(no subject)
my dad asked about school last night...
i almost laughed in his face. i know he just wants me to do well for myself, but school drives me crazy.
it took so much energy just to go get groceries today that i had to take a nap, which lasted a few hours, and i'm still tired.
when i'm around people, its like i can feel everything that they feel at the moment that we come into even the most brief contact. its completely overwhelming, and it only gets worse when i'm tired or depressed.
when i'm at school, it feels like a buzzing kind of. like emotional static, and its so loud that its hard for me to focus. there's all these kids trying to figure themselves out, and i can almost hear it happening.
the thought of going back gives me so much anxiety that my throat starts tightening like i'm about to cry, and my mind starts to go numb.
so basically i can do one of two things. i can go to school, and be either anxious or numb for a fairly large portion of my life, and probably fail my classes anyways; or i can try something new.
i have thought a lot about it, and i've decided to try and be free for a while, and see where my feet take me. i plan on working, and writing. constantly. hit me up if you need help with a paper, i'm like a machine.
i almost laughed in his face. i know he just wants me to do well for myself, but school drives me crazy.
it took so much energy just to go get groceries today that i had to take a nap, which lasted a few hours, and i'm still tired.
when i'm around people, its like i can feel everything that they feel at the moment that we come into even the most brief contact. its completely overwhelming, and it only gets worse when i'm tired or depressed.
when i'm at school, it feels like a buzzing kind of. like emotional static, and its so loud that its hard for me to focus. there's all these kids trying to figure themselves out, and i can almost hear it happening.
the thought of going back gives me so much anxiety that my throat starts tightening like i'm about to cry, and my mind starts to go numb.
so basically i can do one of two things. i can go to school, and be either anxious or numb for a fairly large portion of my life, and probably fail my classes anyways; or i can try something new.
i have thought a lot about it, and i've decided to try and be free for a while, and see where my feet take me. i plan on working, and writing. constantly. hit me up if you need help with a paper, i'm like a machine.