I Wanna Talk About the Sims
I've been playing the Sims again lately, as I've mentioned a couple times in the past few entries, and thinking about doing Sims posts again. Only problem is that A: the challenges I've been doing aren't that great for fun posts, and B: I keep forgetting to take screen shots of people and things.
Firstly I decided to do a challenge called The Asylum Challenge. I think Mel showed me it, but it's been ages since I first read about it, that I only kinda remember if it was her. Anyway, the basic gist of the thing is that you make a house of 8 people. One is your main, the rest are basically filler you have to take care of because you CAN NOT play them. You play your main and everyone else is left to their own horrible devices. Your main character has to have the traits 'loser' and 'insane'. Everyone else has to have 'absent minded' and 'hates the outdoors' (absent minded suuuuuuuucks, too, because you'll have a person who is super hungry, so they'll go to eat something, get a plate, put it on the table, and then fuck off to do something else while whining that they're staaaaarving as the food rots waiting for them). Their other traits can be whatever the hell you want (as long as it's not 'natural cook') so you can make them handy or a genius or one of the other 'good' traits, if you want. Then you roll a die to select their lifetime wish, and proceed to try to fulfill that wish. There's a bunch of other stuff about beds and chairs and stuff, but I'm not gonna go into all that.
My main girl (Lola) ended up with the lifetime wish to max her logic and handiness, which means that I spent my play time making her play chess and fix things NON STOP. So boring to talk about. 'Lola went up another level in handiness by fixing the sink, yay!' 'Ooh, Lola just got a skill challenge success for repairing that goddamn shower for the 900th time!' Yawn. Plus, as she was the only person I could play, she was the only one with a job, which meant a lot of time spent watching the rest of the house stand around watching one of the housemates play guitar, all while whining about being hungry and needing to pee. Just pee, you fuckers! Your free will is maxed out, just GO. It was pretty much awful, but I did manage to get some screen shots at the start, so we'll cut here and tuck them in.
First up we have Lola Dare, the girl who carried me through the game.
Ace boob flowers you got there.
I honestly can't remember what all traits Lola had other than the Insane and Loser, but I'm pretty sure that Handy and Genius were in there. How can you go wrong with an Insane Genius?
For the most part I just went with whatever the game gave me to start with on the characters (aside from Lola's hair, obviously), so what you see is what I got, and god only knows what their other traits were. I mashed random and then ditched the most expendable traits to give them the ones they had to have.
Anyway, next up: Jimbo Langstein.
He's got a great beard. Look at the coverage!
Jimbo ended up wanting to be a mixologist, so I think he might have had a little bit of an issue with the drink.
Clarice Sampson
I actually really like that shirt.
I don't remember a damn thing about Clarice save for that she kept making eyes at, like, ALL the dudes in the house.
Jilly Bean
Oh god, Jilly.
The game gave Jilly the traits 'Snob' and 'Mean'. EVERYONE in the house HATED Jilly. There were constant slap fights going on with her and she went out of her way to just be an utterly heinous bitch.
Wabash Jones
Sweet hat, dude.
The ladies LOVED Wabash. All the girls in the house (except Jilly, for she had nothing but hate in her heart) wanted a sweet piece of that skinny ass cowboy. Even Lola made smootchie face on him at one point.
Mahandra Aaronson
You can't see her awesome strappy boots here, but she wore them with EVERY outfit.
I named Mahandra after Traci Thoms' character on Wonderfalls, because that was the best show ever. Mahandra's the only one that stayed in the house in the end.
Candi Kane
Yes, I know, it's an awful name.
In my head, Candi's backstory was that she used to be a stripper. It's kinda funny, though, because with all the bikinis in the game, she's the only one who defaulted to a tasteful one piece swimmy suit.
Gavin Price
Nice watch.
I was initially going to have Lola marry Gavin once everything was said and done, but that was not meant to be.
And, of course, home sweet home, the asylum itself.
