Turtle Story: Surprise Kisses Part 2
*****~*****
The moment Raphael had pulled Leo from the container; Michelangelo had wanted to run to him. He had wanted to throw himself at him and hold him tight, help him stand, kiss him, cry against him; he just wanted to touch him. But Donnie had gently lifted his arm and held him back, offering a sad smile to him before they both looked back to the scene. Don was right of course; he needed to let Raph and Leo have their moment to apologize in that gruff way of theirs - Raph punching him in the shoulder, Leonardo shaking his head disapprovingly even as he smirked - but he still wanted to run over there and throw his arms about him.
The battle was tough - not as tough as fighting Shredder. Nothing would probably beat the battle against the cheese grater in space. But it was tough simply because those immortal statues were statues… and immortal. But it was a good fight. Got the blood pumping anyway.
They were on their way back to the lair, trekking through the tunnels now that the sun was up above their heads past the asphalt and concrete. Michelangelo stuck close to Leo. Short of taking his hand or jumping him, everyone knew he desperately needed Leonardo close for both reassurance and to sooth his fears away. He needed his blue banded brother solely.
Raph and Donnie walked quietly on either side of Splinter, occasionally helping the aging rat along - which was rather ironic if they had stopped to think about it. That same rat had just gone up against demons from another dimension and thoroughly wiped the floor with them; but here they were helping him walk.
Entering the lair after a hard days work was a nice feeling. Splinter smiled and Mikey trailed after Leo like a puppy
Splinter quietly made his way down the stairs, his staff clicking loudly against the concrete of their home. “My sons,” He said suddenly and looked over his shoulder, gazing up at his boys still standing on the stairs above him. “You fought well tonight.” He said, turning slowly and laying both hands atop his cane.
The boys stopped, staring down at their master intently.
“You fought smart and you fought strong; but most importantly, you worked as a team and became one with each other in the midst of battle.” A playful smile touched the old rat’s face as he raised a furry brow slowly and looked directly at his purple banded son, catching his eyes and holding them strongly, “Wouldn’t you agree, Donatello?”
Donnie jerked his back a bit straighter as he stared down at his father, his hands trembling just faintly at his sides as his lips parted and his head tilted in a silent question. He managed to nod once, and was reward with a warmer smile and small bow of his father’s head.
“It is good that my sons are strong and will stand together despite disagreements they may have from time to time.” Another smile played on his lips before he bowed ever so slightly. Splinter raised a brow faintly at Donatello, watching his son bite his lower lip as he looked down at his feet shyly. The elderly rat only smiled before he turned and shuffled across the lair to disappear into his room.
The boys shifted on the stairs, smiling faintly to one another - but now that the battle was over, the awkwardness of their situation jerked at their bellies once again.
Mikey blushed and looked away; poking his toe at the step he was on. Leo frowned and stared straight ahead, his eyes locked on some faraway point on the wall across from them.
Donnie raised his eyes towards Raphael, studying him for a moment. As soon as the purple clad turtle’s courage was finally roused to even speak against the heavy silence, Raph growled, breaking it first as he stomped down the stairs.
“Goin’ ta blow off some steam.” He growled and stormed across the lair, heading for the dojo and his punching bag.
Frowning, Donatello’s shoulders drooped and he stared after his brother longingly.
Michelangelo was the next to rouse them. Smiling up at Leo, Mikey suddenly paused and looked away just as suddenly as he had attempted to smile. His stomach twisted in uncertainty about the entire situation and he felt a prickling at the backs of his eyelids. Hurrying down the stairs with a limp skip in his normally bouncy steps, the orange banded turtle ran from his temptation. Jumping over the couch and immediately immersing himself into a video game, the youngest turtle hid himself away blinking his eyes rapidly to keep the searing heat behind his eyelids.
The brothers were quiet for a few minutes longer. But as the video game’s music began to play, Donnie took a step down before he paused, thinking over something. Turning, he gazed up at Leonardo and fixed him with such a penetrating look, that the eldest had no choice but to be held by that look.
“Talk to him.” Donnie whispered abruptly, his dark eyes holding Leo’s for a moment longer, impressing upon him how gravely important it was that he do as he asked. Leo was the one to look away first, and only then did Don move down the stairs and silently make his way across the lair and down the hall, leaving the two turtles alone.
Leonardo studied the floor, mulling his brother’s words over in his mind. As his stomach flipped and his body trembled, Leo finally gazed over to the bowed and hunched up shoulders of his baby brother and he could do nothing but stand there, frozen on the stairs as though time had stopped him where he stood.
“I never changed my mind.” His voice broke through the music and the metal clashing together in Mikey’s game.
‘Pause’ flashed across the television screen and Michelangelo’s shoulders stiffened though he didn’t turn around.
The shoji doors opened a sliver.
“I didn’t change my mind.” Leo repeated, his voice fading slightly, his eyes locked on his brother’s form upon the sofa.
“Wh-what are you talkin’ about, bro?” Mikey asked shakily, slowly turning around with a fake and scared smile plastered to his face.
Leo could only stare, his hands curling into fists and his warm brown eyes fixed on him with that unwavering gaze of his that made a shiver touch his spine. “I never changed my mind… about us.”
Mikey looked away, a bit dazed and frightened, “But then… why did you...”
“I hadn’t talked to Splinter yet… about us. I wanted to know what would happen to me, and you, if we went against his wishes and continued what we had.” Leo paused, staring at the back of Mikey’s neck as his brows curled, “I wanted to know what I had to offer you. If I was going to be banished, I wanted you to know what you would have to look forward too. A life of endless wandering; or a life of having nothing… no more comic books, no more games; no more of anything that you enjoy.”
Twisting on the couch and kneeling on the cushions, Mikey leaned over the back of the sofa and stared up at him with a frantic look in his eyes. “I don’t are if I live in a cardboard box, dude! If you’re there…” Mikey desperately blurted out only to be interrupted by his big brother’s simple frown.
Leo looked away for the first time since he started the conversation and he shook his head. “But you don’t deserve that. I want to provide for you.” He whispered.
Mikey trembled, slowly crawling over the top of the couch and moving closer to him, “Leo…”
“I’m sorry…” Leo whispered, reaching out for the railing to steady himself.
Rushing up the stairs, Mikey threw his arms about Leo’s waist, clinging to him tightly as he hid his face against his waist - still standing several steps down. “I love you!” he yelled, squeezing his eyes shut and violently shaking. “That’s enough for me! Honest bro!”
