Okay, I've had it.
It seems like every day I wake up telling myself, "Today is going to be different, today I'm going to do all my homework when I get home, study for all my tests, and start living life". Unfortunately, every day it's always the same... come home after a day of lackluster classes, lay on the couch for two hours watching old episodes of Hey Arnold and Catdog, and spend the rest of the night on the computer. I'll be lucky if I get any homework done at all; that's reserved for the day after when I have a free moment in Physics or US History. Well I'm sick of this shit. I'm sick of feeling inadequate and I'm sick of not being able to do anything about it. There's a wonderful summer program I could be doing, but because I've waited till the last minute to get my letters of recommendation, I most likely won't be able to do it. Meanwhile, everyone else is doing another program at UCSB which pays them $1,000 and looks great on transcripts? Me? I'll be lucky if I even work this summer.
They say admitting something is the first step to recovering, but fuck, I've admitted for too long. No matter how many times I tell myself, "shape up, old top!" my old habits just find a way to sneak back into my life. Hell, I'm typing this right now, when I really should be working on my TPCAST assignment. I fucking HATE YOU procrastination. I HATE YOU.
Oh God, I don't know what to do about this. Should I buy a book? Should I just give up the fight? I'm growing desperate.
...
In other news, I picked up Ben Folds' new album Songs for Silverman on Monday. An excellent album indeed. Ben continues to amaze me. I wonder if he had a procrastination problem.
They say admitting something is the first step to recovering, but fuck, I've admitted for too long. No matter how many times I tell myself, "shape up, old top!" my old habits just find a way to sneak back into my life. Hell, I'm typing this right now, when I really should be working on my TPCAST assignment. I fucking HATE YOU procrastination. I HATE YOU.
Oh God, I don't know what to do about this. Should I buy a book? Should I just give up the fight? I'm growing desperate.
...
In other news, I picked up Ben Folds' new album Songs for Silverman on Monday. An excellent album indeed. Ben continues to amaze me. I wonder if he had a procrastination problem.