatment to continue, but instead Sungkyung packs her things together and waits for her at the door. It’s a fifteen-minute walk back to the dorms from the studio. Woohee tries to think of something, anything that could put her on a different route, but the more she delays the more blank her mind becomes.
They’re barely out the front door before Sungkyung says, “What the fuck was that at dinner?”
Woohee feels so nervous that she has to talk. “What, dinner? I didn’t mean to finish all the yellow radish, next time tell me if you want--”
“Are you an idiot?” snaps Sungkyung. “Because you’re not an actress.”
In a way, Woohee’s relieved that she doesn’t have to play nice, though now there’s a different kind of pressure on her words. “You know, I wish I’d thought of it,” she says carefully. “It’s very smart of you.”
“Don’t you dare,” says Sungkyung. “Don’t say it.”
“It’s too bad Minhye couldn’t think of it first.”
“That’s it.” Sungkyung grabs Woohee’s wrist and pulls, and an electric current runs up and down Woohee’s body, thrill and fear crashing and overlapping until they wipe each other out and she feels nothing at all. Sungkyung pulls her into an alley off the main street and throws Woohee’s wrist down when she lets go. Woohee almost falls to the ground. “What the fuck is wrong with you? You’re jealous, is that it? You have a crush on him.”
Woohee laughs, but it’s full of air. “God, don’t be stupid. You’ll really take Hoyeon’s word over mine? Anyway, I’m glad you figured it out, because it’s obviously working out for you.”
“Do you really-- Do you really think that’s what it’s about?”
“Oh, come on. You can’t tell me you really like him.”
“Well, you would know, wouldn’t you?” Sungkyung’s voice is blustery, like she can’t get her words in order. “A model. We all know what that really means.”
“I auditioned,” says Woohee, her voice rising. “I didn’t just fucking bat my eyelashes and say, ‘Oh, sajangnim, I really love Nell, let me be a singer.’ Did you get a bracelet from him, too?"
Sungkyung sputters. “You...”
Woohee stares back at Sungkyung, chin lifted, waiting. Sungkyung’s hands are balled into fists.
“Fuck you,” she shouts at last. She turns and starts walking back towards the street.
Woohee can’t help it. “That’s the best you can do?”
Sungkyung spins on her heel. “I hope you...”
Woohee braces herself. She wants more of this, more of Sungkyung’s TV drama threats that scratch weakly at her skin and fall away, leaving her unharmed.
“I hope you debut,” Sungkyung says, and Woohee looks up, startled. “I really do.” Then she disappears around the corner.
Woohee doesn’t go home that night. She walks to Hongdae and sits in an all-night cafe, drinking iced green tea lattes and watching music videos play without sound on the wall. Her phone rings in her hands and she starts a bit. It’s Dongjoo.
“Where are you?” says Dongjoo as soon as she picks up. “Are you with unnie?”
“I’ll be back,” says Woohee, pushing the green tea slush around with her straw. She wonders if Minhye ever got her ice cream. “Wait. Isn’t Sungkyung with you?”
“No. I called her and she said she’d be home in the morning. Jungryul oppa’s going to hang her when she gets back. Both of you, I think.”
Woohee puts her straw in her mouth. It’s cold and most of the flavour has gone. “Why do you think that makes me want to come home?”
“Just come back, okay,” says Dongjoo, her voice strained, before she hangs up.
Woohee walks quietly when she comes in, fearing the worst, but no one else is awake, even when she goes into the bedroom and lies down in the vacant spot beside Sungji. Sungkyung’s spot is empty.
At dance practice the next day, Sungkyung is ten minutes late and stony-faced. Woohee is too afraid to look at her until Dongjoo says, “Where’d your bracelet go?”
Woohee turns her head sharply, surprised. Sungkyung is sitting on the floor tying her shoes. The sleeves of her hoodie are pushed up, and her wrists are bare. “I gave it back,” she says. She glances up at Woohee and Woohee looks away, her face heating. “Idols can’t date.”
“Aw, we’re not idols yet,” says Dongjoo. “You could’ve kept going.”
Sungkyung’s still looking at Woohee. “I’m going to be one,” she says, “and I’m going to do it my own way.”
She’s waiting for an answer. Woohee inhales, going into a side bend. The door opens and Dongmin walks in, and the others turn and greet him, their sneakers squeaking on the floor.
“You must not have really liked him, after all,” says Woohee quietly. Sungkyung gets up and goes to get her water bottle from the corner of the room. Woohee allows herself a shiver of victory before she turns and greets Dongmin and practice begins.