lol joku lingvisti
I have such a huge academic hard-on for languages and linguistics. The English Translation Department has two obligatory Finnish courses, of which Kielenhuolto is the most annoying, anal course ever: every week we get at least four to five pages of punctuation, compound noun and verb conjugation excercises. Fortunately, the teacher's a hoot, everybody's so tired that they'll start laughing at the drop of a hat and the sentences are the most hilarious thing I've ever had the pleasure of correcting :'D
Some of my favorites:
Naapurini käyttää foliohattua suojautuakseen ajatustenluvulta, mutta epäonnekseen hän ei ole huomannut totuuskaasua, jota lasken ilmastointikanaviin.
(My neighbor wears a tinhat to protect him/herself from mind-reading. Too bad he/she hasn't noticed the truth serum I keep releasing into his/her ventilation system.) [tricky part: the original literally mentions "truth gas", which I assume means a truth serum in gaseous form] (and no, the original doesn't offer any clue as to whether the neighbor is a man or a woman: the Finnish language has only one personal pronoun, which is gender neutral)
Vihainen saksanpaimenkoira söi Aleksis Kiven kadulle pudonnutta berliininmunkkia.
(An angry German Shepherd ate a donut that had fallen onto the ground on Aleksis Kivi Street.) [tricky part: this is a berliininmunkki] (one of the girls in class went into complete hysterics after she read this sentence - she wanted to know why the poor dog was angry if it was eating something so sweet :'D)
Ensimmäisenä Syksyn sävel -kilpailussa esiintyi Erkki "Evakkoreki" Liikanen - sitten tuli Jouko ja Kosti.
(Erkki "Evakkoreki" Liikanen was the first to perform in the Syksyn sävel song contest. Next up were the duo Jouko and Kosti.) [tricky part: how the crap should I translate "evakkoreki"?! Just explaining it would take me half the entry] (the hilarity inherent in this sentence lies in the "Jouko ja Kosti" part: if you capitalize "Kosti", it's a name, but if you write it with a small initial, it turns into the 3rd person past tense of the verb "kostaa" [to avenge, to take revenge on]. Whew. So, if it's not capitalized, the second sentence turns into "And then in came Jouko and took revenge." :'DD)
Ihmissuden voi tappaa vain yhdellä tavalla: hopealuodilla.
(A werewolf can only be killed in one way: with a silver bullet.) [This one was hilarious mostly because all the other sentences were related to grammar and punctuation in one way or another.]
Hei vain, tämähän on hauskaa!
(Hey, this is actually a lot of fun!) [O rly now?]
In conclusion:
Das Book: Suomen kielioppi (Finnish Grammar)
Some of my favorites:
Naapurini käyttää foliohattua suojautuakseen ajatustenluvulta, mutta epäonnekseen hän ei ole huomannut totuuskaasua, jota lasken ilmastointikanaviin.
(My neighbor wears a tinhat to protect him/herself from mind-reading. Too bad he/she hasn't noticed the truth serum I keep releasing into his/her ventilation system.) [tricky part: the original literally mentions "truth gas", which I assume means a truth serum in gaseous form] (and no, the original doesn't offer any clue as to whether the neighbor is a man or a woman: the Finnish language has only one personal pronoun, which is gender neutral)
Vihainen saksanpaimenkoira söi Aleksis Kiven kadulle pudonnutta berliininmunkkia.
(An angry German Shepherd ate a donut that had fallen onto the ground on Aleksis Kivi Street.) [tricky part: this is a berliininmunkki] (one of the girls in class went into complete hysterics after she read this sentence - she wanted to know why the poor dog was angry if it was eating something so sweet :'D)
Ensimmäisenä Syksyn sävel -kilpailussa esiintyi Erkki "Evakkoreki" Liikanen - sitten tuli Jouko ja Kosti.
(Erkki "Evakkoreki" Liikanen was the first to perform in the Syksyn sävel song contest. Next up were the duo Jouko and Kosti.) [tricky part: how the crap should I translate "evakkoreki"?! Just explaining it would take me half the entry] (the hilarity inherent in this sentence lies in the "Jouko ja Kosti" part: if you capitalize "Kosti", it's a name, but if you write it with a small initial, it turns into the 3rd person past tense of the verb "kostaa" [to avenge, to take revenge on]. Whew. So, if it's not capitalized, the second sentence turns into "And then in came Jouko and took revenge." :'DD)
Ihmissuden voi tappaa vain yhdellä tavalla: hopealuodilla.
(A werewolf can only be killed in one way: with a silver bullet.) [This one was hilarious mostly because all the other sentences were related to grammar and punctuation in one way or another.]
Hei vain, tämähän on hauskaa!
(Hey, this is actually a lot of fun!) [O rly now?]
In conclusion:
Das Book: Suomen kielioppi (Finnish Grammar)