(no subject)
huwwo..............ok im bored again so what else do i do but come on here...
yah so im just gonna make this entry about random things goin on right now...
hmmm im doing really good in school and its kinda weird.
i dont hang out with pam anymore which is sad.
rachi and kayla and ashley dont like me really. or atleast they dont like to talk to me.
same thing either way i guess... but its ok i guess. i say hi to them and they say hi to me and i can deal with that sense we dont really have much in common anyways.
i have noticed this year that my friends that i really hang out with a lot recently, all have my interests and like them as much as i do! so maybe im just realizing whats important to me.... I made sooooo many new friends last year but i now know that its not how many i have but whether i can have fun with them. if they can make me laugh all the time, do things with me, are happy to see me and treat me like their close friend ALL the time, then i know they are true friends. Angela is a really close friend now. I have so much fun with her and we have sooo much in common. Me and cindy are obviously close. shes my best friend and i love her and we talk as much as possible and have like everything in common. Its kind of weird that last year i was so set on making all these new friends but now my 2 closest friends, are people i had before. i guess its true that you never really notice what you have.
hmmmm... yah then theres pam...we used to be really close... but now we dont see eachother very often. im having a hard time remembering what we had in common...she doesnt like gackt very much anymore and im obsessed...she draws still... but not so much anime anymore... i dont even know if she likes anime anymore at all? did she ever? maybe she didnt and i didnt really notice. shes not learning japanese anymore. thats my main thing right now. also she doesnt even seem like she wants to. then there is the thing that has always bugged me. i dont think she notices that she does it, but whenever she is around her friends (juniors or seniors etc) she just treats me differently... i dont know what it is, but its different. Also, whenever we are alone, we dont have much to say....i cant even talk to her about my crush this time, because she doesnt like him at all. now i know that it sounds like we would barely make good friends but i really miss her. whenever i think about it, i get sad and wish we could spend more time together but i dont even understand how i can miss hanging out with her when theres nothing to talk to or even really to do together. *sigh* its just so complicated.
so yah my life at home kinda sucks.... my mom got surgery and is on bed rest for 6 weeks.... which means that me and her (stupid) boyfriend need to help out...hah... more like me do everything around the house, shopping (even though i cant drive) and cook etc as well as do my homework and somehow sleep enough so that i can stay awake at school and pass so i can finally get out of this stupid hell hole and not have to live in poverty my whole life. It soooo bugs me that not only is the stupid bastard without a job, ruining his life and mine temporarily, but he has dragged my mom down with him. hes heartless, fat, lazy, jack ass who should just go die and leave me and my mom alone.
so anyway back to cindy. i really miss her! i spent 5 weeks with her 24/7 and so this whole seperation thing is really hard for both of us. we talk on the phone everyday and write letters to each other. its really fun because im teaching her japanese and shes teaching me chinese. its so cool that me and her have like everything in common and we spend hours on the phone talking about everything! i miss seeing her and hugging her and i miss everything about her. if it werent against my religion id probably be in love with her. its kinda funny... but on halloween, (for those of you who didnt know) we had a party at her house and me and her and kase and leo and pete were playing truth or dare and me and cindy had to kiss. i think that was the happiest moment of my life........its probably a good thing she doesnt go on here anymore because i could never tell her these things. shed think i was weird lol and whether or not we meant it, our relationship would change for the worse. i wouldnt ever do anything to jeapordize our friendship.
so yah.... this is getting kinda long. sooooo....
wait, angela showed me advent children finally and i love kadaj sooooo much!!! hes like gackt lol and so im in love and hes sooo cute >.< eeek.
oh you know whats funny, i was walking in the hallway and i was digging through my little bag from japan and i almost literally ran into alvin and sina and sina (who is soooo sweet) was like "oops dont run her over!" she said it so adorably, im glad were friends now. i still think alvin is hott lol but i dont like like him, i didnt ever like like him i just thought her was really cute.