Leo smiled weakly but it fell as he laid his free hand atop Mikey’s head, “Yeah… I love you too….”
At that moment, the shoji doors opened fully and Splinter stepped out into the open. His eyes landed on Leo and Mikey and he stared for a moment before a grim frown fell over his features as he calmly laid a hand upon the other resting atop his cane. “Leonardo, I’m very disappointed in you.”
*****~*****
He was in rare form tonight. His movements were fast and precise. Every punch was thrown with all his might, and his arm lay square with his body and the punching bag as his fists connected. White particles of dust flew into the air and scattered from the impacts against the patched together canvas and leather, creating a hazy atmosphere that only reinforced the otherworldly being standing before him.
Donatello’s fingers twitched against the doorjamb as he watched Raphael throw his fists fast and hard as possible with angry grunts and growls rolling deep in his chest. Donnie caught his breath and his shaking hand lifted to press against his belly and attempt to grip at the plates of his plastron. He was suddenly so scared. Raph was so upset. He knew he was hurt from their words earlier; he hadn’t meant to brush him away like that - but Leo had been kidnapped. He had needed Raph to focus on the situation at hand - not something that could wait till they were behind closed doors and they all were locked away and safe once the danger had passed.
“Well? What is it?” Raphael snapped throwing his shoulder into another punch before he turned glowering, fiery eyes onto the purple banded turtle.
Closing his eyes and gripping at his belly once more for courage, Donatello carefully lifted a foot, sliding it past the threshold and slipping himself into the dojo. He clasped his hands together behind him, and he pressed his shell tightly to the brick wall as his head bowed slightly. He was shaking, he realized; and it was a full body tremble as he gazed down at his toes and huddled in on himself.
“Just spit it out. No use tryin’ ta make it all nice and pretty.” Raphael grunted and looked away, throwing another few rough punches into the bag.
Donnie lifted his face, his eyes glassy in unshed tears that trembled precariously before his dark eyes.
Glancing towards his brother and taking in the frightened appearance, Raph’s gut twisted and he looked away, grabbing the punching back to stop it from swaying wildly. “Ya hate me.”
Silence reigned in the lofty room for several long heartbeats. Donnie couldn’t look at him as he shook his head sharply and sniffling softly. “Never.” he whispered, pulling a hand out from behind him so he could quickly brush away the useless tears.
“Then what the shell is it? Huh?” Raphael’s voice cracked as he turned sharply, throwing his fist out at his side to hit the side of the punching bag with his curled fist. “’Cause apparently I ain’t understandin’ what’s goin’ on. If you an’ Mikey have nothin’ goin’ on, then what is it?” He asked, his voice rising the longer he begged.
Donatello’s dark eyes settled upon his brother’s anguished face, as he stood before him, trembling. “I was just trying to help…. Mikey was upset.” He whispered.
Snorting, Raphael shook his head, “That ain’t what I mean.” He said roughly. Fixing his gaze upon his hands, he glared at the wrappings around his fingers and knuckles and began tugging the athletic tape from his skin as though enjoying the sting it brought him. “I want ta know what happened to us.” Raph whispered.
Shrugging ever so faintly, Donnie shifted against the wall, sheepishly shuffling towards him. “We grew up.” He whispered.
Looking away, the red wearing turtle scowled and shook his head, throwing the wadded up tape away from his person and his hands reached out for the punching bag instead as though just needing something to hold onto. He stood that way for several long minutes, gripping tightly at the bag and taking a moment to truly think. “We’re old enough ta make our own choices, then.” He said suddenly, straightening up as though coming to terms with something. Raphael turned away from the punching bag and began stalking towards Donatello. “We’re not kids anymore, Don. We don’t have ta listen to Splinter anymore.”
“That’s why I’m here Raph.” Donnie whispered breathlessly. Keeping his eyes locked on the other turtle was hard - he had to resist his natural urges to back down and avert his eyes. “I want to talk.”
A pained expression settled upon his face. “Why? Why bother talkin’ at all? You’ve been sayin’ the same damn thing for years! Every time I have tried ta talk, you push me away like I ain’t worth talkin’ too! I already know what you’re going to say!”
“No, you don’t.” Don began but Raphael snarled and stomped forward the last few feet that remained between them.
“I do know! I’ve been hearin’ the same damn thing for ten years! And I hate it!” He shoved a finger into Don’s chest, stepping into his bubble. “You’re gonna tell me we ‘can’t’, and you’re gonna tell me to stop as though I’m the only one here who is just as pissed off at the situation we’re in! I know you want me just as bad! Why do ya keep actin’ like you don’t? It’s like you want to be miserable.” He glared poked at his chest again, sidling closer to him. “Well I’m sick of feelin’ like shit every time I look at ya. I want to smell yer coffee breath every morning! I want ta be the one to drag you away from yer computers when you haven’t taken a break all day! I want all those things!” he shouted, against moving forward and forcing Donnie to take a step back, “But yer just as bad as Leo! Ya follow everythin’ Splinter says - but he’s wrong! He’s wrong about us! He’s wrong about Leo and Mikey! He doesn’t have the right to tell us not to feel like this!” He shouted and stepped forward again, forcing Donatello back another step.
“Raphie…”
“Don’t start!” Raph threw his hand out, slicing at the air to silence him. “You roll over way to easy for him. Well I’m sick of it! I’m tired of being told I’m wrong, and I’m tired of bein’ told it’s for our own good; because it’s not!”
Raphael stepped forward again and Donnie stumbled back the way he came. The fire in Raphael’s eyes grew and caused his stomach to flip and his heart to jump into his mouth.
“You know what, Don? I’m so completely sick of all these games we play. I really don’t think you have any idea how hard it’s been the last ten years lookin’ in on ya with no way of joinin’ you. I’ve often wondered if Splinter was right - that it was just a kid-thing and that it was wrong to love each other like that.
“But then I watch ya do stuff; like, make coffee in the mornin’, lookin’ all tired and out of it from another late-night in the lab; or like, in a battle when you do stupid stuff like spinnin’ around on your bo like one of them actors in a movie you saw. You’re strong, Donnie, Leo and I both see it; you could do better in trainin’, sure; but you’re confident and it disarms everyone around ya. I only watch over you ‘cause I worry. And then there are times like these,” He hissed, stepping into his space and backing him up further till Don’s shell hit the wall and a gasp jumped down the purple clad turtle’s throat, “Lookin’ all shy, uncertain.” He whispered, bowing his head towards him, his eyes intense as he focused solely on him. “You’re so damn determined ta say what you came ta say, that no matter what I do or say, you’re stayin’ till the end.”