I'm sure the creepy towers are just for show.
There ya go, the whole happy family, and Jilly.
So, when you have one person that you're playing, and you're trying to get them to get their skills up so that you can finish a challenge, HOPEFULLY before everyone starts dying off, AND also gain skills to get them promoted at their job so you can keep the repo company from coming and taking one of you're four beds, they develop NO friendships with anyone. Everyone in the house was super besties (except for Jilly), but Lola had them all as sort of vague acquaintances. That's how all my games go, though. I'm like NO, no social interaction, you need to go paint for 17 hours. I'm SO GLAD she didn't get, like, the 'have 30 best friends' lifetime wish or else I'd have never gotten it done.
Some things that were interesting in the course of the game, though were that:
1: Someone burnt down the kitchen, like, on day two. Then they all stood around it freaking out because I couldn't make them call the fire department. Luckily Lola was home, so I had her call and then go spray flame retardant chemicals on it and her roommates while waiting for the fireman to come and do the same thing. I think more foam got on the house inhabitants than the fire. And, of course, then I had to buy a new stove. Boo.
2: Once Lola started getting some fame (thank you, Late Night expansion), I had paps on the front porch all night, every night. At one point there were two, and the dude kept asking the chick pap her sign and flirting with her, but she was SO not into it, and kept slapping the shit out of him. I'm frankly amazed that the dude wasn't wearing a fedora during the whole thing, what with the amount of 'not taking a hint' he was working. Later on another pap was hanging out around the side of the house and randomly died (he was old), so the whole house ran out to watch the Reaper scythe bash him into the afterworld, and then scurried back inside all miserable because they'd let fresh air get on their skin, and that's just gross.
3: I decided to hook up Lola and Jimbo, so once the challenge was over I could marry them off super fast and start pumping out babies for the next challenge I was going to do. Unfortunately it seemed like macking on him made the rest of the house realize that, HEY, we can all flirt and make out with each other! So they did. Like cats in heat. Jimbo was flirting with Clarice. Clarice was flirting with Wabash. Wabash was making eyes at Candi. Candi was giving Gavin sexy massages. Mahandra was chatting with people on the internet because she never really got into that whole thing. And Jilly continued to be horrible to everyone. So not only was everyone making eyes at everyone else, but everyone was getting pissed at everyone else because A was flirting with B when they were supposed to be flirting with THEM. Not only that, but it seems like a Sim can smell potential infidelity like a fart in a car, because I had people wake up from a dead sleep on an entirely different floor to go yell at the person they were flirting with for flirting with someone else. It was a mess.
Since Jimbo wouldn't stop flirting with Clarice and Lola was starting to hate both of them, I decided to ditch that avenue of love and go for someone else later. Or, once I finished my challenge, marry Clarice off to someone else and huck them out of the house so as to get rid of the competition. >_> That didn't come to pass, either, though.
Eventually everyone got all eldered and I started panicking that they would all die before I was done, since I was still, like, four logic points away from finishing Lola's wish. Then one day, while going through everyone's inventories to put the books back on the bookshelf for the night, I saw that Wabash had a wish to kiss someone, and that made me SO SAD. Here's this old dude that had been locked in this asylum for years with all these lovely ladies, and he'd never gotten so much as a first kiss. Poor bastard. :( So since I had bought Lola the 'Master of Seduction' perk (MY FAVOURITE), I had her flirt at him a lot and give him a kiss so that he wouldn't die having never gotten a single smooch. Then he went off to flirt with Candi for awhile and Lola decided she hated him again. Oh well. It was a noble effort, at least.
Finally, FINALLY I managed to get Lola's lifetime wish fulfilled, and in honour of it, everyone got a second lease on life! Yay! (basically, I went into the cheat menu and edited them all back to being young adults, and changed their traits to get rid of the asylum ones and to make Jilly a decent human being that could get along with people) And then, it was MARRYING time.
