little pink pill
the remainder of my day was extremely bunk.
told my Manson videos to go fuck themselves, and instead watched "the sixth sense".
(here's where you're going to laugh...)
i cried at the end, when cole is confessing to his mom about talking to ghosts.
honestly, how fucking pathetic can i get???
something must be wrong with me...
after that, i couldn't stop crying for about an hour.
but then, i was just in a dead sort of mood.
i could have been held over a waterwell, with a chainsaw to my head, and i wouldn'tve cared.
(note: i'm terrified of waterwells & chainsaws...)
hopefully, that gives you a good idea of how i was feeling.
so i end up calling adam, talked to him for a short but sweet 10 minutes.
he made me feel a little better, just knowing he had a good day.
god, i love him... <3
then, at 8ish, i got off the phone w/ him and went to bed [hoping i wouldn't wake up...]
but of course, with my bad luck, i woke up at 9:30.
so my dad gave me this little pink pill that's supposed to make me groggy in the next half hour.
i'm really depending on this little fucker to help me sleep.
maybe i'll get a spirt of luck, and won't wake up...
and if i do, i'll just go to adam's and pull some risky stunts.
just so you know, i'm not suicidal.
i'm simply not afraid of death. not anymore.
because how i see it, all of this results in pure nothingness.
(although that's still something, it's still not much of anything at all...)
"it's our curse that makes this world so hopeless..." -- from the song i'm listening to [by Trivium].
yours truly,
the cute little dead girl
told my Manson videos to go fuck themselves, and instead watched "the sixth sense".
(here's where you're going to laugh...)
i cried at the end, when cole is confessing to his mom about talking to ghosts.
honestly, how fucking pathetic can i get???
something must be wrong with me...
after that, i couldn't stop crying for about an hour.
but then, i was just in a dead sort of mood.
i could have been held over a waterwell, with a chainsaw to my head, and i wouldn'tve cared.
(note: i'm terrified of waterwells & chainsaws...)
hopefully, that gives you a good idea of how i was feeling.
so i end up calling adam, talked to him for a short but sweet 10 minutes.
he made me feel a little better, just knowing he had a good day.
god, i love him... <3
then, at 8ish, i got off the phone w/ him and went to bed [hoping i wouldn't wake up...]
but of course, with my bad luck, i woke up at 9:30.
so my dad gave me this little pink pill that's supposed to make me groggy in the next half hour.
i'm really depending on this little fucker to help me sleep.
maybe i'll get a spirt of luck, and won't wake up...
and if i do, i'll just go to adam's and pull some risky stunts.
just so you know, i'm not suicidal.
i'm simply not afraid of death. not anymore.
because how i see it, all of this results in pure nothingness.
(although that's still something, it's still not much of anything at all...)
"it's our curse that makes this world so hopeless..." -- from the song i'm listening to [by Trivium].
yours truly,
the cute little dead girl