Don shivered leaning his head back as Raphael slapped his hand against the wall next to his head and leaned down the vague height difference to stare him directly in the eye while still towering over him. “I’m so damn frustrated with ya. You drive me crazy with everythin’ ya do. You work in that lab day and night, you barely eat, and when you do, it’s only ‘cause Splinter tells you too, or Mikey brings ya stuff. All yer energy and all yer focus goes into inanimate objects, and I’m startin’ ta wish I was part cyborg or something - at least then you would touch me.” His voice lowered another decibel, becoming rough and rolling across the non-existent distance Donatello suddenly found between them.
Grazing his eyes down Donnie’s body quickly, Raphael flicked his eyes up once more and locked his gaze with the purple clad turtle he was leaning heavily into. Shifting against him, Raph raised his arm to rest his elbow upon the wall on the opposite side of Don’s head and effectively trapping him in place. “You remember that first year Leo was gone?” He asked, raising a brow slowly, “It was almost two weeks before the anniversary of him leavin’; and then matin’ season hit us?”
Donatello blushed and peeked away shyly, but his eyes settled upon Raphael’s shoulder and he struggled to keep his hands to himself. “Yes…” He breathed.
A grin curled over Raph’s face. “Ya remember how you just lookin’ at me for the next month had me runnin’ off ta the shower?” At the faint nod and shy look redirected his way, Raphael leaned in, breathing across his ear. “I wanted you so bad, Donnie-boy. You have no idea how much I wanted ta sneak into yer room at night and ravage ya. I wanted ta push ya down or flip ya over every time I saw you. But knowin’ you didn’t want me killed me.” He hissed.
Don trembled as he remembered. His body had been on fire during that time - their first real mating season that wasn’t induced because Leo had gone first. All they had to do at the time was glance at each other before those bursts of hormones took over their bodies and they were forced to hide away in their rooms or in the shower to take care of the constantly growing, and hard, problem.
“I wouldn’t have turned you away…” Donatello trembled, wide-eyed. “I wanted you just as badly.” He admitted in a whisper.
Surprise and even a little bit of shock flittered across Raphael’s face at the revelation, but a hard, spiteful look soon replaced the set of his jaw. “Why didn’t ya bother tellin’ me? Shell, Donnie..!” he shouted, stepping away from his brother as he stared down at him in a mixture of pain and betrayal. “You coulda given’ me a sign or a hint or… anything!” his hands flew out at his sides, his fingers curling into fists, and his face contorted as he stared at him.
Anguish advanced upon Donatello, twisting his face up as he pressed his hands more tightly against his plastron. “It was the first time either of us had gone through something that intense! We wouldn’t have known what to do…”
“You think yer the only one who does research around here?” Raph snarled and once again pushed into Don’s personal space. He smirked at the wary look his younger brother was giving him and that only encouraged him to dip his head the vague two inches. “I would have known what ta do. I’ve had lube hidden away in my room since I was fifteen.”
Flushing a near purple against his olive skin from the abrupt confession, Donatello shyly nodded only to tremble, “Raph, I was scared. Could you blame me?”
Glaring, Raph lifted his face slowly, “The real question there is, who were you afraid of more? Me, or Splinter?”
A defeated expression settled upon him and Don could only stare at him.
“Thought so. You even let him control ya when you’re out of yer mind.” Disgusted, Raph pushed away from the wall - finally releasing Donnie from between his arms and he turned his back on him.
“Raphie!”
“What? He snarled, turning about sharply. “Are you going to beg me not to go or somethin’? Well there ain’t really anywhere for me to go! Maybe it is my turn to leave and travel! It’s not like it would interrupt anythin’ important. Leo’s got his leadership crap to do, Mikey’s goal in life is to have fun, and you…” he paused gritting his teeth together before he continued. “You just sit back there in the lab, doin’ your little telephone thing and hidin’. I hate you bein’ back there, and I hate you talkin’ to those bastards on the phone! You shouldn’t have to take that shit from them! You’re the one doing a service for them, and they treat you like scum! Stand up for yourself damnit!” He growled, pounding a fist against the wall at his side. “And I especially hate you ignoring me!” he declared, his eyes widening as he panted; and in that moment, they both realized what part of the problem was.
Surging forward, Donatello wrapped his arms about the red clad turtle’s neck and forced a kiss onto his lips. Raphael stumbled backwards a few steps before he caught himself by planting a hand to the wall. Returning the kiss heavily with desperation and eagerness, Raph managed to steady himself and he wrapped an arm about Don’s neck while his free hand groped his thigh. He turned quickly, shoving Donnie against the bricks of the wall to his right, and he shuddered as he heard Donatello’s shell scraping against the stones roughly as he rung a moan from the quiet turtle’s lips. Pressing closer to him as he stroked his leg, Raphael rubbed their lower plastron’s together rumbling in delight as Don urged the kiss deeper.
Donnie quickly parted his legs and allowed himself to be lifted from the floor, being drawn up closer to his brother’s body and he eagerly churred in delight. Gripping tightly to Raphael’s shoulders, Donatello slid his thighs up along Raph’s sides and then around his waist.
Pulling his lips away to kiss the side of Don’s mouth, Raphael shuddered as Donatello’s thighs rubbed slowly across the delicate skin between shell and plastron. He held onto him tightly, again planting a hand upon the wall by Donnie’s head as is other hand slid up from his knee to his hip in a slow lingering touch so he could drink in the feel of him surrounding him.
The kisses grew more delicate and Raphael’s lips began to flutter across Donatello’s face. Heavy breathes passed between them. Donnie tightened his arms and tugged Raph’s face closer once again and he pressed an insistent kiss to his mouth, shivering as their tongues momentarily brushed together.
“Raphie…” Finally giving in, Don lowered his eyes, his fists gripping tightly at his shoulders. “I didn’t mean too…”
Snorting, Raphael pulled his lips away and he looked away, bowing his head, “Yeah ya did. You were makin’ sure to follow Splinter’s orders.” He mumbled, looking down at Donnie’s collarbone
Donatello bit his lower lip to keep it from trembling and setting off a chain reaction. The silence that settled on them helped. Don reined his emotions in and forced himself to analyze himself for a change. “I was scared.” He admitted. “I was scared of… of so much. I just wanted you; but I couldn’t. I was scared Splinter would send you away…”
“To Japan?” Raph asked weakly.