Since everyone in the house was already buds, it took like no effort to start pairing them off. Wabash and Candi got married first, and promptly were moved out to a new house to start their new life together. They're both dead now, and they never had any kids.
Jimbo and Clarice got married next, and since the house wasn't packed to the gills anymore, I had Clarice get pregnant before they moved out. They're both dead now, too, but their son Sammy lives on. I think he's a vampire now. Funny thing is that one time they invited Lola to a party and it turned out their house didn't have a crib, so baby Sammy was just left to sleep on the dining room floor. Lovely parenting, Sims.
After that I tried desperately to get Gavin and Lola together, but it just was not working for some reason, so he got married to the new and improved Jilly and moved out. As of right now I think that they're both still alive. Or one of them is. But they also never had any kids, either.
That just left Mahandra and Lola, and since Challenge #2 was the Perfect Heir challenge (proceed through 10 generations of a family with a sim with the same hair and eye colour as their parent), and I don't have any same sex baby mods on the game right now, I couldn't marry them up. Instead Lola married some dude named Ethan that she met...somewhere, and Mahandra never married. She did garden a lot, though.
By this point Lola was totally a vampire, which is undoubtedly cheating, but I had NO illusions that I was going to get a properly coloured baby first try. And I didn't. Oh god I didn't. I also never took screen caps of ANY of the kids, and only remembered that I should be after I started moving them out. Whoops.
First on the baby roster were the twins, Embry and Lexi. Lexi ended up being a vampire, like mommy, but Embry was human, which I found SUPER wacky. I've never had a vampire have a human baby (at least, not until I got Supernatural, but I don't have that right now). Both of them had daddy's black hair and dark eyes (though, being a vampire, Lexi's weren't brown, they were orange), so they were right out. Once they hit adult, they moved out together into a nice little house. Mally decided because of that that they had a very Lannister sort of relationship going, if you know what I mean. It looks like Embry has a girlfriend now, though, which is kinda creepy since his gf is sisters with the gf of his brother...
Liam. Liam was the next in line for being born, and while he got momma's pink hair, he also got the brown/orange eyes of his dad. Damn. Liam and his girl have a kid, Nate, who also got pink hair.
Then there was Evan (pink and brown/orange), another set of twins; Lydia and Eric (black and brown/orange for Lydia, black and proper bright green for Eric), Lindsay the human (black and brown), and Edwin the human (black and brown). Then, after eight kids, Ethan died of old age. Sad. :( In keeping with my Sims theme, he totally died on Lindsay's child to teen birthday, because my Sims birthday's are always paid for in blooooooood.
Mahandra died two days later.
While still morning for Mahandra, but already totally over Ethan dying, Lola got remarried to a merman named Bronson and started the baby party all over again. Baby #9 was another black haired, brown eyed kid (apparently Lola likes her husbands with a certain colouring) named Linus, so we're still not done yet. Looking at the family tree, though, it looks like Bronson's mom is dating Sammy Langstein, so it all just comes back together, doesn't it? Amusing thing is that, at one point, it totally looked like Sammy and Embry were going to be a thing. At one point Sammy called up the house while Embry was getting ready for school, asking if he wanted to go on a date, so I said sure and sent him off. Turns out the place of this date was basically an abandoned field, and Sammy wasn't a high schooler anymore. So some adult asked me wee teen boy to meet him in an abandoned field for a date. That's not creepy at all.
So, that's where I am now. 9 kids down, one with the right eye colour, two with the right hair colour. Right now six of the kids are still in the house, so I have to wait for them to age out before I can try for baby #10. Ugh.
I was telling Jer the other day that raising a LOT of Sim babies is a lot like raising a baby in real life. You know that their infancy and toddlerhood has to have happened, after all, they exist, but fuck if you can remember anything that happened during it. Aside from the creeper date and everyone dying off one after another, I couldn't tell you jack about what's gone on. It's all been potty training, learning to walk, and trying to keep enough leftovers in the fridge for the kids to eat.