sooo yah that ends my therepy session...haha l'arc en ciel.....*cough*
ok buh bye
love always,
ama
yah so im just gonna make this entry about random things goin on right now...
hmmm im doing really good in school and its kinda weird.
i dont hang out with pam anymore which is sad.
rachi and kayla and ashley dont like me really. or atleast they dont like to talk to me.
same thing either way i guess... but its ok i guess. i say hi to them and they say hi to me and i can deal with that sense we dont really have much in common anyways.
i have noticed this year that my friends that i really hang out with a lot recently, all have my interests and like them as much as i do! so maybe im just realizing whats important to me.... I made sooooo many new friends last year but i now know that its not how many i have but whether i can have fun with them. if they can make me laugh all the time, do things with me, are happy to see me and treat me like their close friend ALL the time, then i know they are true friends. Angela is a really close friend now. I have so much fun with her and we have sooo much in common. Me and cindy are obviously close. shes my best friend and i love her and we talk as much as possible and have like everything in common. Its kind of weird that last year i was so set on making all these new friends but now my 2 closest friends, are people i had before. i guess its true that you never really notice what you have.
hmmmm... yah then theres pam...we used to be really close... but now we dont see eachother very often. im having a hard time remembering what we had in common...she doesnt like gackt very much anymore and im obsessed...she draws still... but not so much anime anymore... i dont even know if she likes anime anymore at all? did she ever? maybe she didnt and i didnt really notice. shes not learning japanese anymore. thats my main thing right now. also she doesnt even seem like she wants to. then there is the thing that has always bugged me. i dont think she notices that she does it, but whenever she is around her friends (juniors or seniors etc) she just treats me differently... i dont know what it is, but its different. Also, whenever we are alone, we dont have much to say....i cant even talk to her about my crush this time, because she doesnt like him at all. now i know that it sounds like we would barely make good friends but i really miss her. whenever i think about it, i get sad and wish we could spend more time together but i dont even understand how i can miss hanging out with her when theres nothing to talk to or even really to do together. *sigh* its just so complicated.
so yah my life at home kinda sucks.... my mom got surgery and is on bed rest for 6 weeks.... which means that me and her (stupid) boyfriend need to help out...hah... more like me do everything around the house, shopping (even though i cant drive) and cook etc as well as do my homework and somehow sleep enough so that i can stay awake at school and pass so i can finally get out of this stupid hell hole and not have to live in poverty my whole life. It soooo bugs me that not only is the stupid bastard without a job, ruining his life and mine temporarily, but he has dragged my mom down with him. hes heartless, fat, lazy, jack ass who should just go die and leave me and my mom alone.
so anyway back to cindy. i really miss her! i spent 5 weeks with her 24/7 and so this whole seperation thing is really hard for both of us. we talk on the phone everyday and write letters to each other. its really fun because im teaching her japanese and shes teaching me chinese. its so cool that me and her have like everything in common and we spend hours on the phone talking about everything! i miss seeing her and hugging her and i miss everything about her. if it werent against my religion id probably be in love with her. its kinda funny... but on halloween, (for those of you who didnt know) we had a party at her house and me and her and kase and leo and pete were playing truth or dare and me and cindy had to kiss. i think that was the happiest moment of my life........its probably a good thing she doesnt go on here anymore because i could never tell her these things. shed think i was weird lol and whether or not we meant it, our relationship would change for the worse. i wouldnt ever do anything to jeapordize our friendship.
so yah.... this is getting kinda long. sooooo....
wait, angela showed me advent children finally and i love kadaj sooooo much!!! hes like gackt lol and so im in love and hes sooo cute >.< eeek.
oh you know whats funny, i was walking in the hallway and i was digging through my little bag from japan and i almost literally ran into alvin and sina and sina (who is soooo sweet) was like "oops dont run her over!" she said it so adorably, im glad were friends now. i still think alvin is hott lol but i dont like like him, i didnt ever like like him i just thought her was really cute.
sooo yah that ends my therepy session...haha l'arc en ciel.....*cough*
ok buh bye
love always,
ama