Donnie nodded and sighed, “Yeah.” Slowly lifting his eyes, Don considered his brother, his dark eyes reflecting the trembling and emotional turmoil he felt inside. “I… I thought that just by having you near, it would be enough.”
Raphael shifted and averted his eyes. “…Yeah, I know what ya mean.” He admitted in a whisper. “It is… but it ain’t all at the same time.”
Nodding in agreement, Donatello gently tightened his hold about his neck. “I… I want to tell you things; and not be afraid anymore. I want…” A blush blossomed across his cheeks and down along his beak as he reached a shaking hand out, delicately wrapping it around Raphael’s wrist that rested near his neck. “I want to touch you, and not be scared all the time of being punished for it.”
It was Raph’s turn to press a sudden and sharp kiss to Donatello’s beak, pulling him closer and exploring his mouth with a desperate and determined tongue. Donnie returned the kiss, his fingers digging into his shoulder as he arched his back and melted into the kiss. When they broke apart with soft pants and a light nuzzle against Don’s neck, the two began to relax, enjoying the delicate touches. “I’ve missed you.” Raphael whispered, kissing the corner of his mouth then down to his neck were he hid his face. He reached for Don’s face and cupped his cheek, holding him in place as he shivered.
“I’ve missed you too.” Donnie sniffled and clung to him, his fingers digging into his carapace while his legs tightened all the tighter around him.
Raph lost feeling in his knees and he trembled, beginning to drag the two of them to the ground and scraping Don’s shell against the bricks. He finally dropped to his knees, Don cradled upon his lap with a hand clawing at the wall above their heads.
“You won’t run away if I say I love you?”
“Not this time.” Donatello whispered, rubbing Raphael’s shoulders slowly as he felt the larger turtle shudder. Soft kisses touched both his throat and shoulder before Raph lifted his head.
Inhaling slowly, Raphael peeked away to wipe his cheek free of tears on the side of his own arm before he sighed, “Really?”
Donnie pressed a delicate and chaste kiss to his lips and he offered a small smile to the watery amber that winked at him in the center of a deep red sea. “I love you too.” He breathed, and then very carefully untied Raph’s mask, pulling it from his face. He wiped gently at his cheeks with the tail ends of the mask before he dropped it to the side and then removed his own, blushing faintly. “There are still things we need to address and fix… but… no more hiding, and no more running away. I Promise.”
Raphael flushed lightly and ran his thumb along Don’s cheek. He smiled when the olive colored turtle leaned into his touch and Raph bowed closer, lightly kissing him between the dark, haunting eyes upon his brow, “You really promise? No changin’ yer mind tomorrow mornin’?”
He leaned close and pressed a few kisses here and there across his face, his fingertips once again trailing along his shoulders and across the back of his neck. “I won’t change my mind.” Donatello smiled shyly. “I… I want you to stay with me tonight.” He whispered, blushing deeply as he quickly averted his eyes and fidgeted against him.
A faint blush touched Raph’s cheeks as well, but a sly, rather smug smirk curled over his beak. “Oh? Lil’ Donnie getting naughty thoughts already?”
Donatello squirmed and shook his head quickly, “No! I… just… like when we were little. I… I just want you there in my bed. I want to feel you close to me.”
“I really don’t think we can get any closer, Donnie-boy.” Raphael rumbled, pulling his hand away from the wall so he could slowly run his hand along his thigh, groping at his leg in delight.
“I was just offering…”
“Okay.” Raph murmured, kissing his neck and cheeks quickly, “I’ll stay with ya tonight.” An embarrassed smile spread over Don’s face and Raphael felt his heart warm and his insides curl upon seeing that happy look aimed towards him. He was beautiful like this; all flushed and shy, his fingers moving across every inch of him he could reach simply out of nervousness. He was so cute… and he was his.
“What changed your mind?” Raphael asked suddenly, his thumb rubbing his cheek lightly.
Donatello paused as he considered his words, his head tilting into his touch. “It was something Splinter said a while ago... and I didn’t want to wait anymore.”
Raph chuckled, finding that rather ironic, but he wasn’t going to complain, not with that smile and a lap full of Donnie pressed against him. “About damn time.” He chuckled and leaned forward, kissing him hard and deep. He had a lot of kisses to make up for; and the little chur of delight from Donnie told him he was going to enjoy every minute of it.
*****~*****
Mikey kissing Don is so cute XD and funny. At least from my point of view in this story. Heehee. He’s always looking for ways to lighten the mood.
And the part about Leonardo reflecting… it almost didn’t make it in here. It felt slow and not very useful to me (Still does) but I needed it to set a timeline. And it was also... eh… sweet in a way. So I still have mixed feelings about that particular small section. (I’m glad it was short cause if it were longer it probably would have been kicked out completely, but like I said, it establishes a timeline…. Right before Leo storms out of the lair to find Raph and instead finds Nightwatcher!Raph.) bleh… I’d totally understand if ya’ll hated that part. :/ but I guess because Leo IS such a private person, it sorta fits that everything he thinks or does has always been away from his brothers so he can think things over in leader-mode. *shrugs*
Then later on, the part where Michelangelo listens in on Raph talking to Splinter - I think I watched that part of the movie about a thousand times, JUST to see how early Mikey showed up and when he disappeared. I mean, I even paused it to study the hallway to get an idea for the layout and how he could have snuck up. I’m such a geek! XD anyway, I like how it turned out cause we all saw that part from Raph and Splinter’s POV, but Mikey WAS there, he heard pretty much everything, and he DID disappear pretty fast before the end of their talk was over. So I hope that part seemed believable.
(and seriously, if you watch the part where Donnie is checking Raph over after they head to April’s and they find the stone-throwing star thingy in his shell, Raph just lays there watching him; then as soon as Leo heads over, he slaps his hand away and suddenly seems all fine XD I found it cute.)
and then here is the happy I promised you all :D and yes, there is more to come! (I just need to write more of it and edit it, and get the picture colored so I can upload it to my lj site... and so on . a lot of work). I hope this part was well worth the wait:) though I do think Raph is a lil’ out of char at the end…. Too sweet and all… but... but... it’s just so sweet having him all lovey-dovey! ;_; I had to keep it in! anyway, I hope you enjoyed :D
~Melissa the Damgel
The moment Raphael had pulled Leo from the container; Michelangelo had wanted to run to him. He had wanted to throw himself at him and hold him tight, help him stand, kiss him, cry against him; he just wanted to touch him. But Donnie had gently lifted his arm and held him back, offering a sad smile to him before they both looked back to the scene. Don was right of course; he needed to let Raph and Leo have their moment to apologize in that gruff way of theirs - Raph punching him in the shoulder, Leonardo shaking his head disapprovingly even as he smirked - but he still wanted to run over there and throw his arms about him.