And, with that, it's time to go back to the baby mines. Wish me luck.
Firstly I decided to do a challenge called The Asylum Challenge. I think Mel showed me it, but it's been ages since I first read about it, that I only kinda remember if it was her. Anyway, the basic gist of the thing is that you make a house of 8 people. One is your main, the rest are basically filler you have to take care of because you CAN NOT play them. You play your main and everyone else is left to their own horrible devices. Your main character has to have the traits 'loser' and 'insane'. Everyone else has to have 'absent minded' and 'hates the outdoors' (absent minded suuuuuuuucks, too, because you'll have a person who is super hungry, so they'll go to eat something, get a plate, put it on the table, and then fuck off to do something else while whining that they're staaaaarving as the food rots waiting for them). Their other traits can be whatever the hell you want (as long as it's not 'natural cook') so you can make them handy or a genius or one of the other 'good' traits, if you want. Then you roll a die to select their lifetime wish, and proceed to try to fulfill that wish. There's a bunch of other stuff about beds and chairs and stuff, but I'm not gonna go into all that.
My main girl (Lola) ended up with the lifetime wish to max her logic and handiness, which means that I spent my play time making her play chess and fix things NON STOP. So boring to talk about. 'Lola went up another level in handiness by fixing the sink, yay!' 'Ooh, Lola just got a skill challenge success for repairing that goddamn shower for the 900th time!' Yawn. Plus, as she was the only person I could play, she was the only one with a job, which meant a lot of time spent watching the rest of the house stand around watching one of the housemates play guitar, all while whining about being hungry and needing to pee. Just pee, you fuckers! Your free will is maxed out, just GO. It was pretty much awful, but I did manage to get some screen shots at the start, so we'll cut here and tuck them in.
First up we have Lola Dare, the girl who carried me through the game.
Ace boob flowers you got there.
I honestly can't remember what all traits Lola had other than the Insane and Loser, but I'm pretty sure that Handy and Genius were in there. How can you go wrong with an Insane Genius?
For the most part I just went with whatever the game gave me to start with on the characters (aside from Lola's hair, obviously), so what you see is what I got, and god only knows what their other traits were. I mashed random and then ditched the most expendable traits to give them the ones they had to have.
Anyway, next up: Jimbo Langstein.
He's got a great beard. Look at the coverage!
Jimbo ended up wanting to be a mixologist, so I think he might have had a little bit of an issue with the drink.
Clarice Sampson
I actually really like that shirt.
I don't remember a damn thing about Clarice save for that she kept making eyes at, like, ALL the dudes in the house.
Jilly Bean
Oh god, Jilly.
The game gave Jilly the traits 'Snob' and 'Mean'. EVERYONE in the house HATED Jilly. There were constant slap fights going on with her and she went out of her way to just be an utterly heinous bitch.
Wabash Jones
Sweet hat, dude.
The ladies LOVED Wabash. All the girls in the house (except Jilly, for she had nothing but hate in her heart) wanted a sweet piece of that skinny ass cowboy. Even Lola made smootchie face on him at one point.
Mahandra Aaronson
You can't see her awesome strappy boots here, but she wore them with EVERY outfit.
I named Mahandra after Traci Thoms' character on Wonderfalls, because that was the best show ever. Mahandra's the only one that stayed in the house in the end.
Candi Kane
Yes, I know, it's an awful name.
In my head, Candi's backstory was that she used to be a stripper. It's kinda funny, though, because with all the bikinis in the game, she's the only one who defaulted to a tasteful one piece swimmy suit.
Gavin Price
Nice watch.
I was initially going to have Lola marry Gavin once everything was said and done, but that was not meant to be.
And, of course, home sweet home, the asylum itself.
I'm sure the creepy towers are just for show.
There ya go, the whole happy family, and Jilly.
