Turtle Story: The Butter story Part 2
A loud moan burst from Mikey as Leo’s fingers dragged across that something inside of him again that not only made stars burst before his eyes, but made his whole body want to curl and writhe desperately in the amazing pleasure of it all. “Leo~o!” he cried out.
( Read more... )
And the word 'Rummy', I actually looked that one up o.0` when I was writing. And my dictionary does classify it as both the board game and also as 'drunken; and odd' (which is how I was meaning for it to be used; though I guess dreamy could work...).
and, did I put 'Red bandana-ed' somewhere? ... that's even a little odd for me... i think i did put 'banana' somewhere when i meant mask, but it was 3AM in the morning and I forgot the word mask... and I needed to finish my fast 2nd edit to get it posted so I could go to sleep before my alarm went off at 6 so I could then get up and go to work....
i honestly didn't notice that i was using the nicknames so much, and I think it's because like, 'Mikey' that's just his name, it's not a nickname to me. but i'll try and use their full names more often... it's sorta hard to descibe four turtles that look alike other than their colored masks ^-^` (and that's if I'm using the movie and cartoon versions. In the comics they all wear red masks as you know).
and the words that sound alike; yes, those give me problems all the time, i try to use them right (looking them up in the dictionary to make sure it means how I'm trying to say it)... though, a long time ago, a teacher told me the wrong usage for words, for example: "to, and too". so i now have to break word-habits from elementary school (and a lot of the similiar words are the same way for me.) (i thought i had gotten down the Breath and Breathe >_< gah, back to the drawing board.) though... i did not know my MS has a grammer check... ... i'll have to find that and play with it to see what it can do for me. that would help immensely.
I want to get better at the self-edit thing, but the gammer always comes back to shoot me in the foot. bleh...
but thanks for the comment (it definitely eased the blow that lvsinsanity's comment dealt me right after work.) I'm glad that you enjoyed the chapter as a story (as a sound piece of grammatically-correct work of fiction... eeh... not so much). I will probably go back and fix those mistakes; it might just take me a little while because i have to allow my brain time to forget I wrote this before re-editing it will be effective. And thank you for pointing out -where- i'm having consistent problems; i'll watch for those in this next chapter i'm proofing right now.
thank you again; i'm feelin' a bit better now :) (and i'm glad you like my Lolita-Mikey picture, heh).
~Melissa the Damgel
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