The battle was tough - not as tough as fighting Shredder. Nothing would probably beat the battle against the cheese grater in space. But it was tough simply because those immortal statues were statues… and immortal. But it was a good fight. Got the blood pumping anyway.
They were on their way back to the lair, trekking through the tunnels now that the sun was up above their heads past the asphalt and concrete. Michelangelo stuck close to Leo. Short of taking his hand or jumping him, everyone knew he desperately needed Leonardo close for both reassurance and to sooth his fears away. He needed his blue banded brother solely.
Raph and Donnie walked quietly on either side of Splinter, occasionally helping the aging rat along - which was rather ironic if they had stopped to think about it. That same rat had just gone up against demons from another dimension and thoroughly wiped the floor with them; but here they were helping him walk.
Entering the lair after a hard days work was a nice feeling. Splinter smiled and Mikey trailed after Leo like a puppy
Splinter quietly made his way down the stairs, his staff clicking loudly against the concrete of their home. “My sons,” He said suddenly and looked over his shoulder, gazing up at his boys still standing on the stairs above him. “You fought well tonight.” He said, turning slowly and laying both hands atop his cane.
The boys stopped, staring down at their master intently.
“You fought smart and you fought strong; but most importantly, you worked as a team and became one with each other in the midst of battle.” A playful smile touched the old rat’s face as he raised a furry brow slowly and looked directly at his purple banded son, catching his eyes and holding them strongly, “Wouldn’t you agree, Donatello?”
Donnie jerked his back a bit straighter as he stared down at his father, his hands trembling just faintly at his sides as his lips parted and his head tilted in a silent question. He managed to nod once, and was reward with a warmer smile and small bow of his father’s head.
“It is good that my sons are strong and will stand together despite disagreements they may have from time to time.” Another smile played on his lips before he bowed ever so slightly. Splinter raised a brow faintly at Donatello, watching his son bite his lower lip as he looked down at his feet shyly. The elderly rat only smiled before he turned and shuffled across the lair to disappear into his room.
The boys shifted on the stairs, smiling faintly to one another - but now that the battle was over, the awkwardness of their situation jerked at their bellies once again.
Mikey blushed and looked away; poking his toe at the step he was on. Leo frowned and stared straight ahead, his eyes locked on some faraway point on the wall across from them.
Donnie raised his eyes towards Raphael, studying him for a moment. As soon as the purple clad turtle’s courage was finally roused to even speak against the heavy silence, Raph growled, breaking it first as he stomped down the stairs.
“Goin’ ta blow off some steam.” He growled and stormed across the lair, heading for the dojo and his punching bag.
Frowning, Donatello’s shoulders drooped and he stared after his brother longingly.
Michelangelo was the next to rouse them. Smiling up at Leo, Mikey suddenly paused and looked away just as suddenly as he had attempted to smile. His stomach twisted in uncertainty about the entire situation and he felt a prickling at the backs of his eyelids. Hurrying down the stairs with a limp skip in his normally bouncy steps, the orange banded turtle ran from his temptation. Jumping over the couch and immediately immersing himself into a video game, the youngest turtle hid himself away blinking his eyes rapidly to keep the searing heat behind his eyelids.
The brothers were quiet for a few minutes longer. But as the video game’s music began to play, Donnie took a step down before he paused, thinking over something. Turning, he gazed up at Leonardo and fixed him with such a penetrating look, that the eldest had no choice but to be held by that look.
“Talk to him.” Donnie whispered abruptly, his dark eyes holding Leo’s for a moment longer, impressing upon him how gravely important it was that he do as he asked. Leo was the one to look away first, and only then did Don move down the stairs and silently make his way across the lair and down the hall, leaving the two turtles alone.
Leonardo studied the floor, mulling his brother’s words over in his mind. As his stomach flipped and his body trembled, Leo finally gazed over to the bowed and hunched up shoulders of his baby brother and he could do nothing but stand there, frozen on the stairs as though time had stopped him where he stood.
“I never changed my mind.” His voice broke through the music and the metal clashing together in Mikey’s game.
‘Pause’ flashed across the television screen and Michelangelo’s shoulders stiffened though he didn’t turn around.
The shoji doors opened a sliver.
“I didn’t change my mind.” Leo repeated, his voice fading slightly, his eyes locked on his brother’s form upon the sofa.
“Wh-what are you talkin’ about, bro?” Mikey asked shakily, slowly turning around with a fake and scared smile plastered to his face.
Leo could only stare, his hands curling into fists and his warm brown eyes fixed on him with that unwavering gaze of his that made a shiver touch his spine. “I never changed my mind… about us.”
Mikey looked away, a bit dazed and frightened, “But then… why did you...”
“I hadn’t talked to Splinter yet… about us. I wanted to know what would happen to me, and you, if we went against his wishes and continued what we had.” Leo paused, staring at the back of Mikey’s neck as his brows curled, “I wanted to know what I had to offer you. If I was going to be banished, I wanted you to know what you would have to look forward too. A life of endless wandering; or a life of having nothing… no more comic books, no more games; no more of anything that you enjoy.”
Twisting on the couch and kneeling on the cushions, Mikey leaned over the back of the sofa and stared up at him with a frantic look in his eyes. “I don’t are if I live in a cardboard box, dude! If you’re there…” Mikey desperately blurted out only to be interrupted by his big brother’s simple frown.
Leo looked away for the first time since he started the conversation and he shook his head. “But you don’t deserve that. I want to provide for you.” He whispered.
Mikey trembled, slowly crawling over the top of the couch and moving closer to him, “Leo…”
“I’m sorry…” Leo whispered, reaching out for the railing to steady himself.
Rushing up the stairs, Mikey threw his arms about Leo’s waist, clinging to him tightly as he hid his face against his waist - still standing several steps down. “I love you!” he yelled, squeezing his eyes shut and violently shaking. “That’s enough for me! Honest bro!”
