Heroes fic: How You Sleep (7/12?)

[gaiafaye]

Title: How You Sleep - Chapter 7: What's in Reach (7/12?)
Series: Heroes
Pairing: Mylar
Rating: R
Warnings: Mpreg! BS science! Fairly dark! Consent issues!
Summary: After being doused with the complete formula, Mohinder copes with a lingering side effect as he and everyone around him try to rebuild their lives and their trust.

Prologue | 1 | 2 | 3

Comments

Back!

[seraphtrevs]

- The nursery scene was hi-larious - so many lols. I loved these lines especially:

"I will pick an array of matching, ducky things, and you will love them and buy them."

and

"She offered me the same, but I don't want to look like some pampered princess to my roommate."

"Did you just call me pampered?"

"I think she called you a princess," Mohinder said around a mouthful of pasta.

And I love the way that Clarie and Peter have become such good friends to Mohinder - it's something that makes me all smiley. Seriously, I couldn't stop smiling when I read it. You have a great way of writing dialog that really highlights the bonds they've started to form - how they can hang out and tease each other.

- And I loved how welcoming everyone was to Emma (lol Claire's line about how Peter thinks she's pretty. XD I shipped them so hard.) You get this feeling that, yeah, okay, maybe this time around the Company is going to get it right. Same with Mohinder's vow to help Tracy. (Although if everything spectacularly blows up, that's great too - I have a masochistic streak. :P)

- I was so thrilled to see Molly and Mohinder's mom show up! Oh my God, Molly is breaking my heart - the scene where she blew up was so well-played, and I'm so glad that she finally got her say about how Mohinder has treated her. That was so immensely satisfying for me. I loved how she was working with Micah - I think that was in the comics canon? Anyway, it's brilliant, and Molly is an amazing kid, and Mohinder is lucky to have her and he better start being a better adoptive dad. >:( And Mohinder's mom is also amazing - I love how no-nonsense she is, and watching her and Mohinder try to out-stubborn each other is lots of fun (I bet Mohinder's teenage years were hellish.)

- I've been waiting for Peter and Mohinder to have That Conversation about Sylar, and you pulled it off beautifully. They both have really complicated feelings about Sylar, and it was great to see them try to work through those issues together. Peter's experience with Sylar ~in the future~ was a trainwreck in canon, but you used it to great effect here.

And Mohinder's explanation as to why he decided to keep the baby was perfect - it makes sense in a very fucked-up way. How he's moved from seeing the baby as a punishment to starting to welcome it makes sense, too.

I loved Peter's line: "It was a very bad future, Mohinder. You talked about punishment, and in that place... Whatever decision you made about the baby, being able to make it is better than where we could be." - that's what this whole fic seems like to me - having these characters try to make decisions that aren't massively self-destructive.

- And OMG LOVE LOVE LOVE THE FLASHBACK SCENE. Ha ha, you know it's kind of funny - I was thinking about my own fic and yours the other day and how we're both writing Mylar, but we're both also doing a lot of dancing around actual Mohinder/Sylar interaction. I don't know how it's working in my fic, but in this one - wow, the absence just makes it more exciting when we do get these flashback scenes, or the brief scene with Nathan!Sylar. It's just so charged. That whole scene was beautiful - you have some really lovely descriptions, and you could just feel that connection that they had. And I just about died at these lines:

He stood close and fingered a fold in Sylar's sleeve. "It seems unnecessary to have two rooms." He could dive headfirst into this unknown, if only Sylar was ready to do the same.

Sylar stuck his hands deep in his pockets, as if they'd try to escape. "It might seem different in the morning."

There's just like a million things going on there, and I adore it.

So YAY YAY YAY, looking forward to the next chapter! :DDDDDD

Re: Back!

[gaiafaye]

I think showing the bonds between characters is a great change of pace from the canon method of having the characters behave like people you're not sure you'd want to be friends with, yet they manage to form bonds offscreen... ;) But seriously, I'm glad it made you happy, because I enjoyed writing it! (And these bonds will definitely be important later...)

Molly's rant was a late addition. Like, at first I was just going to have Mohinder scold her about being in danger, but then I had one of those oh-duh moments, because she has plenty to be pissed at Mohinder about! And she did work with Micah in canon, but I'm not really following that. In my head, she just got calls/texts/etc. from Micah now and then asking her to find people.

Haha, I like how you say I used Peter's adventure in the future effectively, when I basically just tried to be as brief about it as possible. I think mentioning waffles tends to distract from serious moments...

I think the dancing-around-Mylar in your fic is working out great! I mean, Sylar isn't going to get what he wants out of Mohinder until he sorts himself out, i.e. realizes that just because he wants something from Mohinder doesn't mean he's entitled to it by any means possible. Er, not to mention all his other problems.

I'm glad the dancing is working for you in my fic. It really is just a big build-up of atmosphere.

Thank you for another detailed, constructive comment, btw. :)