Just Because (kaisoo drabble)
title: Just Because
rating: pg
genre: angst
pairing: kyungsoo/jongin - kyungsoo-centric
length: drabble
warning : bad/awkward/english
summary: How to forget your first love ?
(filling this wonderful prompt)
BGM : SHINee - Y.O.U
[Read]I want to forget you. I want to hate you.
I wish i could forget about you. I wish i could hate everything about you.
But why are you the only thing i can think about ? Why do i smile when i think of you?
Just, please. Let me forget you.
I know i am the only one who feel this way. I know you don't love me this way.
But when you smile at me, i can stop myself from thinking that this smile means more. I know it's not true. I know i am making things up. But it feels so good.
So stop smiling at me.
Stop being nice to me.
Stop because i am falling even more.
Don't.
Why are you so nice to me? What do i mean to you?
Friend?
Right.
That's right, we are friends. But i want more, so what should i do?
Let's forget about each other. Let's hate each other. I can't stand being friend with you anymore. If i can't love you the way i want, i won't stay around you.
Because it's hard.
Because it hurts. So badly.
Because i feel like i could die from this pain at any moment.
When i don't reply to your texts, dont send me more asking why.
When i am cold toward you, dont ask me why i am acting like this.
Don't send my texts saying "i am thinking about you."
Because all these shitty actions confuse me. Damn so confusing.
Do you know how much it's hard to know that you will never ever be mine. Like i don't even have to try because i know, and you know, that you will never look at me.
What you should i do? I dont want to loose you.
But i want to hate you.
I already hate you. But i love you so much more.
I want you to be the one. I want you to be the only one. I want you to be my man. I want to love you.
My heart hurts so much. That heart which can't be yours.
Will i be fine without you? Will i be able yo forget you?
Will you be alright without me? Will you forget me? Will you miss me? Will you comeback to find me?
Even if i don't say it, i want you to hold on to me. I want you to say "don't go"; "stay with me" and maybe "i love you".
I am kidding myself.
I don't even remember when i fall for you. The first minute i saw you? Or the first second?
14 years later, i am still into you. I am pathetic, right? I know.
Sorry but honestly i can't. i can't bring myself to hate you. I can't stop myself from loving you.
And i don't plan to do so.
If i am really your best friend, help me.
Can you be the first one to hate on me?
Go head and hate me Jongin.
rating: pg
genre: angst
pairing: kyungsoo/jongin - kyungsoo-centric
length: drabble
warning : bad/awkward/english
summary: How to forget your first love ?
(filling this wonderful prompt)
BGM : SHINee - Y.O.U
[Read]I want to forget you. I want to hate you.
I wish i could forget about you. I wish i could hate everything about you.
But why are you the only thing i can think about ? Why do i smile when i think of you?
Just, please. Let me forget you.
I know i am the only one who feel this way. I know you don't love me this way.
But when you smile at me, i can stop myself from thinking that this smile means more. I know it's not true. I know i am making things up. But it feels so good.
So stop smiling at me.
Stop being nice to me.
Stop because i am falling even more.
Don't.
Why are you so nice to me? What do i mean to you?
Friend?
Right.
That's right, we are friends. But i want more, so what should i do?
Let's forget about each other. Let's hate each other. I can't stand being friend with you anymore. If i can't love you the way i want, i won't stay around you.
Because it's hard.
Because it hurts. So badly.
Because i feel like i could die from this pain at any moment.
When i don't reply to your texts, dont send me more asking why.
When i am cold toward you, dont ask me why i am acting like this.
Don't send my texts saying "i am thinking about you."
Because all these shitty actions confuse me. Damn so confusing.
Do you know how much it's hard to know that you will never ever be mine. Like i don't even have to try because i know, and you know, that you will never look at me.
What you should i do? I dont want to loose you.
But i want to hate you.
I already hate you. But i love you so much more.
I want you to be the one. I want you to be the only one. I want you to be my man. I want to love you.
My heart hurts so much. That heart which can't be yours.
Will i be fine without you? Will i be able yo forget you?
Will you be alright without me? Will you forget me? Will you miss me? Will you comeback to find me?
Even if i don't say it, i want you to hold on to me. I want you to say "don't go"; "stay with me" and maybe "i love you".
I am kidding myself.
I don't even remember when i fall for you. The first minute i saw you? Or the first second?
14 years later, i am still into you. I am pathetic, right? I know.
Sorry but honestly i can't. i can't bring myself to hate you. I can't stop myself from loving you.
And i don't plan to do so.
If i am really your best friend, help me.
Can you be the first one to hate on me?
Go head and hate me Jongin.