Leo smiled weakly but it fell as he laid his free hand atop Mikey’s head, “Yeah… I love you too….”
At that moment, the shoji doors opened fully and Splinter stepped out into the open. His eyes landed on Leo and Mikey and he stared for a moment before a grim frown fell over his features as he calmly laid a hand upon the other resting atop his cane. “Leonardo, I’m very disappointed in you.”
*****~*****
He was in rare form tonight. His movements were fast and precise. Every punch was thrown with all his might, and his arm lay square with his body and the punching bag as his fists connected. White particles of dust flew into the air and scattered from the impacts against the patched together canvas and leather, creating a hazy atmosphere that only reinforced the otherworldly being standing before him.
Donatello’s fingers twitched against the doorjamb as he watched Raphael throw his fists fast and hard as possible with angry grunts and growls rolling deep in his chest. Donnie caught his breath and his shaking hand lifted to press against his belly and attempt to grip at the plates of his plastron. He was suddenly so scared. Raph was so upset. He knew he was hurt from their words earlier; he hadn’t meant to brush him away like that - but Leo had been kidnapped. He had needed Raph to focus on the situation at hand - not something that could wait till they were behind closed doors and they all were locked away and safe once the danger had passed.
“Well? What is it?” Raphael snapped throwing his shoulder into another punch before he turned glowering, fiery eyes onto the purple banded turtle.
Closing his eyes and gripping at his belly once more for courage, Donatello carefully lifted a foot, sliding it past the threshold and slipping himself into the dojo. He clasped his hands together behind him, and he pressed his shell tightly to the brick wall as his head bowed slightly. He was shaking, he realized; and it was a full body tremble as he gazed down at his toes and huddled in on himself.
“Just spit it out. No use tryin’ ta make it all nice and pretty.” Raphael grunted and looked away, throwing another few rough punches into the bag.
Donnie lifted his face, his eyes glassy in unshed tears that trembled precariously before his dark eyes.
Glancing towards his brother and taking in the frightened appearance, Raph’s gut twisted and he looked away, grabbing the punching back to stop it from swaying wildly. “Ya hate me.”
Silence reigned in the lofty room for several long heartbeats. Donnie couldn’t look at him as he shook his head sharply and sniffling softly. “Never.” he whispered, pulling a hand out from behind him so he could quickly brush away the useless tears.
“Then what the shell is it? Huh?” Raphael’s voice cracked as he turned sharply, throwing his fist out at his side to hit the side of the punching bag with his curled fist. “’Cause apparently I ain’t understandin’ what’s goin’ on. If you an’ Mikey have nothin’ goin’ on, then what is it?” He asked, his voice rising the longer he begged.
Donatello’s dark eyes settled upon his brother’s anguished face, as he stood before him, trembling. “I was just trying to help…. Mikey was upset.” He whispered.
Snorting, Raphael shook his head, “That ain’t what I mean.” He said roughly. Fixing his gaze upon his hands, he glared at the wrappings around his fingers and knuckles and began tugging the athletic tape from his skin as though enjoying the sting it brought him. “I want ta know what happened to us.” Raph whispered.
Shrugging ever so faintly, Donnie shifted against the wall, sheepishly shuffling towards him. “We grew up.” He whispered.
Looking away, the red wearing turtle scowled and shook his head, throwing the wadded up tape away from his person and his hands reached out for the punching bag instead as though just needing something to hold onto. He stood that way for several long minutes, gripping tightly at the bag and taking a moment to truly think. “We’re old enough ta make our own choices, then.” He said suddenly, straightening up as though coming to terms with something. Raphael turned away from the punching bag and began stalking towards Donatello. “We’re not kids anymore, Don. We don’t have ta listen to Splinter anymore.”
“That’s why I’m here Raph.” Donnie whispered breathlessly. Keeping his eyes locked on the other turtle was hard - he had to resist his natural urges to back down and avert his eyes. “I want to talk.”
A pained expression settled upon his face. “Why? Why bother talkin’ at all? You’ve been sayin’ the same damn thing for years! Every time I have tried ta talk, you push me away like I ain’t worth talkin’ too! I already know what you’re going to say!”
“No, you don’t.” Don began but Raphael snarled and stomped forward the last few feet that remained between them.
“I do know! I’ve been hearin’ the same damn thing for ten years! And I hate it!” He shoved a finger into Don’s chest, stepping into his bubble. “You’re gonna tell me we ‘can’t’, and you’re gonna tell me to stop as though I’m the only one here who is just as pissed off at the situation we’re in! I know you want me just as bad! Why do ya keep actin’ like you don’t? It’s like you want to be miserable.” He glared poked at his chest again, sidling closer to him. “Well I’m sick of feelin’ like shit every time I look at ya. I want to smell yer coffee breath every morning! I want ta be the one to drag you away from yer computers when you haven’t taken a break all day! I want all those things!” he shouted, against moving forward and forcing Donnie to take a step back, “But yer just as bad as Leo! Ya follow everythin’ Splinter says - but he’s wrong! He’s wrong about us! He’s wrong about Leo and Mikey! He doesn’t have the right to tell us not to feel like this!” He shouted and stepped forward again, forcing Donatello back another step.
“Raphie…”
“Don’t start!” Raph threw his hand out, slicing at the air to silence him. “You roll over way to easy for him. Well I’m sick of it! I’m tired of being told I’m wrong, and I’m tired of bein’ told it’s for our own good; because it’s not!”
Raphael stepped forward again and Donnie stumbled back the way he came. The fire in Raphael’s eyes grew and caused his stomach to flip and his heart to jump into his mouth.
“You know what, Don? I’m so completely sick of all these games we play. I really don’t think you have any idea how hard it’s been the last ten years lookin’ in on ya with no way of joinin’ you. I’ve often wondered if Splinter was right - that it was just a kid-thing and that it was wrong to love each other like that.
“But then I watch ya do stuff; like, make coffee in the mornin’, lookin’ all tired and out of it from another late-night in the lab; or like, in a battle when you do stupid stuff like spinnin’ around on your bo like one of them actors in a movie you saw. You’re strong, Donnie, Leo and I both see it; you could do better in trainin’, sure; but you’re confident and it disarms everyone around ya. I only watch over you ‘cause I worry. And then there are times like these,” He hissed, stepping into his space and backing him up further till Don’s shell hit the wall and a gasp jumped down the purple clad turtle’s throat, “Lookin’ all shy, uncertain.” He whispered, bowing his head towards him, his eyes intense as he focused solely on him. “You’re so damn determined ta say what you came ta say, that no matter what I do or say, you’re stayin’ till the end.”