So, when you have one person that you're playing, and you're trying to get them to get their skills up so that you can finish a challenge, HOPEFULLY before everyone starts dying off, AND also gain skills to get them promoted at their job so you can keep the repo company from coming and taking one of you're four beds, they develop NO friendships with anyone. Everyone in the house was super besties (except for Jilly), but Lola had them all as sort of vague acquaintances. That's how all my games go, though. I'm like NO, no social interaction, you need to go paint for 17 hours. I'm SO GLAD she didn't get, like, the 'have 30 best friends' lifetime wish or else I'd have never gotten it done.
Some things that were interesting in the course of the game, though were that:
1: Someone burnt down the kitchen, like, on day two. Then they all stood around it freaking out because I couldn't make them call the fire department. Luckily Lola was home, so I had her call and then go spray flame retardant chemicals on it and her roommates while waiting for the fireman to come and do the same thing. I think more foam got on the house inhabitants than the fire. And, of course, then I had to buy a new stove. Boo.
2: Once Lola started getting some fame (thank you, Late Night expansion), I had paps on the front porch all night, every night. At one point there were two, and the dude kept asking the chick pap her sign and flirting with her, but she was SO not into it, and kept slapping the shit out of him. I'm frankly amazed that the dude wasn't wearing a fedora during the whole thing, what with the amount of 'not taking a hint' he was working. Later on another pap was hanging out around the side of the house and randomly died (he was old), so the whole house ran out to watch the Reaper scythe bash him into the afterworld, and then scurried back inside all miserable because they'd let fresh air get on their skin, and that's just gross.
3: I decided to hook up Lola and Jimbo, so once the challenge was over I could marry them off super fast and start pumping out babies for the next challenge I was going to do. Unfortunately it seemed like macking on him made the rest of the house realize that, HEY, we can all flirt and make out with each other! So they did. Like cats in heat. Jimbo was flirting with Clarice. Clarice was flirting with Wabash. Wabash was making eyes at Candi. Candi was giving Gavin sexy massages. Mahandra was chatting with people on the internet because she never really got into that whole thing. And Jilly continued to be horrible to everyone. So not only was everyone making eyes at everyone else, but everyone was getting pissed at everyone else because A was flirting with B when they were supposed to be flirting with THEM. Not only that, but it seems like a Sim can smell potential infidelity like a fart in a car, because I had people wake up from a dead sleep on an entirely different floor to go yell at the person they were flirting with for flirting with someone else. It was a mess.
Since Jimbo wouldn't stop flirting with Clarice and Lola was starting to hate both of them, I decided to ditch that avenue of love and go for someone else later. Or, once I finished my challenge, marry Clarice off to someone else and huck them out of the house so as to get rid of the competition. >_> That didn't come to pass, either, though.
Eventually everyone got all eldered and I started panicking that they would all die before I was done, since I was still, like, four logic points away from finishing Lola's wish. Then one day, while going through everyone's inventories to put the books back on the bookshelf for the night, I saw that Wabash had a wish to kiss someone, and that made me SO SAD. Here's this old dude that had been locked in this asylum for years with all these lovely ladies, and he'd never gotten so much as a first kiss. Poor bastard. :( So since I had bought Lola the 'Master of Seduction' perk (MY FAVOURITE), I had her flirt at him a lot and give him a kiss so that he wouldn't die having never gotten a single smooch. Then he went off to flirt with Candi for awhile and Lola decided she hated him again. Oh well. It was a noble effort, at least.
Finally, FINALLY I managed to get Lola's lifetime wish fulfilled, and in honour of it, everyone got a second lease on life! Yay! (basically, I went into the cheat menu and edited them all back to being young adults, and changed their traits to get rid of the asylum ones and to make Jilly a decent human being that could get along with people) And then, it was MARRYING time.
Since everyone in the house was already buds, it took like no effort to start pairing them off. Wabash and Candi got married first, and promptly were moved out to a new house to start their new life together. They're both dead now, and they never had any kids.