Don shivered leaning his head back as Raphael slapped his hand against the wall next to his head and leaned down the vague height difference to stare him directly in the eye while still towering over him. “I’m so damn frustrated with ya. You drive me crazy with everythin’ ya do. You work in that lab day and night, you barely eat, and when you do, it’s only ‘cause Splinter tells you too, or Mikey brings ya stuff. All yer energy and all yer focus goes into inanimate objects, and I’m startin’ ta wish I was part cyborg or something - at least then you would touch me.” His voice lowered another decibel, becoming rough and rolling across the non-existent distance Donatello suddenly found between them.
Grazing his eyes down Donnie’s body quickly, Raphael flicked his eyes up once more and locked his gaze with the purple clad turtle he was leaning heavily into. Shifting against him, Raph raised his arm to rest his elbow upon the wall on the opposite side of Don’s head and effectively trapping him in place. “You remember that first year Leo was gone?” He asked, raising a brow slowly, “It was almost two weeks before the anniversary of him leavin’; and then matin’ season hit us?”
Donatello blushed and peeked away shyly, but his eyes settled upon Raphael’s shoulder and he struggled to keep his hands to himself. “Yes…” He breathed.
A grin curled over Raph’s face. “Ya remember how you just lookin’ at me for the next month had me runnin’ off ta the shower?” At the faint nod and shy look redirected his way, Raphael leaned in, breathing across his ear. “I wanted you so bad, Donnie-boy. You have no idea how much I wanted ta sneak into yer room at night and ravage ya. I wanted ta push ya down or flip ya over every time I saw you. But knowin’ you didn’t want me killed me.” He hissed.
Don trembled as he remembered. His body had been on fire during that time - their first real mating season that wasn’t induced because Leo had gone first. All they had to do at the time was glance at each other before those bursts of hormones took over their bodies and they were forced to hide away in their rooms or in the shower to take care of the constantly growing, and hard, problem.
“I wouldn’t have turned you away…” Donatello trembled, wide-eyed. “I wanted you just as badly.” He admitted in a whisper.
Surprise and even a little bit of shock flittered across Raphael’s face at the revelation, but a hard, spiteful look soon replaced the set of his jaw. “Why didn’t ya bother tellin’ me? Shell, Donnie..!” he shouted, stepping away from his brother as he stared down at him in a mixture of pain and betrayal. “You coulda given’ me a sign or a hint or… anything!” his hands flew out at his sides, his fingers curling into fists, and his face contorted as he stared at him.
Anguish advanced upon Donatello, twisting his face up as he pressed his hands more tightly against his plastron. “It was the first time either of us had gone through something that intense! We wouldn’t have known what to do…”
“You think yer the only one who does research around here?” Raph snarled and once again pushed into Don’s personal space. He smirked at the wary look his younger brother was giving him and that only encouraged him to dip his head the vague two inches. “I would have known what ta do. I’ve had lube hidden away in my room since I was fifteen.”
Flushing a near purple against his olive skin from the abrupt confession, Donatello shyly nodded only to tremble, “Raph, I was scared. Could you blame me?”
Glaring, Raph lifted his face slowly, “The real question there is, who were you afraid of more? Me, or Splinter?”
A defeated expression settled upon him and Don could only stare at him.
“Thought so. You even let him control ya when you’re out of yer mind.” Disgusted, Raph pushed away from the wall - finally releasing Donnie from between his arms and he turned his back on him.
“Raphie!”
“What? He snarled, turning about sharply. “Are you going to beg me not to go or somethin’? Well there ain’t really anywhere for me to go! Maybe it is my turn to leave and travel! It’s not like it would interrupt anythin’ important. Leo’s got his leadership crap to do, Mikey’s goal in life is to have fun, and you…” he paused gritting his teeth together before he continued. “You just sit back there in the lab, doin’ your little telephone thing and hidin’. I hate you bein’ back there, and I hate you talkin’ to those bastards on the phone! You shouldn’t have to take that shit from them! You’re the one doing a service for them, and they treat you like scum! Stand up for yourself damnit!” He growled, pounding a fist against the wall at his side. “And I especially hate you ignoring me!” he declared, his eyes widening as he panted; and in that moment, they both realized what part of the problem was.
Surging forward, Donatello wrapped his arms about the red clad turtle’s neck and forced a kiss onto his lips. Raphael stumbled backwards a few steps before he caught himself by planting a hand to the wall. Returning the kiss heavily with desperation and eagerness, Raph managed to steady himself and he wrapped an arm about Don’s neck while his free hand groped his thigh. He turned quickly, shoving Donnie against the bricks of the wall to his right, and he shuddered as he heard Donatello’s shell scraping against the stones roughly as he rung a moan from the quiet turtle’s lips. Pressing closer to him as he stroked his leg, Raphael rubbed their lower plastron’s together rumbling in delight as Don urged the kiss deeper.
Donnie quickly parted his legs and allowed himself to be lifted from the floor, being drawn up closer to his brother’s body and he eagerly churred in delight. Gripping tightly to Raphael’s shoulders, Donatello slid his thighs up along Raph’s sides and then around his waist.
Pulling his lips away to kiss the side of Don’s mouth, Raphael shuddered as Donatello’s thighs rubbed slowly across the delicate skin between shell and plastron. He held onto him tightly, again planting a hand upon the wall by Donnie’s head as is other hand slid up from his knee to his hip in a slow lingering touch so he could drink in the feel of him surrounding him.
The kisses grew more delicate and Raphael’s lips began to flutter across Donatello’s face. Heavy breathes passed between them. Donnie tightened his arms and tugged Raph’s face closer once again and he pressed an insistent kiss to his mouth, shivering as their tongues momentarily brushed together.
“Raphie…” Finally giving in, Don lowered his eyes, his fists gripping tightly at his shoulders. “I didn’t mean too…”
Snorting, Raphael pulled his lips away and he looked away, bowing his head, “Yeah ya did. You were makin’ sure to follow Splinter’s orders.” He mumbled, looking down at Donnie’s collarbone
Donatello bit his lower lip to keep it from trembling and setting off a chain reaction. The silence that settled on them helped. Don reined his emotions in and forced himself to analyze himself for a change. “I was scared.” He admitted. “I was scared of… of so much. I just wanted you; but I couldn’t. I was scared Splinter would send you away…”
“To Japan?” Raph asked weakly.
Donnie nodded and sighed, “Yeah.” Slowly lifting his eyes, Don considered his brother, his dark eyes reflecting the trembling and emotional turmoil he felt inside. “I… I thought that just by having you near, it would be enough.”
Raphael shifted and averted his eyes. “…Yeah, I know what ya mean.” He admitted in a whisper. “It is… but it ain’t all at the same time.”
Nodding in agreement, Donatello gently tightened his hold about his neck. “I… I want to tell you things; and not be afraid anymore. I want…” A blush blossomed across his cheeks and down along his beak as he reached a shaking hand out, delicately wrapping it around Raphael’s wrist that rested near his neck. “I want to touch you, and not be scared all the time of being punished for it.”
It was Raph’s turn to press a sudden and sharp kiss to Donatello’s beak, pulling him closer and exploring his mouth with a desperate and determined tongue. Donnie returned the kiss, his fingers digging into his shoulder as he arched his back and melted into the kiss. When they broke apart with soft pants and a light nuzzle against Don’s neck, the two began to relax, enjoying the delicate touches. “I’ve missed you.” Raphael whispered, kissing the corner of his mouth then down to his neck were he hid his face. He reached for Don’s face and cupped his cheek, holding him in place as he shivered.
“I’ve missed you too.” Donnie sniffled and clung to him, his fingers digging into his carapace while his legs tightened all the tighter around him.
Raph lost feeling in his knees and he trembled, beginning to drag the two of them to the ground and scraping Don’s shell against the bricks. He finally dropped to his knees, Don cradled upon his lap with a hand clawing at the wall above their heads.
“You won’t run away if I say I love you?”
“Not this time.” Donatello whispered, rubbing Raphael’s shoulders slowly as he felt the larger turtle shudder. Soft kisses touched both his throat and shoulder before Raph lifted his head.
Inhaling slowly, Raphael peeked away to wipe his cheek free of tears on the side of his own arm before he sighed, “Really?”
Donnie pressed a delicate and chaste kiss to his lips and he offered a small smile to the watery amber that winked at him in the center of a deep red sea. “I love you too.” He breathed, and then very carefully untied Raph’s mask, pulling it from his face. He wiped gently at his cheeks with the tail ends of the mask before he dropped it to the side and then removed his own, blushing faintly. “There are still things we need to address and fix… but… no more hiding, and no more running away. I Promise.”
Raphael flushed lightly and ran his thumb along Don’s cheek. He smiled when the olive colored turtle leaned into his touch and Raph bowed closer, lightly kissing him between the dark, haunting eyes upon his brow, “You really promise? No changin’ yer mind tomorrow mornin’?”
He leaned close and pressed a few kisses here and there across his face, his fingertips once again trailing along his shoulders and across the back of his neck. “I won’t change my mind.” Donatello smiled shyly. “I… I want you to stay with me tonight.” He whispered, blushing deeply as he quickly averted his eyes and fidgeted against him.
A faint blush touched Raph’s cheeks as well, but a sly, rather smug smirk curled over his beak. “Oh? Lil’ Donnie getting naughty thoughts already?”
Donatello squirmed and shook his head quickly, “No! I… just… like when we were little. I… I just want you there in my bed. I want to feel you close to me.”
“I really don’t think we can get any closer, Donnie-boy.” Raphael rumbled, pulling his hand away from the wall so he could slowly run his hand along his thigh, groping at his leg in delight.
“I was just offering…”
“Okay.” Raph murmured, kissing his neck and cheeks quickly, “I’ll stay with ya tonight.” An embarrassed smile spread over Don’s face and Raphael felt his heart warm and his insides curl upon seeing that happy look aimed towards him. He was beautiful like this; all flushed and shy, his fingers moving across every inch of him he could reach simply out of nervousness. He was so cute… and he was his.
“What changed your mind?” Raphael asked suddenly, his thumb rubbing his cheek lightly.
Donatello paused as he considered his words, his head tilting into his touch. “It was something Splinter said a while ago... and I didn’t want to wait anymore.”
Raph chuckled, finding that rather ironic, but he wasn’t going to complain, not with that smile and a lap full of Donnie pressed against him. “About damn time.” He chuckled and leaned forward, kissing him hard and deep. He had a lot of kisses to make up for; and the little chur of delight from Donnie told him he was going to enjoy every minute of it.
*****~*****
Mikey kissing Don is so cute XD and funny. At least from my point of view in this story. Heehee. He’s always looking for ways to lighten the mood.
And the part about Leonardo reflecting… it almost didn’t make it in here. It felt slow and not very useful to me (Still does) but I needed it to set a timeline. And it was also... eh… sweet in a way. So I still have mixed feelings about that particular small section. (I’m glad it was short cause if it were longer it probably would have been kicked out completely, but like I said, it establishes a timeline…. Right before Leo storms out of the lair to find Raph and instead finds Nightwatcher!Raph.) bleh… I’d totally understand if ya’ll hated that part. :/ but I guess because Leo IS such a private person, it sorta fits that everything he thinks or does has always been away from his brothers so he can think things over in leader-mode. *shrugs*
Then later on, the part where Michelangelo listens in on Raph talking to Splinter - I think I watched that part of the movie about a thousand times, JUST to see how early Mikey showed up and when he disappeared. I mean, I even paused it to study the hallway to get an idea for the layout and how he could have snuck up. I’m such a geek! XD anyway, I like how it turned out cause we all saw that part from Raph and Splinter’s POV, but Mikey WAS there, he heard pretty much everything, and he DID disappear pretty fast before the end of their talk was over. So I hope that part seemed believable.
(and seriously, if you watch the part where Donnie is checking Raph over after they head to April’s and they find the stone-throwing star thingy in his shell, Raph just lays there watching him; then as soon as Leo heads over, he slaps his hand away and suddenly seems all fine XD I found it cute.)
and then here is the happy I promised you all :D and yes, there is more to come! (I just need to write more of it and edit it, and get the picture colored so I can upload it to my lj site... and so on . a lot of work). I hope this part was well worth the wait:) though I do think Raph is a lil’ out of char at the end…. Too sweet and all… but... but... it’s just so sweet having him all lovey-dovey! ;_; I had to keep it in! anyway, I hope you enjoyed :D
~Melissa the Damgel