Jimbo and Clarice got married next, and since the house wasn't packed to the gills anymore, I had Clarice get pregnant before they moved out. They're both dead now, too, but their son Sammy lives on. I think he's a vampire now. Funny thing is that one time they invited Lola to a party and it turned out their house didn't have a crib, so baby Sammy was just left to sleep on the dining room floor. Lovely parenting, Sims.
After that I tried desperately to get Gavin and Lola together, but it just was not working for some reason, so he got married to the new and improved Jilly and moved out. As of right now I think that they're both still alive. Or one of them is. But they also never had any kids, either.
That just left Mahandra and Lola, and since Challenge #2 was the Perfect Heir challenge (proceed through 10 generations of a family with a sim with the same hair and eye colour as their parent), and I don't have any same sex baby mods on the game right now, I couldn't marry them up. Instead Lola married some dude named Ethan that she met...somewhere, and Mahandra never married. She did garden a lot, though.
By this point Lola was totally a vampire, which is undoubtedly cheating, but I had NO illusions that I was going to get a properly coloured baby first try. And I didn't. Oh god I didn't. I also never took screen caps of ANY of the kids, and only remembered that I should be after I started moving them out. Whoops.
First on the baby roster were the twins, Embry and Lexi. Lexi ended up being a vampire, like mommy, but Embry was human, which I found SUPER wacky. I've never had a vampire have a human baby (at least, not until I got Supernatural, but I don't have that right now). Both of them had daddy's black hair and dark eyes (though, being a vampire, Lexi's weren't brown, they were orange), so they were right out. Once they hit adult, they moved out together into a nice little house. Mally decided because of that that they had a very Lannister sort of relationship going, if you know what I mean. It looks like Embry has a girlfriend now, though, which is kinda creepy since his gf is sisters with the gf of his brother...
Liam. Liam was the next in line for being born, and while he got momma's pink hair, he also got the brown/orange eyes of his dad. Damn. Liam and his girl have a kid, Nate, who also got pink hair.
Then there was Evan (pink and brown/orange), another set of twins; Lydia and Eric (black and brown/orange for Lydia, black and proper bright green for Eric), Lindsay the human (black and brown), and Edwin the human (black and brown). Then, after eight kids, Ethan died of old age. Sad. :( In keeping with my Sims theme, he totally died on Lindsay's child to teen birthday, because my Sims birthday's are always paid for in blooooooood.
Mahandra died two days later.
While still morning for Mahandra, but already totally over Ethan dying, Lola got remarried to a merman named Bronson and started the baby party all over again. Baby #9 was another black haired, brown eyed kid (apparently Lola likes her husbands with a certain colouring) named Linus, so we're still not done yet. Looking at the family tree, though, it looks like Bronson's mom is dating Sammy Langstein, so it all just comes back together, doesn't it? Amusing thing is that, at one point, it totally looked like Sammy and Embry were going to be a thing. At one point Sammy called up the house while Embry was getting ready for school, asking if he wanted to go on a date, so I said sure and sent him off. Turns out the place of this date was basically an abandoned field, and Sammy wasn't a high schooler anymore. So some adult asked me wee teen boy to meet him in an abandoned field for a date. That's not creepy at all.
So, that's where I am now. 9 kids down, one with the right eye colour, two with the right hair colour. Right now six of the kids are still in the house, so I have to wait for them to age out before I can try for baby #10. Ugh.
I was telling Jer the other day that raising a LOT of Sim babies is a lot like raising a baby in real life. You know that their infancy and toddlerhood has to have happened, after all, they exist, but fuck if you can remember anything that happened during it. Aside from the creeper date and everyone dying off one after another, I couldn't tell you jack about what's gone on. It's all been potty training, learning to walk, and trying to keep enough leftovers in the fridge for the kids to eat.
And, with that, it's time to go back to the baby mines. Wish me luck.